1 The power cut out suddenly during the Winter Formal. In the pitch-black chaos, an arm slid around my waist. A voice, laced with a confident smile, murmured close to my ear, “Hey, beautiful. Mind if I steal a kiss?” Before I could even process the words, the lights flickered back on. The boy—the boy—saw my face. His arm dropped away as if he’d been burned, and he muttered a curse under his breath. “Sorry,” he said, his voice flat. “Wrong person.” After three years of a silent, hopeless crush, that was the first thing Miles Butler ever said to me. 2 The first time I ever heard the phrase “the golden couple” used in real life, it was about Miles Butler and his girlfriend. My best friend, Maya, filled me in. “You know that new transfer student, Sophia Lane? She actually managed to win over Miles. Damn… I guess that’s what being the most popular girl in school gets you.” Miles was in the class next door. Before they were a couple, I’d watched Sophia’s campaign unfold. She brought him coffee on cold mornings, slipped notes into his locker, and once, I saw her crying in the hallway, asking him, “Is your heart made of stone? I really, really like you.” A small, petty part of me had been waiting to see her fail. He’d turned down so many girls; she would just be another one on the list. But then, they got together. He had a girlfriend. The moment that reality sank in, I stopped stealing glances at him in the hallway between classes. I had a travel mug I’d bought from the school store in my freshman year. It had a delicate floral pattern on it—snowdrops. A few weeks after they started dating, I overheard Sophia telling her friends that snowdrops were her absolute favorite flower. I never used that mug again. But I never imagined that the first time he’d ever speak to me would be because he’d mistaken me for her. Under the harsh gym lights, his expression was cool and distant. “About what just happened…” he started, his eyes avoiding mine. “Can we just pretend it didn’t?” The spot on my lower back where his hand had rested was still burning. I found my voice, but it came out raspy. “Yeah. I won’t tell anyone.” Just as the words left my mouth, Sophia came running over. She didn’t even see me, grabbing Miles’s arm possessively. “There you are! Come on, I found us a better spot to see the stage.” As they walked away, I stood rooted to the spot, my limbs numb and tingling. I didn’t watch them go. A moment later, Maya appeared at my side, her eyes wide. “Oh my god, I just saw Miles Butler talking to you! What did he say? You guys were so close!” My breath hitched, my heart pounding against my ribs. But before I could figure out how to answer, she’d already moved on. “He is seriously so handsome, though. Like, not a single bad angle. I secretly snapped a picture. Wanna see?” I let out a shaky breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding. I shook my head. “No, thanks.” 3 After that night, I poured everything I had into my studies. My personality was… quiet. A little boring, maybe. But I was good at school. From my freshman year to my junior year, I’d known Miles from afar for three years. In all that time, the only thing I looked forward to after an exam was the results. It was the only time our names could appear next to each other, publicly and legitimately, on the school’s ranking board. Shortly after the winter break, we had our mid-term exams. This time, I told myself not to get my hopes up. When the results were posted, I waited until the end of the day to check the board outside the main office. “Miles’s still number one. The guy’s a machine.” “Whoa, look! Second place changed. Holy crap, it’s Sophia.” The sun was warm that day, a gentle winter afternoon, but my heart felt like it was freezing over. She was brilliant, too. She had so effortlessly surpassed me. I stood there for a long time before turning and walking away. That evening, I stayed late in the classroom finishing homework. As I was walking back to the dorms, someone called out. “Excuse me.” I turned around. It was Miles. He was holding a large bag of snacks, some of them in fancy packaging I’d never seen before. He didn’t seem to recognize me. “Could you do me a favor and give this to Sophia Lane?” For a split second, I don’t know what I was thinking. I just reached out and took the heavy bag from him. “Oh. Okay.” As I spoke, his eyebrows shot up in recognition. “Wait a sec… it’s you.” I looked up, surprised. He didn’t elaborate, just reached into the bag and pulled out a small box of chocolates. “Thanks for this. Here, this is for you.” I was about to refuse, but he had already turned and walked away into the darkness. After a moment’s hesitation, I put the box of chocolates back into the bag. I went upstairs and found Sophia’s room. The door was ajar. “Sophia, you’re Miles Butler’s first girlfriend. A guy like that, who’s so smart—is he, like, a really good boyfriend?” I froze outside the door, my hand raised to knock. Then I heard Sophia’s voice. It was light and musical, with a distinctly girlish charm. “Him? Ugh, he’s… okay, I guess.” “Have you guys kissed yet?” “Nope. He’s like a block of wood. Makes zero moves.” I pressed my lips together. That’s not true. He had made a move. It was just under a hazy moon and a blanket of darkness. He’d mistaken the girl, and his sweet, whispered words had been for someone else.
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