01 The day I agreed to be Alec Gable’s secret lover, he gave me the rules: “Stay in the shadows. Never call yourself my girlfriend in public.” I nodded. I knew how to survive in a gilded cage. Yet the very next day, he paraded me before a wall of cameras. Every reporter gasped when they saw my face. Five years later, I still didn’t know why. Then one night, he came home smelling of whiskey and said flatly, “Renee, our contract is over. We’re not renewing.” My hands, carving a rabbit from an apple, stilled. I managed a quiet “Mm.” Alec hugged me from behind, chin on my shoulder, nibbling my ear. “What’s wrong? Can’t bear to leave me?” I whispered, eyes down, “I wouldn’t dare.” He chuckled low. “Is there anything you wouldn’t dare?” I stayed silent. He was right. I’d dared too much already—taking his money, his body, and finally daring to want his love. The ache in my chest was my punishment. Alec released me. “But before we part, I’ll grant you one last request.” ... “Help me sort out my sister’s legal guardianship and her school enrollment.” I washed the paring knife and turned to face him, my expression placid. “I’ll move out as soon as possible. I’d appreciate your help with that, Mr. Gable.” He stared at me, as if trying to decipher a puzzle on my face. “Nothing else?” I shook my head. “Nothing.” “Fine.” For some reason, I could hear the sound of him gritting his teeth in that single word. I started packing that night. Every luxury item Alec had ever bought me, I listed on a resale website. As for the car and the apartment in my name, I scheduled a meeting with his assistant to sign them back over. Alec watched me in silence. As I sat on the floor to catch my breath, he tossed a piece of black lace onto my lap. It was a scandalously revealing nightgown. “Renee, why don’t you sell this while you’re at it?” I stared at him, bewildered by his sudden anger. He gripped my chin, forcing me to meet his gaze. “Put it on.” My fingers traced the flimsy fabric, my cheeks burning. “N-now?” “Can we wait? The sun hasn’t even set.” His hand began a slow, deliberate journey over my body. His eyes were dark, his voice a low command. “Why?” “Do I need to make an appointment to sleep with you now?” I bit my lip and looked down, not daring to breathe. Alec had a reputation for being a difficult, inventive lover. The first time I was in his bed, I didn’t even know what a safeword was. He’d pushed me to the edge of consciousness, every bone in my body feeling like it had been ground to dust. All I could do was make small, animalistic whimpers beneath him. My tears hadn’t moved him in the slightest. If anything, they had excited him more. The next morning, his assistant delivered a mountain of designer boxes, things I’d only ever seen in magazines. Tucked inside was a note. “Next time you can’t take it, just say ‘I love you.’” My face had burned with shame. “What are you thinking about?” Alec’s hand gave my hip a light, impatient tap. I snapped back to the present, slowly lifting my eyes to meet his. He raised an eyebrow. “What, you’re refusing to take my orders now?” But just as I stood there in the nightgown, practically naked, his phone rang. I could hear a cool, detached female voice on the other end. She called him “Jules.” I knew who it was. His fiancée, the one he’d been betrothed to since childhood. The daughter of Port Sterling’s wealthiest tycoon, Juliette Monroe. Alec flirted with her in a low, intimate voice, while his hand stroked the curve of my waist with a deliberate, suggestive pressure. I didn’t understand why he was still in the mood for this, not now. Just as I’d never understood what he, a man who had everything, had seen in me, a girl working at a roadside food stall. He hung up and pulled me into his arms. “Juliette wants to meet you.” My head snapped up. His eyes were glinting with a familiar, mocking amusement. It took me a moment to find my voice. “Mr. Gable, I know my place.” “If you need me to, I can leave right now.” He let out a low, unreadable laugh. “If you know your place, then you know you can’t refuse my requests until the contract is officially over.” He looked down at me, his power absolute. “Don’t forget, Renee. Your sister’s future is still in my hands.” 02 The moment he mentioned my sister, I knew I had lost. And when I saw Juliette Monroe, I understood exactly why the heiress had insisted on meeting the canary in the cage. We looked so much alike it was jarring. But the effortless air of nobility that clung to her was something an orphan like me could never hope to replicate. I was a blurry shadow behind her, a speck of dust on the sole of her shoe. When she saw me, a flicker of shock crossed her face. But the wealthy socialite quickly composed herself, her expression hardening into a mask of cool disdain. She stirred her coffee, the spoon clinking softly against the porcelain. She looked up at Alec, a smirk playing on her lips. “Alec, are you really that obsessed with me?” He leaned back in his chair, completely at ease, a playful light in his eyes. “Of course, Juliette.” “All those years you were abroad, you broke my heart.” I stood awkwardly beside them, feeling like an ill-trained servant. “And besides,” Alec added, glancing at me, “she’s not just a copy.” “She’s more fun, too.” “When I play too rough, she doesn’t get angry. She just cries. Endlessly.” “Not like you. A little too much pressure and you throw a tantrum. I have to buy you a new property just to get you to calm down.” “Renee isn’t like that. She’s obedient, easy to please. A single designer lipstick can make her happy for days.” Juliette gave me a long, unreadable look. “Is that so?” “She sounds… accommodating.” Juliette stood, moving with the liquid grace of a cat. She walked over to me, and before I could react, she tilted the cup. Scalding hot coffee streamed down from the top of my head. I flinched, instinctively trying to pull away, but Alec’s voice cut through the air, cold and sharp. “Don’t move.” I bit my lip so hard I tasted blood. Tears welled in my eyes, whether from the burn or the humiliation, I couldn’t tell. Only when the last drop of coffee had dripped from my hem onto the floor did Alec pull a napkin from the dispenser and hand it to me. “What are you waiting for? Thank Juliette.” In all my time with him, I had never been so humiliated, except perhaps in his bed. My body was shaking uncontrollably. “Th-thank you, Miss Monroe,” I stammered. Juliette saw my shame and seemed to relish it. She picked up a silver butter knife from the table and used it to tilt my chin up. “Who are you trying to impress with this stoic act?” “You’re nothing but a common whore selling her body in a man’s bed.” The flat of the blade tapped against my cheek. “And now you think you have the right to put on airs?” I forgot to even cry. All I could think was that the insults of the wealthy were just as ugly as the curses of the gossiping old women from my village. “That’s enough. Wipe that pathetic, bullied look off your face,” Juliette said, tossing the knife back onto the table with a clatter. “Now get out.” It was a pardon. I turned, desperate to flee. But before I could take a single step, she spoke again. “And leave behind anything that has to do with Alec.” “And make sure you never appear in front of us again.” I shook my head softly. “I don’t have anything of his on me.” “Really?” Juliette’s eyes roamed over me, from head to toe. Her red lips curled. “That dress. It’s from the new season.” “Alec didn’t buy it for you?” She was going to make me strip. She was going to make me walk out of here naked. My head whipped around, my eyes pleading with Alec. 03 Alec was leisurely spearing a piece of watermelon with his fork. He met my gaze with a look of mild confusion. “Didn’t you hear what Juliette said?” “Or do you need me to show you the receipt?” In that moment, I felt something inside me shatter. “Fine.” I lowered my eyes, my voice so stiff it sounded like a stranger’s. “Go back to whatever gutter you crawled out of, Renee,” Alec said, delivering his final judgment. “I’ll be selling that apartment soon.” I listened to his words as I unzipped the coffee-stained dress, peeling it off inch by inch, until I was left in nothing but my faded white bra and a pair of worn-out leggings. Juliette laughed. “Jules, you really know where to spend your money and where to save it.” Alec glanced over, shrugging nonchalantly. “She doesn’t need to wear anything at home, and I don’t see her when she’s out.” “Seems like a waste of money to me.” A waste of money. I swallowed the bitter lump in my throat. He was right. In his eyes, I was nothing more than a life-sized doll, one that conveniently had its own emotions. I went back to the small rental I shared with my sister, Zoe. She was already asleep, her young face soft and beautiful in the moonlight. I never had much of an education, and I was determined that the little girl I’d found next to a dumpster years ago wouldn't share my regrets. But I couldn’t legally adopt her, and the meager income from my food cart wasn’t enough to support us both anymore. So when Alec had offered to take care of me, I had barely hesitated. I just wanted the money. I wanted Zoe to be able to finish school, to have a future. I never thought I would fall in love with him. Even with my limited education, I knew what it meant to be worlds apart. But my heart didn't understand. It thought it could leap from the mud to the heavens, that a man like him might give a second glance to something so beautifully, tragically flawed. And he did. He gave it a second glance because it was so pitifully dirty, and so laughably soft. The next morning, a video of me leaving a high-end restaurant late at night, dressed only in my underwear, was the top trending topic online. In the video, the license plates of the luxury cars parked nearby were carefully blurred out. Only my face was in sharp, humiliating focus in every single frame. The phone in my hand felt like a block of ice. My hands, my heart… everything was so cold. Zoe, who had just left for school, suddenly burst back through the door. Her face was ashen. “Renee.” My name was a venomous hiss from between her teeth. “Is this the ‘better job’ you told me about?” “Being some rich guy’s mistress?” “All those nights you weren’t home… were you working overtime in some man’s bed?” “You’re disgusting!” “Get out! I don’t want to live with someone as filthy as you!” I stared at her, my face on fire, my eyes burning. I wanted to defend myself, but she wasn’t wrong. I had built our future in Alec Gable’s bed. But the future hadn’t arrived, and now there was no going back. I licked my chapped lips, my voice soft. “I’ll go. Don’t be angry.” “There’s cash in my purse. Make sure you eat properly.” Like an enraged bull, she snatched my purse and dumped its contents, flinging a shower of bills at my face. “Let me tell you something, Renee!” “I would rather starve to death than use your filthy money!” “Now get out!” 04 I left. A lot of people in this neighborhood knew me. Back when I ran the food cart, I’d had a brief moment of viral fame. They called me the "Fried Snack Beauty." Now, they pointed and whispered, calling me the cheap slut who sold more than just fried food. I walked aimlessly until I found an empty alley and called Alec’s assistant. “Zoe is an adult now. I don’t want her guardianship tied to me anymore.” “Please help her get set up independently.” I was about to hang up when Alec’s voice came through the line. “Renee. You have thirty minutes. Get back here.” I started to refuse, but he cut me off. “The contract isn’t over.” “And your sister’s paperwork isn’t finished.” I had no choice but to go back to the penthouse. Alec was there. He was sitting on the sofa, working on a tablet, his gold-rimmed glasses softening the intensity of his gaze. I sat quietly on the bench by the door, trying to figure out why he had summoned me. After a few minutes, he closed the tablet and walked over to stand before me, looking down at me from his great height. “Are you that desperate for the world to know you’re my plaything?” “Willing to sacrifice your own reputation just to get your name in the papers?” I looked up at him, shocked. I was about to tell him I had nothing to do with it when his hand clamped onto my jaw. “You just can’t bear to let me go, can you.” “Fine. I’ll give you exactly what you want.” He didn’t even wait to get to the bedroom. His mouth crushed down on mine. My struggles only seemed to excite him more. Not since the very first time had he been this rough. He hadn’t hurt me like this in years. Tears streamed down my face, but he wouldn’t let me beg for mercy. My body and my heart ached with a pain so intense I couldn’t tell where one ended and the other began. The pad of his thumb brushed away my tears, his voice suddenly soft. “Renee, I taught you.” “When you can’t take it, you say the safeword.” “Renee. Say you love me.” In the throes of agony, it felt like I was seeing his eyes for the first time. I could see my own tiny reflection in them. But the emotion behind them… I couldn’t understand it. It wasn’t love or hate, not joy or disgust. My fingers dug into the sheets. “Alec,” I said, each word a shard of glass. “I hate you.” His face instantly hardened. The lust in his eyes vanished, replaced by a cold clarity. Just before I passed out, he bit down hard on my shoulder, leaving a perfect, circular mark. When I woke up the next morning, the room was empty. Alec, with his immense wealth, wouldn’t bother taking anything from here. So I sorted through what was left, looking for anything else I could sell. In the back of a storage closet, I found the moon. It was a paper lantern I had made for him, a gift for the autumn festival, back when we had just gotten together. I remembered holding that moon in my hands like I was holding my own raw, beating heart. I had wished so fervently that Alec would always be blessed by the moon’s gentle light. I looked at the lantern now, its bamboo frame crushed, its paper skin wrinkled. He didn't care for it. So I would. I hugged the broken moon to my chest and whispered to myself, a new vow. “Then here’s to Renee Shaw. May she always be lit by her own light.”
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