A week before we were supposed to get our marriage license, my fiancé asked me to book eight train tickets to the coast. He said it would be his last trip as a bachelor, and he wanted all our closest friends and family to come along. I spent three days constantly refreshing the app, and finally managed to snag eight seats together. But right after I paid, a notification popped up. It was a poll from a group chat called "No Maya Allowed." The question was: Should Maya come on the trip? Seven votes against. One abstention. Zero votes in favor. The people voting were my fiancé, my older sister, his childhood best friend, and the younger cousin I practically raised. I asked Julian if he was the one who abstained. He rubbed his temples. "Yeah. I didn't vote against you. I think I'm already being considerate enough." "Everyone’s worried that if you come, you’ll try to control everything and ruin the vibe. Just consider this my pre-wedding space. Is that too much to ask?" I asked, "Then why did you ask me to book eight tickets?" His answer was incredibly natural. "You're good at snagging tickets. We can use the eighth seat for extra luggage, and I’ll Venmo you the money later." My older sister, Sarah, chimed in to pacify me. "You're about to be family. Don't ruin your engagement over a few train tickets." I looked down at my screen, at the eight consecutive seats. So, I had spent three days stressing out, not to plan a trip for us. I was just securing them a vacation where I explicitly wasn't invited. The app reminded me that I had ten minutes left to cancel the booking for a full refund. But in that moment, I didn't care about the refund. I cared that the man I was preparing to marry, when everyone else was shutting me out, couldn't even bring himself to cast a single vote in my favor. ... When the cancellation countdown hit nine minutes, Julian snatched my phone away. "Don't do something stupid. Those tickets are impossible to get." He quickly checked the order, confirming all eight seats were still there, and his shoulders visibly relaxed. I looked at him. "You're afraid I'll cancel them?" "You're just mad right now. You'll regret it once you cool down." "Regret what?" "Regret ruining everyone's vacation." With that, he closed the cancellation page right in front of me. My sister Sarah sat at the dining table, peeling an orange. "Julian is going to be with you every single day once you're married. It's just three days. Don't be so suffocating." "I never said he couldn't go." "Then why the attitude?" The orange peel snapped between her fingers. She frowned, wearing the exact same expression she always used when she thought I was being immature. "Maya, you always do this. You blow tiny things out of proportion until everyone is uncomfortable." Julian placed my phone back in my hand and sent me $400 via Venmo. The tickets cost $376. For the extra twenty-four dollars, he added a note: Don't be mad. Buy yourself something nice. I sent it back. He let out a low chuckle. "Here we go again." "What do you mean, 'here we go again'?" "First you say no, then you wait for me to coax you. Maya, I know your whole routine." He said it softly, even reaching out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind my ear. The gesture was so familiar that my body reacted before my brain did, leaning away to dodge his hand. He paused for two seconds. "Fine. Take a minute. Don't forget, we have to go try on our outfits for City Hall tonight." My sister checked her watch and grabbed her purse. "I'm taking off too. Oh, and by the way, the temperature drops at the beach at night. Let Chloe borrow that windbreaker you gave me. Her skin is really sensitive." I looked up. "You're not going?" "I couldn't get the time off work. I'm the one who abstained." She said it with complete conviction. "I didn't vote against you. I'm taking your side, aren't I?" So even the abstention wasn't Julian's. I looked at him. Julian fell silent for a moment, a flicker of irritation crossing his brow. "Does it really matter who voted how? The result is the same." "Then why did you lie and say it was you?" "I knew you'd interrogate me, so I just said yes to shut it down." He walked into the kitchen, opened the fridge, and peeked his head back out. "What do you want for dinner? I'll make a reservation." It was as if that humiliating poll had never happened. I didn't answer. I walked into the bedroom. Hidden deep in my closet was an old tin box. Inside were the train tickets Julian had left behind seven years ago, when he used to take the train from the next state over to visit me. We were long-distance back then. Every time he visited, he would mail his return ticket back to me. The last time, he didn't mail it. He pressed the ticket into my hand and said, "You won't have to wait for envelopes anymore. I'm moving here to be with you." On the back of that ticket, he had written two words. Coming Home. I traced the faded ink, then slipped the ticket into an empty envelope. My phone buzzed. It was a text from my Editor-in-Chief. "We still need a regional director for the Austin office. You said no before because you were getting married, but the position is still open. I need your answer by tonight." Three months ago, I had turned it down for Julian. In the living room, he was texting the itinerary to everyone going on the trip. Not a single person had texted to ask why I wasn't going. I opened the reply box and typed a single word. "Yes." Just as the message sent, Julian pushed the door open. He glanced at the envelope in my hand and smirked. "Looking at old tickets to make yourself feel better again? I'll take you out for sushi tonight, that should be enough." I shoved the envelope into the drawer. He didn't know that this time, that ticket marked Coming Home was going to be mailed back to him. That evening at the boutique, Julian was forty minutes late. The associate had already steamed his white button-down twice. When he finally arrived, Chloe—his childhood best friend, and the only woman going on the trip—was right behind him. "I ran into Chloe on the way. She wanted to do some shopping, so I brought her along." Julian took the water the associate offered. "You don't mind, right?" Before I could answer, Chloe laughed. "If Maya minds, I'll leave right now. I don't want anyone saying I don't know my boundaries." She said she would leave, but she immediately sat down on the velvet sofa. Julian frowned. "Ignore her. She's just in a mood because of the poll today." The associate walked over holding two shirts: one cream-white, one light blue. "Sir, your fiancée originally selected the white one for you. This blue one is the one this lady just picked from the window display. Which one would you like to try?" "The blue one." Julian reached for it. "Chloe always has a good eye for this stuff." The associate glanced at me awkwardly. I had come in three days ago to get his measurements and pick the style. Julian had found it too tedious to even look at the photos I sent him. When he walked out of the fitting room, Chloe walked right up to him and adjusted his collar. "This color makes you look younger. Your marriage license photos won't look so stiff and boring." Julian checked himself in the mirror. "It definitely looks better than the white one." "So, we'll go with this one?" "Yeah." I spoke up. "This is what we're wearing to get married." Chloe pulled her hands back. "Sorry, I forgot you were standing right there." The entire boutique went dead silent. Julian looked at me, a warning edge to his voice. "Chloe was just trying to help. Don't twist her words." "I didn't say anything." "It's written all over your face." He walked over and gently pressed his thumb against the crease between my eyebrows. "We're getting married in a few days. Stop making everyone walk on eggshells around your moods." I pushed his hand away. "Let's postpone getting the license." Chloe froze. But Julian just laughed, as if I had said exactly what he expected. "Fine. Postponed." He didn't even ask why. "How long do you want to push it? Until after the trip, or until you're done being mad?" "I'm not throwing a tantrum." "Right, you're not throwing a tantrum." He agreed with my words, but his tone dripped with condescension. The associate hesitantly asked if we still wanted the shirts. Julian pulled out his credit card. "Ring them both up." "Even the white one?" "Yes. She likes it." He said it so casually, as if buying the shirt I had picked was some grand gesture of consideration. After paying, Chloe stepped outside to take a phone call. She spoke for a moment, then covered the receiver. "Julian, they're asking how we're doing the room assignments." "Didn't we book four double rooms?" "The hotel says the plumbing broke in one of the doubles. They only have three doubles and one king room left. The king is a master oceanfront suite." Chloe looked at me, half-joking. "Since we have an extra train seat for luggage, and now we have an extra bed... does Maya want to come? But she'd have to share the suite with Julian." Before Julian could answer, the voices on the phone started groaning. "Please no. If she comes, she'll give us a curfew for drinking." "Let Chloe have the suite. She's been depressed lately." "Who is Julian bunking with?" Chloe turned the speakerphone down, but not all the way. I heard my cousin, Lily, say, "Who else? It's a choice between the fiancée and the best friend." Everyone turned to look at Julian. He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Chloe gets the suite. I'll squeeze into a double with Mark." "What about Maya?" Chloe asked. "She wasn't coming anyway." He answered way too fast. The paper bag in my hand holding the white shirt suddenly felt lighter. The bottom of the bag hadn't been glued properly. The shirt I had spent three days choosing fell to the floor, and someone walking past immediately stepped on it, leaving a dusty footprint. Julian bent down to pick it up. But as he did, a hotel confirmation slip fell out of his pocket. The notes section read: [Anniversary Arrangement. Ms. Chloe prefers white roses.] Julian quickly explained that it was a "divorce celebration" for Chloe. "It took a lot for her to get out of that marriage. We just wanted to cheer her up. It's not what you think." He wiped the footprint off the white shirt with a wet wipe, his tone patient. "Plus, she paid for the suite upgrade herself. I was just worried the front desk wouldn't treat her right, so I used my platinum account to book it for her and added the note." I asked, "You remember that she likes white roses. Do you remember what flowers I explicitly said I didn't want for our wedding?" His hand stopped. "Don't you just hate flowers in general?" I didn't ask anything else. For my birthday last year, he bought me a massive bouquet of stargazers. I'm severely allergic. I coughed the entire night. He sat by my bed, getting me water, promising he would remember next time. It turns out, he only remembers the people who need to be taken care of. And that wasn't me. The next day, corporate officially sent my transfer orders for Austin. I was to start at the end of the month. I didn't tell anyone. I had paid the deposits for the wedding venue and the planners. I had the entire event binder in my desk. I systematically checked the refund deadlines for every vendor, and then called a real estate agent to schedule an appraisal for our condo. That afternoon, Julian's mother called me. "Maya, Julian tells me you want to delay getting the license again?" "Yes." "Julian thinks you're just trying to scare him because you're mad he's going on a trip without you. I know you love him, honey, but you can't suffocate a man." She laughed softly, offering her advice. "Learn to be a good girl. Once you're married, you need to make sure he looks good in front of his friends." "He thinks I'm trying to scare him?" "Doesn't he know you best? Every time you threaten to break up, aren't you just waiting for him to sweet-talk you?" I held the phone, completely silent. In the past seven years, I had only ever brought up breaking up twice. The first time was when he co-signed a loan for a friend and ended up $30,000 in debt. I sold the gold bracelet my mother left me to cover the shortfall. He wrote me an IOU, swore he would pay me back double after we were married, and held me, promising he would never prioritize his friends over us again. The second time was at our engagement party. He abandoned me to deal with both of our families alone because he had to go pick up a drunken Chloe. He stood outside my apartment building in the freezing rain all night, and I eventually caved. It turns out, to him, those weren't moments of profound disappointment. They were just manipulative tactics I used to get him to coddle me. That evening, the entire travel group came over for dinner to "finalize the itinerary." As soon as I set the food on the table, Mark laughed. "Maya, can you pack Liam's allergy meds for him? His pollen allergies always act up at the beach." My cousin Lily chimed in. "And his chargers and motion sickness patches. Honestly, Maya, you complain a lot, but you're definitely the most organized." I looked at the table full of people who had actively voted to exclude me. They didn't want me there, but not a single one of them hesitated to demand the things I provided. Chloe handed me a piece of paper. "Here's everyone's ID numbers. When the return tickets go on sale, can you help us grab them? You're faster at it." "I'm busy." Her smile stiffened. "It only takes a few minutes." Julian served me a bowl of soup. "She's been swamped at work. I'll buy them." Mark waved him off immediately. "You'll never get them. Last time, Maya had to stay up until midnight refreshing the page to get them." "Then we'll figure it out when the time comes." Julian pushed the soup bowl closer to my hand and whispered, "Eat first. Don't embarrass everyone." I didn't touch the soup. After dinner, they sat in the living room playing a drinking game. Someone asked Julian, "Honestly, are you still going to hang out with us after you're married?" "Of course." "What if Maya won't let you?" Julian glanced toward me. "I'll just say I'm working late. Isn't that how I've always done it?" Laughter erupted across the room. I stood in the doorway of the home office, holding a crumpled piece of paper I found near the shredder. It was in Julian's handwriting. Chloe is depressed—If Maya asks, tell her it's a massive group trip. Drinking, staying out late, the master suite—Tell everyone to blame it on Maya being too strict, make sure she doesn't find out. At the very bottom, there was a sentence torn in half. If we postpone getting the license, it’s perfect... The rest of the sentence was missing. I walked over and asked Julian what it was perfect for. He was packing his suitcase, not even looking up. "What?" I dropped the torn paper in front of him. He glanced at it, then casually tossed it into the trash can. "Mark was just writing down stupid punishments for the drinking game. You actually took that seriously?" "That's your handwriting." "I was mocking him." "Julian, whenever you lie, your right hand touches your watch strap." His hand was currently resting directly on his watch. The room went dead silent for two seconds. He dropped his hand and finally looked at me. "Maya, do you really have to interrogate every single little thing right now?" "I just want an answer." "The answer is that I love you, and I'm going to marry you. But I can't just abandon all my friends because I'm getting married." He said it with absolute confidence. Like he was giving me a reassurance, but also a warning not to push my luck. The night before they left, our families had dinner at a restaurant. Julian framed it as a pre-wedding dinner, a chance to officially pick a new date for City Hall. During the meal, Mark brought up the poll again. "Maya, seriously, don't take it personally. We don't hate you, we just feel like we have to walk on eggshells when you're around." Lily put a piece of fish on my plate. "Maya, you've always been a control freak. Just learn to relax, complain less, and everyone will love having you around." My sister Sarah nodded in agreement. "See? They're giving you an out." I put down my chopsticks. "Then let's vote again." The table went completely silent. I looked at Julian. "Not anonymous. Right here, in front of me. You choose." "Choose what?" "Tomorrow, it's either me or Chloe. Only one of us goes." Chloe spoke up immediately. "Maya, don't force him. I don't have to go." She offered to stay, but her hand was still resting firmly on the handle of her suitcase. Julian's face darkened. "The itinerary for seven people is already locked in. If you jump in now, I have to completely rebook the tickets and the hotel." "I have a ticket. The eighth one." "That seat is for luggage." "Luggage can be checked." "You'll make everyone uncomfortable." "So you still won't choose me." Julian reached out and grabbed my wrist. Not hard, but firm enough that I couldn't pull away. "Don't make a scene in front of our parents. If you really want to go, I'll take you on a solo trip next time." "I am asking you about this time." He stared at me, the very last shred of his patience vanishing. "Fine. I choose Chloe." The people around us froze. Julian still didn't let go of my wrist. "She's in a terrible headspace right now. This entire trip was planned to help her feel better. You and I have the rest of our lives. You don't need these three days." I looked at the watch on his wrist. It was the watch he bought with his first big bonus, right after I sold my mother's gold bracelet to pay off his debt. He told me he would wear it forever, so he would never forget who stayed by his side when he was at rock bottom. Now, that watch was pressing down against my pulse. I asked, "On that piece of paper... 'If we postpone getting the license, it’s perfect...' Perfect for what?" Julian went silent. Finally, he let out a heavy sigh. "Perfect so Chloe can actually relax and enjoy the trip. She's been terrified that once we're legally married, the friend group is going to fall apart." "So you wanted to postpone it all along?" "It's just one week. We'll go to City Hall as soon as I get back. It changes absolutely nothing." "Did you start the poll too?" "Yes." "You asked everyone to vote on whether I should go, just so you could show me the results?" "I wanted you to see that I wasn't the only one who thought it was a bad idea for you to come." He even softened his voice. "Maya, you always complain that I'm not honest. This time I was completely honest, and you can't handle it." I nodded slowly. "I can handle it." Julian relaxed visibly, assuming I had finally decided to be a "good girl." I pulled the envelope with the old train ticket out of my purse and placed it on the table in front of him. "Then let's vote one more time." "On what?" "The question is: Should Maya marry Julian?" I raised my hand high. "My vote: Against." I wrenched my wrist out of his grip, stood up, and walked out. Julian didn't chase after me. He just called out in frustration, "Don't go too far, I have an early train tomorrow. We'll talk when I get back." Just before the restaurant doors closed behind me, I heard Mark whisper, "Is she seriously calling off the wedding?" Julian scoffed. "She loves me too much to actually leave." The doors shut. He had no idea that my train to Austin was leaving in twenty minutes.
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