One of the must-do things when you transmigrate into a story: activate the system and flirt with the villain! Easy, right? I specifically picked the most brutal one. After a relentless campaign of seduction, what happened to that villain? He drapes coats over my shoulders, peels my oranges, and is too scared to even catch a chicken. Mission accomplished! But then, the system pops up again: [My dear Host! Why haven't you started seducing the villain yet??] Huh? I did! Are you not satisfied with our little kitten? The system seemed to glitch for a few seconds: [That's the male lead! The villain is his soft-spoken, gentle older brother.] Crap. I seduced the wrong guy. I quickly faked my death, switched accounts, and married his brother. On my wedding night, a servant came screaming: "Help!! Someone's killing their way in!!" 1 I leaned against Damien, watching him peel a tangerine for me. "Remember to take off the white stringy bits." Damien chuckled softly. His slender fingers held a clean tangerine segment to my lips. I deliberately bit his finger. He didn't get mad. He peeled another segment and fed it to me. Only this time... He pushed it in a little further and didn't pull back. I glared at him, whimpering, unable to speak, my cheeks burning hot. Damien was doing this on purpose. He asked, "Want more?" I wanted the tangerine! Just then. A crackling sound of electric current rang in my brain. The system, which had been missing for ages, appeared, screaming excitedly: [Host! Who is this wild man? Why haven't you started seducing the villain yet? I've been criticized by the Mission Administration Bureau!] I gestured toward Damien with my eyes: "The villain? I'm done. He now asks ants if it hurts before stepping on them. Dear System, you're finally online. When do I get my manor, my ten billion dollars, and my spaceship?" The system was silent for 1.5 seconds. Then it broke down: [I just checked the mission guide. This wild man is the male lead! You seduced the wrong person! The villain is his gentle-spoken older brother, waaaah!] I broke down too. Waaaah! 2 Six months ago. The system brought me to this world to seduce the villain. It only managed to tell me the villain was a prince before getting kicked offline. Relying on my stereotypical knowledge of villains, I scanned the princes. And I chose Damien. Because he was the fiercest, the most irritable, and the most handsome. He always said things like, "Believe it or not, I'll chop your head off." A guy like that. How could he not be the villain! So, I put my heart and soul into it, watching the moon with him every night. Wobbly moons, double moons... I finally turned him into this peaceful, domestic creature. I am truly the chosen one of seduction. And now you tell me I got the wrong guy? The villain is Damien's brother, Julian, the one who always smiles and speaks as gently as a spring breeze? That's like telling an ox it plowed the wrong field! "Damn system, I hate you!" System: [Host, I've applied for a 'fake death' opportunity for you. You can switch identities and re-seduce the real villain. You'll still get the rewards after success.] "Good system. I've thought about it, we can still be friends." "By the way, how do I die?" The system cleared its throat: [Choked to death on a tangerine.] 3 I heard Damien went crazy. One second I was giggling, the next I was authentically choking to death on a tangerine right in front of him. I'd go crazy too. He carried my body everywhere, seeking doctors. The most respected doctor in the Imperial Hospital said I was dead and couldn't be saved. Damien drew his sword, held it to the doctor's neck, and roared, "Say that again, and believe it or not, this prince will chop your head off!" When the system relayed this to me. It sounded unsure: [Host, didn't you say Damien asks ants if it hurts before stepping on them...?] "Oh, the limited-time skin expired." I sat in front of the bronze mirror, calmly applying eyebrow pencil and lipstick. Sticking all sorts of gold hairpins into my head. Once they're on my head, they're mine~ At dawn, I'm going to marry Damien's brother under this brand-new identity and become Damien's sister-in-law! But this face... "Dog system, dare you be any lazier? How is this different from my previous face?" System: [There's a difference, Host. Look closely, there's a mole under the eye now. Time was tight, couldn't customize a new face. I'll give you a hundred free customization cards after this mission!] Thanks, but I'm full. "Good system, don't you think Damien is perfect villain material? Why don't you just make him the villain? I'll seduce him this way and that way again, easy peasy!" The system refused decisively: [No, the male lead belongs to the female lead.] Oh, why do I feel a little disappointed? "Really can't? Then what were those beautiful times I spent seducing him? Seaweed?" System: [Consider it karma.] 4 Julian is the Third Prince of the current dynasty. Even though he's not favored. Even though he's marrying the illegitimate daughter of a Duke. Every living prince and princess showed up. Damien came too. He just looked unwell, pale-faced, eyes dull. Like a crazy concubine just released from the cold palace. Wearing a red veil, supported by two maids, I walked through the hall draped in red silk. Maybe it was my imagination. When I passed Damien, I felt a strong murderous aura and shivered involuntarily. Later, when Julian held my hand for the ceremony. The feeling intensified. Like ten thousand needles stabbing my back. I panicked: "System, Damien won't recognize me, right..." System: [Guaranteed not to! Don't worry, Host. Two hours ago, I fixed a series of bugs caused by your mistaken seduction~] Are you shading me? To verify its words. The system deliberately blew a gust of wind, lifting a corner of my veil. Damien remained expressionless. But the surrounding NPCs started reciting their lines: "How can there be such a beauty in the world!" "Oh my god! I saw a fairy!" So, amidst a sea of starry-eyed gazes. I gracefully moonwalked out of the scene.
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