I saved my ex-boyfriend’s daughter in a car accident, but I lost my own life in the process. When he was sorting through my belongings, he accidentally found my diary. In the diary, he loved me deeply. He remembered every old scar on my body. To make up for my childhood regrets, he stood in the freezing cold on Christmas Day, fighting a high fever, just to build me a snowman. In the diary, we never broke up. We got married. Our life was stable, sweet, and full of love. It was a story that didn't exist in his memory. It was a love buried deep, one he never knew existed. 1 Ethan’s daughter was saved in the crash. The person who saved her, however, didn't make it. His wife held their daughter tightly, her face a mask of terror and relief. Ethan, however, was staring at the woman surrounded by the crowd. She was thin—too thin. Her hair was plastered messily across her face, obscuring her features. Someone in the crowd whispered, "That car was speeding like crazy. If that woman hadn't rushed out and pushed the little girl away, she would have been..." His wife covered their daughter’s eyes, shielding her from the bloody scene. Ethan felt a strange, nagging familiarity. It took him a long moment before a hazy memory surfaced. This woman looked like his ex-girlfriend. Her name was... Chloe. The ambulance arrived quickly, taking both the woman and his daughter. His daughter, Lily, was lucky. Aside from a few scrapes, she was physically fine, though traumatized, refusing to leave her mother’s arms. The woman was indeed Chloe. The police told him she didn't seem to have any family. No one came to identify the body. In her phone contacts, under "Emergency Contact," there was only his number. Ethan was surprised. In his memory, they had only dated for two weeks, five years ago. Chloe had grown cold toward him quickly and eventually initiated a very rational, mutual breakup. They hadn't been deep in love, so he hadn't dwelt on it. But that was five years ago. He couldn't believe Chloe still had his number. 2 Regardless of their past, Chloe had died saving his daughter. He was grateful. Upon learning she had no other kin, he volunteered to handle her funeral arrangements. A few days later, her landlord contacted him to clear out her apartment. He agreed. Surprisingly, Chloe’s apartment wasn't far from his own, yet he had never run into her. She lived alone. The place was small but decorated with a warm touch. Life is unpredictable. He never imagined that seeing her again after all these years would be under such tragic circumstances. Chloe lived simply. There wasn't much to pack. Halfway through clearing a drawer, he found a large stash of medication. He frowned and looked up the name on one of the bottles. Erlotinib. A targeted therapy drug used for cancer treatment. Chloe was sick? Underneath the pile of pill bottles, he found a thick, leather-bound notebook. He opened it. It was her diary. As an outsider, he knew he shouldn't pry into the privacy of the deceased. But looking at the array of medicine bottles, the police officer's words echoed in his ears: She has no family... only your number. Suddenly, he desperately wanted to know how she had lived these past few years. 3 Ethan went to the kitchen, poured a glass of water, returned to the desk, and opened the diary. The entries were sporadic at first. He gathered that her childhood and adolescence had been rough. Chloe once had a happy family, but her father died in a factory accident when she was five—without compensation. Her mother fell into a deep depression and passed away early. She worked her way through college and stumbled into adulthood. Despite it all, she was optimistic. The tone wasn't negative. The entries stopped for a long time, likely due to work. When they resumed, his name appeared. July 6, 2018 - Rainy I must be exhausted lately. I fell asleep waiting at the bus stop. I woke up shivering. There was a guy standing in front of me, holding an umbrella. I realized it was pouring rain—a total downpour. No wonder it was so cold. The guy saw I was awake but didn't speak. I jumped up, confused, thinking I’d hogged the bench too long. Only then did I realize the rain was coming in sideways. The shelter didn't stop anything. I realized belatedly that he was blocking the rain for me. Sure enough, the back of his shirt and pants were soaked through. It was dark fabric, so it wasn't obvious at first. I thanked him profusely. He just shook his head and said, "You look tired." Then, something embarrassing happened. My period started early. I stained the bench and my jeans. I wanted to die of shame. Luckily, his bus arrived. Before he got on, he took off his long coat and handed it to me. "This is long enough. It should cover it." I tried to refuse, of course. He just smiled. "You can return it if we ever meet again." Then he got on the bus. Writing this now, my heart is pounding. Chloe, look. He really didn't recognize you. July 10, 2018 - Sunny My new neighbor is him. We bumped into each other at the elevator while taking out the trash. He clearly recognized me this time. He froze for two seconds, then smiled. My spine stiffened. I blurted out, "I... I washed your coat. I'll bring it over." So awkward. He smiled and said, "Okay." He told me his name is Ethan. In my heart, I replied: I know. I know your name is Ethan. July 11, 2018 I regret returning the coat. Now what excuse do I have to talk to him? July 15, 2018 - Sunny It’s the weekend. I "accidentally" bumped into Ethan walking his dog when I went to take out the trash (I totally timed it). He sniffed the air and said, "Did you cook? It smells amazing." I nodded, eyeing the takeout bag in his hand. "I made too much. Do you want to try some?" He looked hopeful but asked politely, "Is it convenient?" I nodded. "Super convenient." He paused, then smiled. Chloe, you are so much braver than you were seven years ago. July 19, 2018 - Rainy Today is my birthday. No friends in this city, colleagues are just acquaintances. I was going to spend it alone. I ordered a small cake. When I opened the door to get the delivery, Ethan was coming out. He saw the cake and asked if it was my birthday. I nodded. He paused and asked if I was celebrating alone. I nodded again. Then... the elevator arrived, and he went down to dump his trash. Sigh. I was about to light the candle when the doorbell rang. Ethan was standing there with bags of groceries, smiling. "You treated me last time. Let me cook for you this time." I was in a daze until he put on my apron. The food was delicious. Especially the beer duck. He put the candles on the cake and wished me a happy birthday so gently. Ethan, I was really happy today. Thank you. 4 Buried memories slowly sharpened in Ethan’s mind. He had always thought the bus stop was their first meeting. But according to Chloe, she knew him long before that. Yet he had no memory of it. The mystery grew, urging him to turn the page. August 1, 2018 - Sunny My feelings are complicated. Ethan is now my boyfriend. We were grocery shopping when he suddenly asked, "What are we? Just food buddies?" I laughed and said, "I guess so." Then he asked if I wanted to be with him. I said, "Be with you to do what?" He looked at me, exasperated. "To date. To be a couple." I froze. It felt like winning the lottery. When I didn't answer, he stopped walking and looked at me. I thought about it, and I said yes. He seemed relieved. August 5, 2018 - Sunny I gave him a bento box for lunch again. He said I’m too good to him, that it makes him feel guilty. Compared to what he did for me, this is nothing. He doesn't understand. He is the only person in the world qualified to accept my kindness. August 12, 2018 I'm sick. The flu, I think. Took the day off. I feel terrible. Ethan is on a business trip. I didn't tell him; I didn't want to distract him. On the phone, he asked why my voice was raspy. I said I slept poorly. He asked, "Why are you coughing?" I lied, "Choked on water." He just said "Oh" and went silent. The next morning, he was at my door. He flew back. He made me porridge and soup. He propped me up with pillows because he remembered my back hurts when I sit too long. Being sick made me weak. I started crying into the soup. He panicked, rubbing my back, asking if my old waist injury was flaring up. He said, "I brought patches and painkillers. I was going to take you to a specialist when I got back." I only mentioned my back pain once. He remembered. I cried harder. "You're so good to me." He laughed. "This counts as good?" No. It’s so much more than that. Being with him... at first, I just wanted to repay him. I was happy just to do that. But now, I’m the one getting greedy for happiness. August 27, 2018 - Cloudy Company sent me out of state to sign a contract. Six hours driving. I told Ethan I’d stay the night. But the landlord texted: Power outage in our complex. Won't be fixed until 2 AM. Ethan... he’s actually terrified of the dark. And ghosts. I finished the contract and drove back like a maniac. Got there at 9 PM. I used my key. The apartment was pitch black. I thought he was asleep. I walked in and bumped right into a wall of muscle. He grabbed my arm, voice shaking. "Chloe?" I said yes. He exhaled a long breath. His hands were ice cold. "Trying to scare me?" he asked. I denied it. He hugged me tight, punishing me, and pulled me to the bed. I felt something in his hand. A small fabric pouch. I asked what it was. He said it was a protective charm his mom got him. He’d been squeezing it so hard it was damp with sweat. I laughed at him. He pouted and said he felt like the room was full of people. I suddenly remembered. Ethan is afraid of the dark, yet he once stood in the freezing dark of winter to keep a stranger safe for hours. He has always been a good man. In the dark, Ethan became very... active. I kind of hope the power never comes back on.
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