Two years after I died, I suddenly regained consciousness. My mom had found a new man and was living her best life. My dad got everything he ever wanted and was enjoying his golden years surrounded by grandkids. My bestie, the only person who truly got me, finally stopped grinding her life away for her career and decided to retire early to Europe. And the guy I secretly crushed on for ten years was finally walking down the aisle with the love of his life. Everyone was doing great. I thought it was great, too—even if my grave felt a little lonely sometimes. The night before the wedding, I floated into Lucas's bachelor party. After a few rounds of drinks, I saw my bestie raise her glass to Lucas. "Lucas, honestly? I've always hated your guts." "You shamelessly soaked up all of Jenny's affection and effort while completely ignoring her feelings." "But I know if Jenny were standing here today, she'd genuinely wish you happiness. 'Happy wedding, happily ever after,' all that jazz." "So, I'll say it for her." "Happy wedding. Happily ever after." 1 Hearing those words, I froze. Lucas, as always, kept his face devoid of emotion. "Rachel, you're drunk." "Fine, assume I'm drunk. Assume I'm talking nonsense," Rachel said, downing her drink in one gulp. "Anyway, Jenny's been gone for two years." "I booked a flight for tomorrow morning. I won't be at your wedding." Rachel handed Lucas two red envelopes. "Here. One from me, one for Jenny." Lucas didn't take them. "Why are you giving me Jenny's share?" "Why do you think? She prepared her gift money ages ago. Made me promise to give it to you." "Hey, come on, it's a happy day. Don't bring the mood down," an old friend chimed in, trying to smooth things over. "We know you and Jenny were tight, but Jenny never said she liked Lucas, right?" "Besides, she's been gone a year. What's the point of bringing this up now?" "Saying this the night before Lucas's wedding... what is the bride supposed to think?" Rachel sneered. "I don't give a damn what she thinks! I've hated her since day one." "Relax. Even if I hate you guys, this is the last time you'll see me." Rachel shoved the envelopes into Lucas's pocket and stormed off. I floated there, panicked. I looked at Lucas, hesitated for a second, then chased after Rachel. "Rach! Rach, slow down! My little legs can't keep up!" Rachel always speed-walked when she was mad. She was tall, all legs. I always had to hustle to keep up. But every single time, she would eventually stop, huffing, and wait for me. Then she'd poke my forehead and call me a dummy. Too bad she couldn't see me now. So she never stopped. 2 I never expected her to drive to my cemetery in the middle of the night. When I first woke up, I was tethered to my grave. There were no other ghosts around, so I just sat on my headstone like a gargoyle, watching the sun rise and set. No one talked to me. No one saw me. I talked to myself a lot. Sometimes I'd pop up in front of mourners and make faces. They'd chat right through my soul, and I'd call them rude. Then one day, I realized I could wander further. So I went to check on my old crew. They were all living good lives. So I figured, as long as they were happy, it didn't matter if they visited me or not. 3 Rachel brought a handkerchief. She squatted in front of my grave and meticulously wiped away the dust. "Sorry. I know you hate being lonely, but I haven't come to see you in so long." Rachel sat down, leaning her back against my headstone. I sat down next to her, shoulder to shoulder. "You always said you were a coward, but you were way braver than me. Look at me. Even today, I can't accept that you're gone." "I didn't bring flowers today. Didn't bring those candied apples you love. Are you mad at me?" I hugged my knees and smiled at her. "Since you cleaned my grave, I'll forgive you." "Jenny, I'm leaving." "I'm emigrating. Probably won't come back much." "There's nothing left for me here. Even you left me. No point staying." I nodded. "It's okay. Go if you want. Follow your heart." "I know you'd support whatever I do. But I still have to tell you something that might make you mad." "Lucas is getting married." "To Chloe." "I told him you had a crush on him for ten years. You probably hate that." "But I just couldn't get over it." "Not throwing my drink in their faces was already me taking the moral high ground." "I'll never forget the look on Chloe's face when she stood in front of you, calling you a desperate pick-me who throws herself at men for free." "Your taste in people was always trash. Whether it was me, your friend, or Lucas, the guy you loved... we were never considerate enough." "Most of the time, you were the one accommodating us." "Jenny... is there another world after death? Are you happy there?" I thought for a moment. "I don't know if there's another world, but I'm doing okay right now." Not super happy, not super sad. Just okay. "Rach, you don't need to feel guilty. And you don't need to take it out on Lucas. He didn't do anything wrong." "He just didn't like me. That's all." 4 I always thought I was lucky. I was the product of a business marriage. My parents had their own careers and lovers; they rarely looked my way. But I lived a cushy life. Designer clothes, best schools. I was introverted. In high school, bullies targeted me constantly. But the worst time, I met Rachel. She bravely called the cops and even got hurt protecting me. I had no ambition, just wanted to coast. My parents didn't care about my future, so I was lost. But Lucas stood out. The way he spoke on stage captured my heart instantly. To chase him, I studied my butt off and got into the same university. Rachel called me a chicken. She said I followed Lucas around like a puppy for years, and he didn't even know I existed. So I gathered my courage and approached him as a "fellow alum." Classmate, acquaintance, friend, good friend. That path took me forever. I thought about confessing. Even bought a gift. But Lucas had a traumatic childhood. He had severe issues with intimacy. So I thought, fine. Don't force it. Just being friends was enough for me. Then one day, Lucas went on a business trip for a week. When he came back, he had a woman with him. Chloe. The high school prom queen. Now Lucas's girlfriend. That's when I realized: "trauma" and "walls" are just excuses. When you meet the right person, the walls come down. The shadows disappear. I couldn't do it. But Chloe did. Love is so unreasonable. It doesn't care about first come, first served. When "The One" shows up, everyone else becomes a background character. Too bad. I had main character energy but a side character destiny.
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