In the highest echelons of New York's elite, he was known as the untouchable young master. After a single night of absurd mistakes, he, a man famous for his strict adherence to propriety, took the initiative to propose marriage and take responsibility. But he didn't love me. After we married, no matter how hard I tried, he kept me at arm's length. He was as cold and detached as a monk. Until a woman appeared who perfectly matched all his criteria for a partner. He became completely captivated by her, losing sleep over her. It turned out he wasn't devoid of human desires and emotions after all. He just didn't have them for me. 1 At 1:00 AM, Julian Sterling came home. He seemed surprised that I was still awake. "I told you, you don't need to wait up for me." "But I want to," I smiled and leaned against him. "It's only natural for a wife to wait for her husband to come home." He paused in the middle of taking off his watch. "Suit yourself." The living room was lit by only a single small lamp. In the dim light, the man's features were so perfect he hardly looked human. Every time I looked at him closely, my heart swelled with a heavy sigh. "I missed you a lot today—" My words were cut off. Julian frowned and looked at me. "What are you wearing?" I said, "It's a new nightgown. Do you like it?" "Don't do this kind of thing again." He turned and walked toward the guest bedroom. "Julian," I called out to stop him. "Today is my birthday. Can't you just spend some time with me?" He paused. "Happy birthday. I'm pretty tired today. We'll talk later." He walked into the room and locked the door behind him. Leaving me standing alone in the living room in a semi-transparent nightgown, feeling like an absolute fool. We had been married for six months, and Julian had consistently kept me at arm's length. No matter how I tried to seduce him, he remained entirely unmoved. Like a monk devoid of all worldly desires. The media always said Julian Sterling was different from the other playboy heirs. The Sterling family was notoriously strict, raising the most principled and proper young master in New York high society. But I had seen his other side. The crazy, unhinged side. Having seen it once, I was desperate to see it again. But Julian's actions told me that that night was nothing more than an accident. My phone buzzed. It was a message from my best friend, Chloe. "Have you seen Twitter?... If you haven't, promise me you won't get mad." What happened? I logged onto Twitter, and a glaring headline immediately caught my eye. #JulianSterlingLateNightRendezvousWithBeauty Oh, I knew this beauty. She was Julian's new secretary. 2 The comment section was a flood of people enjoying the drama. [Congratulations to Mr. Sterling on finding true love!] [Bring the divorce papers! Hurry up and divorce that manipulative bitch Scarlett Hayes!!] [Scarlett Hayes even posted a PDA tweet today. Bet her face stings now.] [Is there anyone left who doesn't know how Scarlett Hayes set up a one-night stand to force a marriage?...] So, Julian was with his new secretary tonight. I had seen that girl before. Twenty-two years old, fresh out of college. Very young, very pretty, and full of vibrant energy. Most importantly, she perfectly matched Julian's criteria for a partner. They met at a college recruiting event. Julian had gone to give a speech personally, and that girl, full of nerve, was the first to raise her hand to ask a question. After the event, Julian specifically pulled her resume and stared at it for a long time. To everyone's surprise, this girl went straight into the position of Executive Secretary. It's worth noting that Julian's secretarial team wielded immense power. Even the HR department had no authority over them; only he could appoint them personally. Following the clues provided by netizens, I found the girl's social media account. An hour ago, she posted an update. [Can't hold my liquor well, thanks to my kind boss for driving me home, hehe.] In the photo, she was sitting in the passenger seat, capturing Julian's hand resting on the steering wheel. 3 Early the next morning. As soon as Julian walked out of his room, he saw me. "Do you have a shoot today?" "No." "Then why are you up so early?" "What were you doing last night?" "The executive office had a team-building dinner." "A team-building dinner for a group of people, or a team-building dinner for two?" "What do you mean?" I pulled up the trending topic and threw my phone at him. Julian glanced at it and said dismissively, "The media takes things out of context. There were six people at that dinner." "Is that so? Should I believe you?" "Scarlett, don't be unreasonable. You know better than anyone how the media twists things." He was right. After all, looking across the entire entertainment industry right now, there probably wasn't an actress more hated than me. The media played a huge role in that. But those were two entirely different things. I cut straight to the point: "Do you like her? That secretary fresh out of college." "No." Faced with my direct question, Julian remained as calm and composed as ever. "Furthermore, I also don't appreciate your wild accusations. If you have too much free time, I'll have your agency book you more jobs." He spoke as if addressing a subordinate. Not a wife. I said, "I remember your ideal type. Under 5'7", long straight black hair, a clean aura, energetic and smiley. She fits every single one." And I fit none of them. I was known for being cold, glamorous, and sharp. Julian was getting annoyed. "Are you done? If you're done, I'm going to the office." "Fine, go. Today I will tell the media that Lily Carter is a homewrecker who sleeps with married men—" Julian stopped dead in his tracks. When he looked back at me, there was actual anger in his eyes. "Lily Carter is only twenty-two. She's just a kid. Are you really trying to ruin her life with rumors?" God knows how long it had been since I last saw Julian angry. The wrath of a king for a beauty—it's just a shame the beauty wasn't me. I said, "Julian, do you even remember how old I am? "Yesterday, I just turned twenty-five. "I am only three years older than her. "When I was being dragged through the mud by the entire internet, did your heart ever ache for me?" 4 My feelings for Julian started when I was eighteen. I grew up in a single-parent household. During my senior year of high school, my mom fell severely ill. I didn't go to college. After graduation, I went to work at a high-end club to raise money for her medical bills. I worked a legitimate job—strictly serving drinks, nothing else. But because of my looks, I occasionally faced verbal harassment from male customers. The manager always said the customer is god. If I didn't want to get fired, I just had to endure it. One day, I ran into a particularly difficult customer. "How old are you, little girl? Oh, eighteen? So young. You're a waitress here? Aside from serving drinks, do you offer any other services?" A group of men burst into sleazy laughter. "You don't? Stop pretending. Your uncle here isn't just rich, I'm very capable too. Come home with me tonight and you'll see. I guarantee I'll make you feel so good you'll be screaming." It was disgusting. He wanted to continue harassing me, but before he could finish his sentence, a glass of liquor suddenly rained down from above, soaking him completely. "Who the fuck—" Seeing the man who threw it, the customer froze. "Mr... Mr. Sterling, what is the meaning of this?" "Apologize to her." 5 That was the first time I heard Julian's voice. Cool and crisp, like pearls snapping off a string and falling onto a porcelain plate. He was there to negotiate a business deal. I figured if it weren't for work, he would never set foot in a place like this. Because he was completely incongruous with his surroundings. Julian carried no scent of smoke or alcohol on him. He was as cold and untouchable as a deity. After the man slinked away in shame, Julian told me, "People like that aren't fit to do business with me." "Thank you, sir." "You don't have to endure it either. Next time, remember to fight back and protect yourself." "I'll lose my job." He looked down at me. "Are you in desperate need of money?" "Yes. My mom is sick and needs money for medical bills." "What about school?" I shook my head. "Where would I get the money to study?" "Understood." Unexpectedly, Julian didn't show a trace of pity. That was good. I didn't like people pitying me. He handed me a business card with a number on it. "This is my subordinate's contact info. You can reach out to him. Our company has a charity program to help impoverished students. As long as your situation is verified, you can apply for a grant." He paused, then said his final sentence. "If you have the chance, you must study." Later, I really did receive the grant. After paying for my mom's medical bills, there was a little left over. I repeated my senior year and successfully got into a good university. It was only then that I learned he was the famous Julian Sterling. The Sterling family was a behemoth in the entertainment industry, frighteningly wealthy. And Julian was the sole heir. During my sophomore year of college, I met him for the second time. I mustered up my courage and walked up to him. "Mr. Sterling, thank you." He looked confused. "And you are?" He didn't remember me. The lighting that night had been dim, and he hadn't really looked at me closely anyway. Helping me was just a casual effort on his part. But it didn't matter. I would work hard. Sooner or later, I would stand right beside him. A year later, I became a signed actress under Julian's agency. I was finally able to confidently extend my hand to him. "Mr. Sterling, it's a pleasure to meet you." He would never know how many years I worked just for that one day. I didn't harbor any extravagant hopes for the future; just this was enough to satisfy me. But six months ago, an accident happened that completely altered our relationship. —Julian and I had a wildly absurd one-night stand. 6 Regarding that night, I only remember the hazy outlines. The agency was hosting a gala, and many VIP guests attended. I drank too much, and so did Julian. My hotel room was 606. I am certain the room I walked into was 606. But Julian was lying inside. I can't even remember how we started kissing. I was completely intoxicated, and so was he. There were many rumors about Julian in the outside world. He kept women at a distance, was strictly disciplined, and some even speculated about his sexual orientation. Others said he had some sort of hidden condition. But that night, I experienced firsthand that it was all fake! When Julian lost control, it was fatal. ... Early the next morning, someone rang the doorbell. My legs were still weak as I went to open it. Because of the hangover, my mind was still foggy, and I thought it was housekeeping. In reality, it was a swarm of reporters. Countless cameras were pointed right at me. While I stood there in shock, Julian walked over too. "Who is it?" He entered the frame before he even had time to fully put on his shirt. 7 The scandal between Julian and me exploded. The Sterling family was incredibly strict and would never allow something this scandalous to happen. Julian found me and proposed marriage. I, of course, agreed immediately. The happiness came so suddenly it completely clouded my judgment. It made me ignore the scrutinizing and cold detachment in his eyes at that moment. He asked me, "Wasn't the room number 909?" I said, "No, it was 606. You misread it." He remained silent for a moment, then spat out three words: "As you wish." It wasn't until after we were married that I understood the deep meaning behind those three words. It turned out that after that night, Julian went to the hospital for a checkup. They found traces of drugs in his system. The kind of illicit drug that makes a person lose their reason and become controlled by desire. While illegal, it wasn't exactly rare in certain circles. Who drugged him? At the same time, that morning, I had opened the door for the reporters. Who called the reporters? How did they manage to gather right outside that specific door so perfectly? Everything seemed flawlessly orchestrated. And I was the prime suspect. Julian originally never intended to solve this with marriage. But ruining the family's reputation and causing the stock to plummet made the elders in his family furious. He had no choice but to take responsibility for the incident. I tried to defend myself. I said "It wasn't me" countless times. But the coincidences were too perfect. Julian said it was very hard for him to believe me. During these six months of marriage, we slept in separate rooms. If he accidentally brushed my hand, he would pull away as if he'd been electrocuted. I didn't give up. I believed that one day, he would let go of his misunderstandings and the walls between us. But it seems I won't be able to wait for that day. Because of Lily Carter's appearance. 8 I had seen Julian scrutinizing her resume word by word. As if he was trying to catch up on her past between the lines. He was so gentle, but not toward me. After fighting with Julian, I packed my things and left the house. We gave each other the silent treatment for days, and he never reached out. A week later, I went to film a talk show. Julian came too, bringing his new secretary. We hadn't seen each other in days, and when he saw me, he only offered a distant nod from afar. Completely aloof. Lily stayed close to his side, curious about everything, constantly asking him questions. I remembered Julian hated stupid people at work. But right now, facing Lily, he was incredibly patient, answering every single question. After a while, he walked over to me. "Scarlett," he said. "I gave you the status you wanted. Don't drag innocent people into this." "We haven't seen each other in a week, and this is what you want to say?" "Just a reminder." I smiled. "So even now, Mr. Sterling, you still think I drugged you and called the reporters?" "Otherwise what?" I didn't say anything else, nor did I need to. Disappointment flooded my heart and brain, snapping me completely awake. Julian treated his little secretary wonderfully. Even though she hadn't passed her probation period yet, he let her take his place to show her face on the program. She was very talkative, bursting with energy. Until the host asked her about me. "Lily, you've only been at the company for a short while, and now you're on a show with the boss's wife. Are you nervous?" Lily glanced at me and said, "What's there to be nervous about? I know there are some nasty rumors out there, saying Scarlett used to work as a hostess at a club, and that she's super manipulative and stuff. But I want to say, Scarlett is actually a very nice person, you shouldn't be prejudiced against her!" The entire studio went dead silent. She basically just broadcasted all my darkest rumors on live television! Even the seasoned host was struck speechless by the sheer awkwardness of the moment. The host had no choice but to awkwardly change the subject. "Ahem, moving on, let's ask Scarlett. Do you have any major plans coming up? Give your fans watching at home a little teaser." "I actually do." I smiled calmly— "I. Am. Getting. A. Divorce." I enunciated every word clearly, loud and clear. Off-stage, Julian's head snapped up violently. His eyes were wide with shock and utter disbelief. 9 Inside the studio, it was quieter than it had ever been. The host looked like she wanted to die. This was probably the most excruciating moment of her entire professional career. "Why... why would you make such a decision..." "You should ask Miss Carter that." I tossed the ball back to Lily. The young girl was caught completely off guard. Did she think she was the only one who knew how to play passive-aggressive mind games? Sorry, but I prefer the direct approach. "I'm sure everyone has seen the recent news. My husband is acting ambiguously with his subordinate. Let me ask you, why would I keep a husband like that around for the holidays?" I faced the camera, a smile curling my lips. "I don't like fighting other women over men. I have a lot of things to do, I have movies to film, shows to record. Even without love, I can still live a brilliant life. "As for men, if they don't behave, just swap them out." The moment the words left my mouth, Julian seemed to finally snap out of it and forcefully demanded the cameras stop rolling. He dragged me backstage. "Scarlett, what nonsense are you spouting?" "I'm not spouting nonsense." I pried his fingers open, one by one. It was hilarious. The man who usually dodged my touch was now refusing to let go. "Julian, listen carefully. "Starting today, I, Scarlett Hayes, am officially asking you for a divorce." It was as if all the blood had been drained from Julian's body. He turned deathly pale. "You're just picking a fight with me, right? You think if you bring up divorce, I'll have to grovel." He nodded to himself. "Fine, I'll grovel. I ignored you for a few days, I was wrong, and I apologize. As for everything that happened on the show just now, I'll have PR handle it. I won't let higher-ups say a single harsh word to you. If you don't like Lily, I'll transfer her out of the executive office—" "That's not necessary." I cut him off. "Wake up. I'm not throwing a tantrum." I pulled a piece of paper from my pocket. It was a fully prepared divorce agreement. "Take a look. If you don't have any objections, sign it right now." 10 The show was broadcast live. Even though it was cut off midway, everything I said was broadcasted loud and clear. I instantly became the number one trending topic. Surprisingly, the comment section was very supportive. [I'm totally on Scarlett's side for this. That Lily whatever-her-name-is, the way she speaks is so passive-aggressive and manipulative. Disgusting.] [I've been wanting to say this for days. Regardless of how Scarlett got her position, she is the legal, rightful wife right now. Those people praising the mistress as 'true love'—what kind of garbage morals do you have?] [Supporting the wifey getting a divorce! Throw the whole man away.] [Off-topic, but Scarlett's face card is insane. Watching the live stream today, I was stunned by her beauty... Is Julian blind?] There were also people discussing exactly what Lily's deal was. Because the day after the scandal broke, Julian, while fighting with me, swiftly issued a clarifying statement. The executives who attended the dinner that night also posted group photos. The rumors were immediately dispelled. But my interview seemed to re-confirm their ambiguous relationship. Would someone as strictly disciplined and rigid as Julian really cheat? Speculation ran wild on the internet. Soon, the company's disciplinary actions were announced. Because of her inappropriate remarks, Lily Carter was severely reprimanded and transferred to another department. Everyone said this was Julian's way of trying to win me back. But was it really? I understood Julian's temper too well. If any other employee had made a mistake like that, they wouldn't just be transferred; they would be fired immediately. Lily was merely "transferred." It proved he was still protecting her. 11 Thinking back to the day of the recording, when I pulled out the divorce papers. Julian refused to sign. I couldn't guess what he was thinking either. I decided to send a text to rush him. "Mr. Sterling, once you've filled out the divorce agreement, please send it to me so we can pick a date to finalize the paperwork." Julian called me directly. "Letty, haven't you caused enough of a scene?" Letty was my childhood nickname. When I was little and my speech was still clumsy, I used to mispronounce "Scarlett" as "Scary-Letty", so my mom gave me the nickname Letty. Julian had always known this nickname. But this was the first time he ever used it. "I am very firm on the divorce. Please hurry up, Mr. Sterling. Don't delay me from finding my next partner." "Next partner?" Julian practically laughed in anger. "The status and resources you dreamed of, I gave them all to you. Who else are you looking for? Letty, you are my first, and you will be my last. I've never been good at sweet-talking girls, but I can guarantee that as long as you want it, the position of Mrs. Sterling is yours forever. No one can take it away!" I said, "But what I dreamed of was never those things." Julian seemed to freeze. "Even now, you still don't know what I truly wanted... But it doesn't matter. I don't want it anymore." With that, I hung up. My best friend, Chloe, also worked at the agency. She told me Julian had been radiating a very dark aura the past few days and was constantly spacing out during meetings. Chloe said, "Everyone is whispering privately, saying you can't bear to leave Mr. Sterling and that you'll come crawling back sooner or later. It seems... Mr. Sterling believes it too." No wonder. Since I asked for a divorce, Julian had been contacting me proactively every day. But for the last three days, he had gone back to being aloof and cold. So he was waiting for me to yield and beg. Then I'd just have to give him exactly what he wanted. That Friday, I voluntarily showed up at the company. When Julian saw me, his eyes lit up. "Letty, have you thought it through?" "I have." I slammed a stack of documents onto his desk. "I don't just want a divorce. I also want to terminate my contract." 12 I had signed a five-year contract with the agency. This year marked exactly the fifth year. I chose not to renew. Julian looked at me in disbelief. He asked through gritted teeth, "Are you sure about this?" "Yes." "Have you already found a new agency?" I didn't know which new agency he was talking about. But I still replied with a "Yes." My attitude infuriated him. He hesitated no longer, picking up his pen and signing both documents. Except, he pressed so hard he nearly tore through the paper. With the divorce agreement signed, the rest of the process was very simple. The day I got my divorce certificate, I felt incredibly relieved. This one-sided love I had clung to for seven years was finally over. I was admiring the red booklet when I heard Julian say: "Remember, today is the day you gave up everything the Sterling family has to offer." "Oh, don't worry. I won't regret it." "I hope so." His tone was as cold as ice, but when he looked up, I noticed. The rims of his eyes were red. 13 Whether his eyes were red or not had nothing to do with me anymore. I threw myself into my new life without stopping to breathe. Of course, saying I wasn't sad at all would be a lie. After all, I had liked him so much, tried so hard to get close to him. But waking up only takes a single moment. My sadness was only because I felt I hadn't valued my own worth. The Sterling family had sponsored me once, but considering the money I made for them over the years, I had more than repaid that debt. A few days later, Chloe told me she had quit too. "Letty, if you're leaving, I'm leaving. Men are unreliable. Your best friend is here for you!" I was so touched I almost cried. Chloe had worked behind the scenes for years and was highly capable. We decided to set up our own independent studio. Setting up a studio takes time. In the meantime, I participated in a variety show recording. It was a nostalgic, sentimental talk show. The guests had to bring a few old items and reminisce about the past. After agonizing over it, I decided to bring my old backpack. It was the backpack I carried during the year I repeated my senior year. It held a lot of memories. On the day of filming, Julian showed up. It wasn't that surprising. I had accepted this job while still under my old agency, and besides me, a rookie groomed by his company was also on the show. Julian liked to oversee things personally and had come to smooth things over with the production crew. He stood behind the camera crew, his eyes fixed on me. I just acted like I didn't see him. Halfway through filming, it was my turn to present. I opened my backpack and pulled things out one by one. "This is a gel pen. You know how senior year is—doing endless practice tests, I'd go through a pen every two or three days. "Oh, and this. The Princeton Review SAT prep book. I'm sure everyone has done these? I call it a nightmare. "This is my mistake notebook. I have piles of notebooks just like this." "And this—" I suddenly stopped. The last item was a yellowed, slightly worn diary. It used to be my most loyal listener. During the hardest and most exhausting times of senior year, writing in my diary was my only way to de-stress. My long silence sparked the curiosity of the guest sitting next to me. "Are there secrets in this thick notebook? You have to play by the rules, no hiding things!" She took my diary and flipped it open. [September 2016. The teacher said the intensity of the repeat class is very high, and many students can't handle it. But I have to endure it, because I need to go see Julian Sterling.] She froze. The entire studio fell silent. 14 [November 2016. The monthly exams are over. My grades were bad. I feel terrible. But Julian said I absolutely must study. Let me go do a few more practice problems.] [December 2016. Saw an article about Julian. I cut it out. He's so amazing, I need to work even harder.] [February 2017. In New York for my acting audition. It snowed. I sat downstairs at Julian's company for a while, then got up and went to the exam. After I got up, the snow covered the bench where I sat, as if I had never been there at all.] [June 2017. Tomorrow is the SATs. Julian, wait for me!] [June 2017. I got accepted!!! I'm so happy! I left a comment under Julian's post, but he probably doesn't read his comments.] [August 2017. Let me dream a little. If, I'm just saying if, I can actually be with Julian in the future, I will definitely tell him every single day right in his ear that I like him!] ... The paper was mottled, every stroke and line revealing the most sincere secrets of a young girl's heart. All the guests looked at me. I explained briefly about my one-sided encounter with Julian when I was eighteen. Then I smiled and said, "Having a crush on someone when you're young is just like that, you know." A female guest sighed. "Then after you married Mr. Sterling, did you really tell him how you felt every single day?" "I really did. "I told him every single day that I liked him, it's just—" It's just that he thought my confession was just fake affection aimed at securing my status. It's just that, after hearing it, he would reply coldly: "Are you trying to convince yourself of that lie too?" I lowered my eyes. All the past events, everything we went through, had finally dissolved into relief. I opened my lips and smiled softly: "It's just that, he never believed it." Behind the stage lights. Julian stared at me in absolute disbelief.
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