SOS! This is So Creepy! My Cat Keeps Bringing Home Men's Underwear!Various colors, various fabrics, various styles... but they are all the exact same size. Even the scent of the laundry detergent is identical! I strongly suspect they all belong to the same guy. But what am I supposed to do with them? Please help! 1 My cat is a wanted fugitive. His mugshot is plastered right on our apartment complex's community bulletin board. I was walking back from the corner store this afternoon when I accidentally caught a glimpse of this "Wanted Poster." In the photo, my cat, Bruce, was being pinned to the floor by a very long, attractive masculine hand, forced to take a head-on mugshot. Above it was a line of small text: "Excuse me, which neighbor does this little kitty belong to? He keeps breaking into my apartment to steal things. I'd appreciate it if you could keep an eye on him and stop him from running around. Much obliged~" Wait, is there writing bleeding through from the back of the paper? I flipped it over. Sure enough, there was a warning with a completely different tone: "If this idiot cat comes back to steal my boxers again, I'm going to chop off his balls! Then I'll throw him into a pack of feral alley cats! I'll show him what living hell looks like!" So terrifying! So vicious! I shivered, and while no one was looking, I quickly ripped the wanted poster down, shoved it into my jacket, and sprinted home. 2 When I walked through the door, Bruce was lying on the couch grooming himself. Hearing me come in, he spared me a single glance before burying his face back into his fur. Looks like he just got back too. I picked up his latest loot for the day, spreading the tiny piece of fabric between my hands to inspect the front and back. This was the seventh pair. Today's pair was as obnoxious as ever, covered in a banana print. The bright, neon yellow was incredibly blinding. Just thinking about that wanted poster made my face flush red. It's not that I don't try to keep an eye on him. My cat just isn't something an ordinary person can handle. Actually, ever since he brought back the first pair of underwear half a month ago, I sealed all the doors and windows to stop him from going out. But Bruce used to be a stray. I've always let him roam a bit, and he's insanely smart and resourceful. So I literally can't keep him contained. The second I let my guard down, he slips out. But this time, I finally put my foot down. I locked him inside his heavy-duty pet crate. 3 I was extra careful this time, and Bruce never got the chance to go out and commit his crimes again. The next day, my 6:30 PM alarm went off right on time. I practically did a backflip out of bed, happily changing my clothes and blow-drying my hair. Right before leaving, I made sure to check on Bruce. He was lying listlessly in his crate, his tail giving an occasional, lazy flick. His little eyes even shot me a sneaky glare. I looked at the heavy-duty latch securely bolted on the cage, nodded in satisfaction, and shut the front door behind me. 4 At 6:30 PM on a weekday, people were getting off work or out of school. The early summer sun was softening, and the strip of shops outside the apartment complex was much livelier than during the day. With the familiar electronic "Ding-dong—Welcome!" chime, I stepped into the corner store right on schedule. The cashier girl and I were already on familiar terms. She smiled at me. "What's on the menu today?" I always felt like she could see right through my little secret. I just gave her a sheepish smile and quickly made my way toward the microwavable meals section in the back. I dawdled, eventually picking out a three-cheese chicken mac and cheese. When I came out to the register, I immediately spotted that tall figure in the dark gray hoodie. My heart leaped into my throat and just stayed there. He hadn't noticed me yet. The guy with him spotted me first, rested a hand on his shoulder, and nodded in my direction. And then, he turned his head and looked right at me. Oh, God, save me... How could a guy have such gorgeous eyes? The shape was perfect, they were naturally alluring, and his eyelashes were so thick and long! I ducked my head slightly, internally panicking. This was the seventh time I'd run into him. But my heart still felt so, so sweet! But the next second, I saw what he was putting on the counter, and I froze. Why is he buying underwear again? 5 He glanced at me, casually looked away, and pulled up Apple Pay on his phone. Suddenly, he let out a soft "Ah," and said to the cashier, "Sorry, my phone's not getting any service in here." His friend, instead of helping him out, just patted him on the back and walked outside to wait for him. Was that a smirk on his face as he left? Perfect! My moment had arrived! I stepped up and said in a tiny voice, "Um... I can cover it for you." Without waiting for an answer, I put my microwave dinner on the counter to ring up together and tapped my phone to the reader. He didn't act overly polite or awkward; he just courteously thanked me. The cashier girl smiled, her eyes crinkling, and quickly bagged our stuff. 6 Walking out of the store, my face was still burning. We had crossed paths a few times before. But this time, we were standing so close! He was incredibly handsome. Not just his eyes—his skin was clear, almost poreless. His friend had actually ditched him. Since we lived in the same apartment complex, it was only natural that we walked back together. "I'll Venmo you when I get up to my place," he said. I reflexively waved my hands. "It's okay, it wasn't much. Don't worry about it." The moment the words left my mouth, I wanted to bite my tongue off. What a perfect excuse to get his number! Why did I have to say something so stupid? He paused for a second, then said, "What's your number? Let me shoot you a text so I can add you and send the money." "Oh! Yeah, sure!" I hurriedly dug my phone out of my purse. On the outside, I was cool as a cucumber. On the inside, fireworks were going off. I'd had a crush on him from afar for so long, and my patience was finally paying off. We were making progress. I was so happy I could cry. 7 I need to check my horoscope when I get home. My luck with romance is off the charts today! This is amazing. We kept talking the whole way! Him: "Which building are you in?" I pointed ahead. "Building 12." Then I quickly asked: "What about you?" He smiled slightly. "Building 10." Oh my God, there was only one building between us. But the harsh reality I should have picked up on was that our paths were about to split. I felt a little wave of disappointment. "Watch out!" I looked up at him blankly, not registering what was happening. Before I knew it, his palm was cupping the back of my head, his other hand gripping my shoulder, and he spun me around. At the exact same time, a baseball whizzed past us at top speed and crashed into the bushes. A thirteen-year-old kid ran over, apologizing profusely. I told the kid it was fine, then looked back at the guy beside me. My eyes involuntarily dropped to the neckline of his hoodie. Just a second ago, my eyes were less than an inch away from there. I hadn't even paid attention to the near-miss with the baseball, because my entire focus had been hijacked by that sexy little red mole on his collarbone. I almost had a nosebleed. Incredible! How does every single thing about him hit all my weak spots? 8 After we parted ways, every step I took felt like I was walking on clouds. The second I stepped out of the elevator, my phone buzzed with a text from an unknown number. I saved the contact instantly. His text considerately included his name: "Ethan Hayes." I clutched my phone to my chest. Ethan Hayes. Ethan Hayes. Ethan Hayes. The more I said it, the better it sounded! Once I was done fangirling, I quickly texted my name back so he could save it: "Chloe Bennett." Then, he Venmoed me the $28 for the boxers. Probably afraid I'd reject the payment, he even added a note: "Make sure you accept it." So gentle. And so considerate. I'm doomed. I think I like him even more now. 9 I was completely lost in my own pink, bubbly fantasy when a black shadow suddenly flashed across the windowsill. Bruce, with a clump of socks in his mouth, had returned from the outside world. Caught red-handed, he froze on the windowsill, too scared to jump down. He looked absolutely ridiculous with socks dangling from his jaws. And the pet crate I had locked so securely before I left? The door was wide open. "Where have you been running wild now?!" I snatched the socks out of his mouth. He was a pro. He even knew to steal a matching pair. Wait, what's this? White tube socks? I wrinkled my nose in disgust. Who even wears these basic white tube socks anymore? And that guy, he liked those flashy, obnoxious boxers. Wild animal prints, tropical jungles, Fruit Ninja vibes—you name it. He clearly wasn't a serious guy. Right now, my heart was completely occupied by the name "Ethan Hayes." Compared to him, every other guy on earth was literal garbage. 10 Since we just officially met, I didn't want to come off too strong, or I might scare him off. Because of that, Ethan and I didn't text much after that. Two days later, I went to the complex's front gate to pick up a fruit delivery. Walking past the spot where he saved me from the baseball, I looked at the massive boxes of fruit in my arms and decided to use it as an excuse to bring him some. Okay, I admit it. I really just wanted to see him. I sent him a text testing the waters. He replied quickly: "I'm at home, but I'm in the middle of something and can't step away." I instantly deflated. But then he sent another text: "If you have time, could you come to my door? I'm on the 3rd floor, Apt 302." Oh man, the emotional roller coaster! I literally jumped for joy on the spot! 11 As soon as I stepped out of the elevator, I saw a front door wide open, the apartment bustling with people. I checked the number above the door. Apt 302. Who were all these people inside? Some had microphones, others were carrying big camera rigs on their shoulders. Were they a TV crew? Curious, I peeked my head in. The moment I showed my face at the door, Ethan saw me. He was in the middle of being interviewed by a reporter. Seeing me, he paused, offered a subtle smile that only I would notice, and then went back to speaking seriously. I had terrible timing. Just as I was about to slip away, the guy who was with him at the convenience store that day walked out and said warmly, "Hey, just wait for him a sec, okay? They're almost done." I quickly nodded. "Oh, sure, sure." Then I realized something was off and asked him, "Wait, how did you know I was looking for him?" The guy smiled meaningfully and dodged the question. "Hi, I'm Ethan's roommate, Carter."
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