After my husband's first love returned, I saw his answer to a question on Reddit: "What is it like to marry someone you don't love?" He wrote that he didn't love his wife. Even though she gave him her whole heart and took perfect care of their home, his mind was still constantly on his ex-girlfriend. He knew it wasn't right, but he couldn't help it. Someone in the comments asked: "You didn't even use a throwaway account. Aren't you afraid your wife will see this and divorce you?" He replied: "No, she can't live without me." What he didn't expect was that the very next day, I left the divorce papers on his nightstand and quietly walked out of his life. 1 After Sarah Davis came back, I discovered Liam's answer on Reddit. What is it like to marry someone you don't love? He didn't use a throwaway account, and his profile picture was still a photo of Sarah's back. "I guess it feels like life is just a pool of stagnant water." "I don't love my wife. After my first love and I broke up, my family pressured me to get married quickly. I was heartbroken then, and I felt like as long as it wasn't her, marrying anyone else would be exactly the same." "It just so happened that my wife had always liked me. We'd known each other for a long time, we knew each other's backgrounds well, so I proposed to her." "I still remember how she cried tears of joy that day, constantly asking me if she was dreaming. Honestly, I felt pretty guilty. All these years, she's been completely devoted to me, taking perfect care of everything at home, big or small." My fingers trembled slightly as I continued to scroll down. He wrote: "But I don't love her. All these years, I've always had my first love in my heart." "I know it makes me a jerk, and I've tried to love her, but I really just can't." Someone commented below: "You didn't even use a throwaway. Aren't you afraid your wife will see this and divorce you?" His tone was as confident as ever: "She won't. She can't live without me." It felt like a thorn that had been buried in my heart for years. Its sharp edges had been worn smooth by my own flesh and blood, so it didn't pierce me with that sharp, stabbing pain like it used to. But there was still a constant, dull ache that I couldn't ignore. I let out a bitter laugh. Look how well he knows me. Even at this point, he knew I couldn't live without him. 2 That night, Liam acted exactly the same as always. We were like a couple strictly adhering to the formalities of marriage. He praised the dinner I made with the enthusiasm of completing a routine task, then got into bed, turned his back to me, and started looking at his phone. A king-size bed isn't that big, but with our backs to each other, it felt like there was a vast, uncrossable chasm between us. I suddenly remembered the day he proposed to me. He thought I was crying tears of joy, but he didn't know that at that moment, my heart was filled with nothing but sorrow. He and Sarah Davis were together for a full seven years, from seventeen to twenty-four. They shared the best years of their lives, watching each other grow from awkward teenagers into adults. After graduating from college, Sarah wanted to pursue a master's degree abroad and got an offer from her dream university in London. But Liam's father was severely ill at the time, and he was required to take over the family business and stay in the US. Long-distance relationships rarely have good endings. They tried to make it work at first, but the distance and time difference bred countless problems, leaving them with less and less time to communicate. Coupled with the fact that Liam had just taken over the company and was working himself to the bone every day, Sarah, alone in a foreign country, realized that whenever she needed him, he was never there. The arguments grew more frequent. Finally, during a fight a year later, the conflict completely exploded, and Sarah impulsively broke up with him. Things could have been salvaged then. But both of them were used to being the best in their circles, proud and stubborn, and neither was willing to bow their head. Liam's father had just passed away, and he was consumed by grief, unable to deal with the breakup properly. In the end, they drifted further and further apart. But I knew he never let go of Sarah in his heart. Actually, when he proposed to me, I knew he didn't love me. He was just overwhelmed and confused, wanting to find someone to get the whole marriage thing over with. I happened to be the best candidate on paper, so he carelessly chose me. I understood all of this. But the saddest part was that even knowing all this, when he casually presented a ring his secretary had bought to propose, I still couldn't resist saying yes. I cried so much that day I couldn't even wipe the tears away fast enough. He thought I was crying from happiness, but in reality, I was just heartbroken. Heartbroken because I knew he didn't love me. But I could only love him. 3 I don't know if it was intentional or a coincidence, but right after Sarah returned, the class president organized a college reunion. After three years, Sarah was even more beautiful than before. Wearing a Morandi-colored long dress, her long hair cascading down like seaweed, she looked effortless and elegant. But from the moment he walked through the door, Liam didn't spare her a single glance. Instead, he attentively sat next to me and served me food. At home, he had never peeled a shrimp for me, but now he thoughtfully placed a peeled shrimp in my bowl, smiling gently: "Eat some more." Across the table, Sarah paused, the smile slowly fading from her face. I suddenly found it all a bit ridiculous. In this play that seemed to feature three people, they were the lead actors pouring their hearts into the performance, while I was just the ugly clown, unqualified to even be on stage, watching coldly from the sidelines. After a few rounds of drinks, a balding male classmate who had had a bit too much laughed drunkenly at Sarah: "Sarah, how come you're even prettier than before? Do you have a boyfriend now? If not, would you consider me?" In my peripheral vision, I saw Liam stiffen. Sarah smiled: "I don't, but I don't think we're a good match." "Why aren't we a good match?" The balding guy, feeling humiliated by the rejection, started spouting nonsense. "Are you still thinking about Liam, planning to save yourself for him?" "He's already married! Let me tell you, it's not easy for a woman to find a guy after twenty-five. Do you still think you're some fairy princess?" Sarah's smile faltered: "You've had too much to drink." Another female classmate, who clearly loved drama, pulled out her phone: "Who knows, maybe the feeling is mutual. When I was scrolling through Reddit the other day, I saw Liam answered a question about what it's like to marry someone you don't love." "Sarah, the photo he used is of you and Liam, right? You still have that photo on your Instagram!" Hearing there was drama, all the classmates pulled out their phones. "Where is it?" Even Sarah, when she saw the answer, looked at Liam with a complex expression, her eyes welling up slightly. Liam stared back at her. My whole body went cold, and I started trembling almost uncontrollably. Under the watchful eyes of everyone, they all knew that the woman my husband loved was actually someone else. In that instant, I felt as if I had been stripped naked and paraded through the streets. I desperately wanted to stand up and run away! After a long time, Liam finally spoke. His voice sounded normal, but if you listened closely, you could detect a slight tremor: "I was just writing nonsense. My wife and I are doing great. Let's eat." The classmates nodded and put their phones away, but for the rest of the meal, I could feel countless eyes resting on me. The only things directed at me were pity and mockery. That was probably the most difficult meal I've ever eaten in my life. As the gathering was winding down, Liam threw out a quick "I'm going to the restroom" and stood up to leave. Not long after, Sarah also went out. Quite a few people looked at me, intentionally or not. I didn't know what I was feeling anymore. I could only pretend nothing had happened and mechanically continue to eat with my head down. After the dinner, all the classmates left. I waited for a long time, but Liam didn't return, so I got up to leave. But as I walked through the hallway, I suddenly heard Sarah's tearful voice. I looked over from the shadows. I saw Sarah hugging Liam from behind, crying: "But you clearly still have me in your heart!" Liam frowned: "You're overthinking it. I'm already married." Sarah, in tears, said: "Then why don't you dare look back at me?" "What did your answer say? Liam, you clearly don't love her!" She sobbed softly: "I know it's not right, but we were together first." "If it weren't for her, maybe we would have made up a long time ago... Liam, I came back just for you. I was immature before, let's start over, okay?" Liam's body was rigid, his expression obscured by the shadows. After a long time, he turned around inch by inch and pulled Sarah into a tight embrace. The two of them kissed almost frantically in the deserted hallway, as if trying to release all the suppressed emotions of the past few years! And I just watched silently from the side, letting the blade tear my heart to shreds. I don't know why, but even though they were the ones being intimate, I was the one who fled in a panic. When I finally ran under a dim streetlamp and touched my face, I realized that at some point, my face had become covered in a damp, icy wetness. 4 That night, Liam came home very late. He seemed to want to explain something to me. He opened his mouth, then closed it, not knowing what to say. I smiled like I usually did: "Get some rest first, we can talk later." He relaxed his furrowed brow, as if relieved of a heavy burden. When I grabbed a blanket and headed to the guest bedroom, he only paused for a moment and didn't try to stop me. Late at night, I opened Reddit. There were a lot more comments under Liam's answer, probably all from the classmates who were at the dinner tonight. And his reply remained that same sentence: "She won't. She can't live without me." The night sky outside the window cast shifting shadows through the fog, and the sheer curtains billowed in the wind. I sat up and pulled a divorce agreement from the drawer. Over the years, even though Liam didn't love me, he could still be considered a good husband. He handed over all his salary and dividends to me. Actually, over the past year, he had started to change slowly. He would kiss me before leaving the house, and he would nuzzle against me during intimate moments before bed, softly calling my nickname. When I couldn't sleep because of cramps, he would rub his hands together to warm them and then massage my stomach. There were several times I woke up in the middle of the night and found him nodding off from exhaustion, but his hands never stopped moving. At those times, I thought he was going to fall in love with me. But when Sarah came back, I realized that it was all just an illusion. I divided the money I had saved over the years into two equal halves, signed the divorce agreement, quietly placed it on the coffee table, and then, dragging my suitcase, I gently closed the door and left. Then, I left a reply under Liam's answer: "No, she will leave too." 5 Liam didn't call me until the afternoon of the next day. He had probably been busy tangled up with Sarah and only just saw the divorce agreement I left behind. "What is the meaning of this?" Liam demanded, suppressing his anger. "Mia, are you asking me for a divorce?" I stayed silent for a moment, then said softly, "Yes. Sign the agreement, and let me know when you have time so we can go finalize the paperwork." "Don't worry, I didn't take any more than what's mine. The house and the car are yours, but—" I didn't get to finish before Liam angrily cut me off: "That's enough! Is it really necessary to go this far just because of what happened last night?" His voice carried a hint of mockery: "Aren't you just mad that I wrote that answer? Yes, I wrote it, and it was wrong of me, but haven't I told you that I hate being threatened? If you think this will—" "I know," I interrupted him, not waiting for him to finish. "That's why I'm serious." "Liam," I fought back the stinging sensation in my nose, "I saw you two in the hallway last night." Liam choked, completely speechless. He grew anxious and tried to explain: "No, it's not like that, listen to me—" My voice broke: "Liam, what exactly was going through your mind when you wrote that answer? When you were trampling on my feelings, were you standing on the sidelines watching me like a joke, thinking I was an absolute idiot?" "Is loving you really that worthless in your eyes?" For once, Liam actually panicked. He stammered out a few sentences: "I didn't mean it like that. I was just drunk that day and wrote some nonsense. Mia, please don't overthink this!" Overthink? I pulled a bitter smile. He had already spelled it out so clearly, what room was there left for me to "overthink"? I tilted my head up to stop the tears from falling. "Liam, let's get a divorce!" ... During that phone call, Liam stubbornly refused to divorce me. He just told me to think about it some more. I didn't care. If it came down to it, I would just file a lawsuit. The worst-case scenario was living apart for the required time before the court would grant it. It just meant enduring a bit longer. I could tolerate him not loving me, but I couldn't tolerate him trampling on my feelings so callously. Perhaps it was a case of "when it rains, it pours." A few days later, while I was leaving work, a sudden torrential downpour started. Visibility was terrible, the car in front of me suddenly braked, and the Uber I was in rear-ended it hard. My lower abdomen slammed violently into the metal corner of the laptop I was holding, and my forehead hit the window. The pain was so intense my vision went black, and my ears instantly started ringing! After being rushed to the hospital and examined, the doctor frowned slightly: "Why weren't you more careful when you're pregnant? You already had signs of a threatened miscarriage, and you almost lost the baby!" I was stunned. A baby? Seeing my reaction, the doctor looked puzzled: "Don't tell me you didn't know you were pregnant?" I nodded, dazedly touching my lower abdomen. It was flat, with no sign of movement. I couldn't imagine that a tiny life, connected to me by blood, was already growing in there. My mind was a tangled mess, and I bit my lip. What a... twisted fate. In all the years I was with Liam, I had wanted a child so badly. Back then, I always felt a child could tie his heart to me. Because I pestered him about it constantly, he even scolded me: "Do you have no shame at all?!" Even so, I never managed to get pregnant. I couldn't help but laugh bitterly. Now that we were getting a divorce, it had shown up at the most inopportune time. The wound on my head was throbbing, and I felt a bit nauseous. The doctor checked again and said, "We can't rule out a concussion. You need to be admitted for observation. By the way, in your condition, you still need someone to look after you. Have your family member go pay the bill when they arrive." I pursed my lips. After some thought, I sent a text to Liam. When he didn't reply, I called him. It was pretty embarrassing. I had just boldly declared I wanted a divorce, and now I was calling him right away. But I had moved far away to marry him. I didn't have any relatives or close friends in this city. He was the only one I could call. The phone rang for a long time before it connected. I could hear faint music and voices in the background. I fought through the headache and said hoarsely: "Liam, can you come be with me? I'm at the hospital. I was in a car accident." Liam mocked me coldly: "Mia, can't you make up a decent excuse?" "I didn't—" He cut me off: "Weren't you acting all tough yesterday, screaming about getting a divorce? What, regretting it already?" I heard Sarah's voice from his end: "Liam, come here!" Before hanging up, Liam left me with a sneer: "Mia, I really look down on you." Then came the cold, electronic dial tone. I stared blankly at my phone, feeling like my heart had stopped beating. The headache and stomach pain slowly faded away. The only thing I could feel was the delayed, dull ache in my heart. The doctor continued: "You'll need a progesterone shot soon. The pregnancy wasn't very stable to begin with, and if this continues, it'll be hard to keep the baby. You—" I looked up and said numbly, "There's no need. This baby... I don't want it." "You want to abort it?" After a moment's pause, I nodded. The tip of my tongue felt bitter and numb, but I still managed to force the words out: "Yes, I want to abort this baby." 6 Because my condition wasn't good on the first day, the doctor scheduled the procedure for the next day. Before the surgery, I opened my phone and saw a post Sarah had made on Instagram. In the revolving restaurant at the top of the TV tower, she was making a wish in front of a cake. Liam was looking at her tenderly from the side, his face full of smiles. The caption read: "May you be by my side every year from now on." A sharp cramp shot through my lower abdomen, and the pain quickly spread through my entire body. I couldn't help but curl up slightly, gripping the railing of the hospital bed. No wonder he refused to come see me. It turned out he was busy celebrating Sarah's birthday. The birthday of the woman he loved was, of course, far more important than his unloved wife. The doctor walked over: "You still need to sign the consent form. Is your family member not here yet?" My eyes felt dry. They stung terribly, but I couldn't shed a single tear. I suppose I had already cried all my tears. I opened my mouth: "I don't have any family." "Doctor, I'll sign it myself." ... An abortion isn't considered major surgery. Under anesthesia, I didn't feel a thing. Even after getting off the operating table, I didn't feel much discomfort. I just felt incredibly empty, as if a part of my body had vanished. Between the car accident and the miscarriage, I took half a month off work to recover at home. Once I was feeling a bit better, I went downstairs to buy some food I liked and cooked for myself at home to pass the time. I had to find things to do, otherwise the emptiness would swallow me whole. I went to a supermarket I used to frequent, but while I was picking out beef, I heard a grating voice from behind me: "Isn't that Mia? You're actually grocery shopping?" I turned around. Sarah was holding onto Liam's arm, smirking and asking a question she already knew the answer to. "Why are you alone?" I didn't want to say a single word to her. I turned and prepared to leave. But my wrist was grabbed tightly. Liam looked at the bandage on my leg, his brow furrowed deeply: "You're injured?" I mocked him: "It's only been a few days and you already forgot? Mr. Sterling, you're quite young to be suffering from dementia, aren't you?" "That day—" Liam seemed momentarily stunned, "I thought you were lying to me." I laughed: "Mr. Sterling was too busy celebrating someone else's birthday, of course you didn't have time to come over. But since we're getting a divorce anyway, you're free to be with whoever you want. It's none of my business." Liam's brow tightened, and he looked at me in astonishment. I had never spoken to him like this before. However, perhaps feeling guilty, he patiently tried to explain: "No, that day—" I watched him grab my hand, and violently shook him off! "Get lost!" I said coldly. "Liam, just hearing you speak makes me sick!" I didn't want to look at his face anymore, which only caused me pain, and I turned to leave. Liam stared at me in shock from behind, the words he was about to say ultimately left unspoken. When I got home that evening, I received a WeChat message from Liam. He hadn't messaged me in a very long time. Scrolling up, the chat history was almost entirely messages I had sent. "Are you coming home for dinner tonight? I made your favorite sweet and sour pork~" "I saw a really pretty stray cat on the street today, its eyes look a bit like yours, hahahaha [Image]." ... The very last message was the one I sent from the hospital that day: "I was in a car accident, can you come be with me?" He never replied. Leaving me alone, foolishly performing a one-woman show. Today, he had broken his usual pattern and messaged me. Liam explained: "Sarah said she didn't have anyone to celebrate her birthday with since she just got back to the country, so she asked me to go. There's nothing going on between us, don't misunderstand." I don't know what got into him, but for the first time, he actually yielded to me. "It was my fault I didn't go to the hospital to be with you that day. It won't happen again." I suddenly found it utterly laughable. Being with Liam, it seemed everything I did was wrong. I wasn't the right person, the timing was wrong, everything was wrong. When I desperately wanted a baby, I couldn't get pregnant. But when we were about to divorce, it arrived, and the only option was to abort it. I waited so long for his explanation, and when it never came, I no longer needed it. Yet now, he was throwing himself at me. How absurd. It seems we were never meant to be. Before, I forced it, and now I was finally tasting the bitter fruit of my own stubbornness.
? Continue the story here ?? ? Download the "MotoNovel" app ? search for "436701", and watch the full series ✨! #MotoNovel