Five years ago, I stayed in Europe to study medicine just for him. He said he would wait for me, that he wouldn't marry anyone else in this lifetime. Five years later, when I returned home with a treatment plan I had painstakingly researched, he was eating a rich cheese pastry fed to him by another woman. 1 Rowan Hayes had always been a quiet, aloof person. Partly because he was naturally introverted, and partly because he had suffered from a chronic illness since childhood, meaning intense emotional fluctuations were dangerous for him. Having grown up with him, I knew this better than anyone. So, when I saw the smile reaching his eyes as he looked at Lily Evans, a deep sense of unease settled in my chest. I hadn't changed my flight to come home early just to watch this scene unfold. Rowan and Lily were sitting on a bench in the courtyard of his villa. Lily was holding a piece of cheese pastry right up to Rowan’s lips, looking eager. Though Rowan was frowning slightly, his body language showed no sign of pulling away. In fact, a faint smile was creeping onto his lips as he watched her playful, impulsive behavior. "Rowan." I called out softly. One second he was opening his mouth to take a bite, and the next, he whipped his head around, staring at me in disbelief. His eyes overflowed with confusion, joy, shock, and a sliver of panic. "Harper!" Before I could even react, Rowan had crossed the distance and pulled me into a tight embrace. He leaned down, holding me tighter and tighter. I could feel his emotions rushing toward me like a flood. For five years, his embrace was what I had missed the most. The joy of our reunion momentarily took over, making me briefly forget the uncomfortable scene I had just witnessed. "Harper, it's been five years. You're finally back..." "I missed you so much I thought I’d go crazy!" Rowan’s voice was hoarse. Though his face rarely showed much emotion, the burning intensity in his eyes made me blush. He rarely got this worked up, but right now, the hands gripping my shoulders were trembling violently. "Yeah, I'm back." Afraid he might lose control, I reached out and stroked the back of his hand to soothe him. I had to admit, I loved it when Rowan showed emotion because of me. Whenever he did, his love for me spilled over without reservation. But mild emotional fluctuations were fine; anything too intense, and I worried it would trigger his illness. As Rowan and I gazed deeply at each other, lost in the moment, I finally noticed Lily. She had stood up from the bench and walked over to stand beside him. I was instantly reminded of their intimate interaction just moments ago. "Rowan, who is this?" It was only when I asked the question that I realized the woman standing in front of me looked incredibly similar to me. So similar, in fact, that even I might have mistaken her for my own sister at first glance. It clicked instantly. During the five years I was gone, Rowan had found a knockoff to keep him company. The atmosphere instantly dropped below freezing. Rowan seemed to realize that letting me see Lily wasn't a good thing. He shot me a panicked look but still opened his mouth to explain. "Harper, her name is Lily Evans. She's a pre-med student at State University. A student I sponsored three years ago." Three years ago? Now that he mentioned it, I had a vague memory of it. He had brought it up in passing during a FaceTime call back then. But he never mentioned that this Lily Evans looked so much like me. "You sponsor a student, and now she’s sponsored all the way into your house?" My tone was entirely flat, but a heavy stone was definitely lodging itself in my chest. "It's not like that, Harper..." Rowan was visibly panicking. He grabbed my hand to explain, "She just came to drop something off today." I glanced at the open box on the patio table. Several individually wrapped pastries were scattered around it. "Yes... because my paper won an award, my professor gave them to me. Please don't misunderstand." Lily kept her head down, seemingly afraid to look at me, but she still stammered out an explanation. "I've never had this kind of pastry before, and I figured Mr. Hayes probably hadn't either, so I brought them over as a small thank-you gift..." Her voice got quieter and quieter until I couldn't hear the rest. Rowan was the CEO of a publicly traded company. Who in their right mind would think there was an expensive pastry out there he hadn't seen before? "Harper, it's true. I wouldn't lie to you." Rowan lowered his eyes. Paired with his sharp, aristocratic nose, he really was handsome. Sweat was pooling in his palms as he held my hand; I could tell he was incredibly tense. I didn't want to put too much strain on his heart. "Alright, I believe you." I forced a relaxed smile. "But Rowan, you should avoid eating high-cholesterol foods like cheese pastries. Your condition has finally stabilized a bit these past few years. I don't want you getting sick again." Seeing that I wasn't angry, the tension between Rowan's brows finally smoothed out. He turned to look at Lily. A complex emotion flashed through his eyes, but he quickly returned to normal, using the cold tone he reserved for outsiders. "It's getting late. You can go back now." Lily's head snapped up. She looked at him in disbelief, her expression slowly shifting to crushing disappointment. "But the pastries..." "Miss Evans, what's your specialty at the medical university?" Hearing my random question, both of them looked at me in confusion. Lily pressed her lips together and whispered, "Cardiology." "Then you should know that patients with IPAH shouldn't consume foods high in cholesterol, right?" Lily stared at me blankly for a moment before something seemed to click. Looking utterly defeated, she turned back to pack up the pastries on the table, putting them in her bag one by one. "I'm sorry... I'll take my leave now." As she brushed past me, I noticed her lift a hand to wipe away tears. Winning an award for a paper, yet not even knowing that IPAH patients can't eat high-cholesterol foods? The academic standards at State University really seemed to be slipping. "Rowan, since I'm back this time..." I was just about to tell him that I had fully graduated and didn't need to leave again. But when I looked up, I saw him staring blankly in the direction Lily had gone. My heart sank. I didn't finish my sentence. I grabbed the handle of my suitcase and walked straight into the house. When Rowan snapped out of it and realized I was already walking ahead, he recognized his slip-up. Looking guilty, he rushed forward and grabbed my suitcase. "Harper, let me get that!" I didn't fight him for it. The suitcase wasn't that heavy anyway. We walked into the house in silence, right up until the housekeeper, Maria, greeted us at the door with a beaming smile. She didn't know what had just transpired outside in those few short minutes, but she could probably guess who it was about. Because there was no way I believed Lily had only come to the Hayes estate today. Today's little drama was quite the "surprise" to come home to. 2 "Harper, what happened today wasn't what you thought." During dinner that evening, Rowan was the first to break the silence. "She really is just a student I sponsored. That's all." Rowan looked up at me, his eyes pleading. "Please don't be angry because of her, okay?" "What's with her face?" I asked. "I leave home for five years, and when I come back, I find you two acting intimately, sharing food. And it was food I explicitly warned you not to eat. Do you expect me not to be mad?" My tone was harsh. It was then that Rowan realized I wasn't just throwing a petty tantrum. Panic seized him, and after a long moment, he leaned over and grasped my wrist. "Harper, I admit, I sponsored her through college because she looks so much like you. I didn't tell you because I was afraid you'd overthink it. But there is absolutely nothing going on between Lily and me." "Rowan, let me ask you something. If I hadn't spoken up to stop you today, would you have eaten that pastry from her hand?" I stared stubbornly into his eyes. His eyes were as dark as ink; anyone looking into them would be involuntarily drawn in. But looking at them now, I just wanted to cry. Hearing my voice crack, Rowan's expression finally broke. His eyes filled with heartache as he pulled me into his arms. "I'm so sorry, Harper. I was wrong. Please don't cry, okay..." "You're unbelievable, Rowan. Who do you think I went to Europe for? Who do you think I went to medical school for? Do you know how hard med school is? And what's the first thing I see when I get back! I see you eating some cheap pastry she gave you..." He coaxed me softly in my ear, but I was like a broken dam. The tears wouldn't stop flowing. It was as if I wanted to pour out all the grievances of the last five years at once. Rowan clumsily tried to kiss me, but I pushed him away. He resorted to gently wiping my tears with his thumbs. This was the tenderness he never showed anyone else, a tenderness that belonged only to me. I don't know how long I cried. I cried until I was dizzy, and Rowan carried me to the bathroom to wash my face, then laid me down on the soft bed. "Harper..." Rowan propped himself up to kiss me. I caught the faint scent of cedarwood on him. It was intoxicating. "Rowan..." I pushed against his chest as he leaned in. "Are you thinking about something you shouldn't be?" "..." Rowan's ears instantly turned bright red, and he turned his head away, too embarrassed to look at me. But that put my mind at ease. He was still the same Rowan. The Rowan who looked cold and arrogant to the world, but turned into a blushing mess whenever it came to me. I looped my arms around his neck and kissed him gently. What I got in return was a deep kiss that was anything but hesitant. It had been five years. We had both waited too long for this day. After that, we didn't bring up Lily Evans again. We settled into the Hayes estate, picking up the life we had planned five years ago. Unfortunately, the peaceful days didn't last long. Not long after I started my residency at the city hospital, Rowan's old symptoms suddenly flared up. Shortness of breath, tachycardia. He collapsed in the underground parking lot of his company. When he was rushed to the hospital, I was in the middle of a heated debate at a medical conference with a senior professor. By the time the conference ended in the afternoon, I finally heard that an emergency patient had been brought in that morning. However, the first person I saw wasn't Rowan in his hospital bed, but Lily Evans, pacing anxiously outside his room. Hearing my footsteps, she looked over joyfully, but when she realized it was me, the light in her eyes died. I had to admit, seeing her face was still jarring. It was like looking into a blurred mirror. But I didn't have time to deal with her right now. I walked past her straight into the room. Nurse Sarah was monitoring Rowan's blood pressure. "Dr. Brooks..." "How is the patient? Has he regained consciousness since he was brought in this morning?" I asked. "Not yet. But after putting him on oxygen, his blood pressure and oxygen saturation have returned to normal." Looking at Rowan lying in the hospital bed with an oxygen mask, my heart ached terribly. "He's stable for now. You can go back to your duties, Sarah. I'll take care of him here." I gave her a faint smile. Sarah nodded, but before leaving, she hesitated and glanced at me. "Is there a problem?" Was there another symptom they hadn't told me about? "Dr. Brooks, I know it's not my place, but that girl at the door has been standing there for a long time. Is she your sister?" I subconsciously looked toward the door. Sure enough, Lily was still standing there. Who exactly was keeping her from coming in? I smiled bitterly and shook my head. Sarah didn't ask any more questions and left. Rowan lay on the bed. Even though his vitals were stable, he just wouldn't wake up. It reminded me of a rainy night six years ago when Rowan had collapsed without warning just like this. That was when I first learned about Idiopathic Pulmonary Arterial Hypertension (IPAH). There was no absolute cure for it, which was why I made the firm decision to go to Switzerland, where some of the most advanced research on the disease was happening. "Didn't I tell you to leave? Why are you still standing here like a pole?" "Mr. Miller, please just let me go in and see him. I'm really worried about him..." "Worried my ass. Who do you think you are? Get lost, go on, shoo! You're blocking the doorway!" "Mr. Miller..." "Stop yelling! This is a hospital ward. Take it outside..." Hearing the commotion, I walked over and saw Lily arguing with a man holding a bouquet and a fruit basket. "Harper Brooks?" The man's shocked voice made me turn to look at him. Thick eyebrows, big eyes, dyed blonde hair, wearing a black jacket covered in straps and chains. That flashy, avant-garde style, combined with that face... "Chase... Chase Miller?" "Ha! You remember! Five years and I thought you forgot about me! When did you get back? I bumped into Rowan passed out in the parking lot this morning and brought him in. Anyway, how is he? Is he awake?" His rapid-fire questions almost transported me back to our exhausting high school days. I smiled helplessly and stepped aside to let him in. "Go see for yourself..." I said. "Miss Brooks, please let me in too. Just one look at Mr. Hayes, just one... I'm so worried..." Before Chase could respond, Lily grabbed my arm. Her eyes were filled with tears as she begged, drawing the attention of passing patients and nurses. Lily was pretty (I mean, not to be narcissistic). Even though we looked alike, she possessed a pitiful, fragile aura that I completely lacked. Crying like that, it made it look as though I was the cold-hearted villain bullying her. "Tsk, what is wrong with you?" Chase said. "You're not family, you're not a friend. Why should we let you visit? Besides, aren't you a student? Rowan pays for your tuition, and you skip a whole day of classes on his dime? Get out of here. If you hang around any longer, it'll be dark, your dorm will be locked, and you won't even be able to get back!" Chase's rapid-fire delivery and sharp tongue made me wonder if he shouldn't have majored in debate instead of art. Lily's face turned beet red. Faced with his humiliation, she fought hard to keep her tears from falling. Chase shot me a triumphant smirk. I shook my head helplessly. "Har... Harper..." Rowan's weak voice came from the hospital room. I immediately rushed back inside. Rowan was awake. He looked around in confusion until he saw me, then realized what had happened. "Did I have another episode?" A bitter smile touched his lips. My heart throbbed with pain. I lowered my eyes, trying to hide the tears welling up. "It's okay. You'll be fine," I comforted him, though I was also comforting myself. "Alright, he's awake. You can stop worrying now. Hurry up and leave, do you have zero situational awareness?" Chase's voice drifted in from the hallway, followed by the sound of Lily walking away, sobbing. "What's going on outside?" Rowan asked. "It's Chase. He's the one who brought you to the hospital," I paused. "And Lily Evans." Rowan didn't say anything else, but the fleeting look of emotion in his eyes still stung me. It seemed this matter was far from over. 3 "How is Rowan doing? Why did he suddenly have an episode?" Shortly after waking up, Rowan fell back asleep. Chase pulled me out into the hallway and asked quietly. "There's still no case of his disease being completely cured," I sighed. "With current medical technology, we can only rely on medication to stabilize his condition... When you found him, was there anyone else with him?" Chase hesitated, looking at me as if he wanted to say something but couldn't. "Lily Evans?" He nodded. I knew it. "Uh, but don't overthink it. She's been staking out his office building for a long time. She just happened to catch him today." "You're really good at making excuses for your bro," I complained, feigning anger. Chase panicked. "Tsk, I'm definitely on your side! Didn't you see me roast that Lily girl until she was speechless just now?" The image of Chase arguing with our high school principal suddenly popped into my head. I laughed. "Alright, seriously though, thank you so much for today. I owe you a dinner." Chase grinned, scratching his head awkwardly. "It was nothing... but since you're offering, I won't say no!" I waved at him helplessly as he left. However, just as I saw Chase off and turned to head back to the room, I saw Lily standing pitifully off to the side. Didn't she leave? She really pulled a fast one on me. "Do you need something?" I asked her expressionlessly. "Miss Brooks..." Lily's eyes were red, like a rabbit's. "I'm sorry." "Sorry for what?" "I..." Like someone who had been holding back grievances for a long time and finally snapped, Lily suddenly covered her face and burst into loud sobs. "It's all my fault. I said things that upset Mr. Hayes. I made him sick. If it weren't for me... if it weren't for me, he wouldn't have collapsed... It's all my fault..." My mind went completely blank. "What did you say to him?" I tried my best to suppress my emotions, not wanting her to notice anything off about me. Lily rubbed her red eyes. "I came today to say goodbye to Mr. Hayes. I wanted to go back to my hometown. My relatives found a pretty good match for me to marry, and then... he got so angry he yelled at me, and then he collapsed from the stress..." I didn't know what to say for a moment. In my memory, Rowan rarely got sick because of emotional fluctuations. "Miss Evans, you don't need to cry." I smiled faintly. "Rowan probably had an episode because he inhaled fumes. It was an underground parking garage, after all. There's a lot of exhaust. "But Miss Evans, what you said is infuriating. Rowan sponsored your education for so many years, and you want to drop out to go back and get married? Isn't that making all his efforts a waste? You should focus on your studies and not let us down." Probably not expecting such a calm reaction from me, Lily looked up, staring at me in shock. I put on a look of concern. "Is it your relatives forcing you to go back and get married? Do you need me to introduce you to a lawyer?" Lily froze for a moment, then forced a smile. "No, no need." I didn't say anything more to her and turned back into the hospital room. Rowan was still sleeping, his breathing even. But I felt like I was suffocating. I had never doubted Rowan's feelings for me. After all, we had known each other for twenty-two years. We were childhood sweethearts, having met when we were four. In my memory, before he turned seventeen, Rowan didn't like smiling at others, and he never smiled at me. I figured back then, to him, I was probably just the daughter of his father's friend. Even though we had been in the same classes since elementary school, we rarely actually spoke. When Rowan was seventeen, disaster struck his family. His father was reported for financial fraud. Shareholders pulled their investments overnight, the company was shut down and investigated, and his business partners absconded with the funds. The Hayes Corporation became the target of public outrage. Added to the cash flow problems, the Hayes family went bankrupt. At the time, Rowan's mother had already been in the hospital for over a year due to health issues. Neither father nor son told her what happened. In the end, his father sold their house at a heavy discount just to scrape together enough money for her surgery. But when you're at your lowest, tragedies tend to pile on. Rowan's mother made it off the operating table safely, but died of sudden cardiac arrest shortly after. It was a common surgical risk; no one was to blame for the tragedy. But the sorrow didn't end there. The night his mother died, another body appeared below the Hayes Corporation building. His father had jumped. By the time my family rushed over, Rowan was standing in the morgue, staring blankly at the bodies of his parents. My father stepped forward and held him tightly; my mother pulled me close, crying uncontrollably. At the funeral, Rowan didn't cry. Like always, he was just silent, watching the friends and relatives who came to pay their respects with no joy and no sorrow. The few friends his father had when he was alive didn't show up. Although they claimed they were tied up with business, I knew they were just afraid of getting involved in the mess. Despite the large number of relatives, not a single one offered to take in a seventeen-year-old Rowan. We couldn't bear to let him go back to that shabby rented apartment. Rowan was in a daze, like a walking corpse. He slept quietly in our guest room that night. My father said, if they won't raise Rowan, I will. And just like that, Rowan stayed at our house. He still went to school and came home like usual. His grades were always at the top of the class, and he had an ever-growing list of admirers. He was as normal as could be, but I always felt that the more normal he acted, the more he was suppressing his true emotions. I figured our house wasn't where Rowan truly wanted to be. My father seemed to notice this too. One day, he suddenly placed the keys to the Hayes family villa in front of Rowan. A flicker of emotion finally crossed his deadened face. He nodded, said thank you, took the keys, and left our house. I knew my father was good to Rowan mostly to repay the debt of gratitude he owed Rowan's father for giving him his start. But now, he truly cared for the boy from the bottom of his heart. After Rowan moved back into the Hayes house, he stopped going to school. He locked himself inside all day. Even when I went to drop off food, I could only leave it at the door. But days passed, and the food at the door remained untouched. I suspected he was having suicidal thoughts. "Rowan! Rowan!" After losing count of how many times I failed to see him, I had no choice but to bang loudly on the floor-to-ceiling windows of the balcony. No one answered. Finally, I smashed a hole in the glass with a rock, stuck my arm in, unlocked the door, and went inside. Probably hearing the noise, Rowan finally came downstairs. He was wearing dirty clothes, enveloped in a cloud of gloom. He was much thinner than the last time I saw him, and a fine stubble covered his chin. Although it was a false alarm, I was still furious. But before I could blow up, he grabbed me and dragged me toward the bedroom. "What are you doing! I'm going to scream!" I struggled in terror, but Rowan was tall and strong, and he literally dragged me all the way into the bedroom. It's over, I thought. Rowan's suppressed his feelings for too long, he's finally lost his mind. However, what awaited me wasn't the horrifying scene I had imagined, but a shallow stinging sensation on the back of my hand. Only then did I realize that the back of my hand had been cut by the glass at some point. Rowan carefully disinfected my wound with a cotton swab. His clumsy yet gentle demeanor was as if he were handling a fragile, precious treasure. It was right then that I realized I had a bit of a crush on him. Later, I talked to him a lot. I told him he could stay home alone, and he didn't have to go to school, but he absolutely had to eat properly. I also told him that as long as he said he was sad, I would come over and stay with him until he was ready to face the world again. That was the first time I saw Rowan smile, and also the first time I saw him cry like a child. Later, when the investigation into his father's case concluded, it was proven that the rumors were malicious lies. The rumor mongers were arrested, but Rowan's parents were never coming back. It was also that day I learned Rowan had IPAH. He was rushed to the ER, and I was so terrified he would go in and never come out, just like his mother. Thankfully, he was okay. It was also from then on that I secretly changed my college major. It was precisely because we had been through so much together that I had absolute confidence in our relationship. I never imagined another woman appearing by Rowan's side, much less that he would care excessively about any woman other than me. But these five years seemed to have changed too much. I was beginning to doubt. A man I was afraid to even argue with because of his health had actually been hospitalized out of anger over another woman. 4 Rowan slept until early the next morning. I had a nurse arrange some tests for him. As long as there were no major issues, he could be discharged. I sat on a stool watching Rowan. He stared out the window, his brows furrowed slightly, lost in thought. "Rowan, after you fell asleep yesterday, Lily Evans came by." Actually, she had never left. Rowan shot me a quick glance, then asked calmly, "Did she say anything?" "She said thank you for all your help, and that she's going home to get married." "Cough, cough..." Rowan clutched his chest and started coughing. Normally, I would rush forward to coddle him, but now, I figured a few coughs wouldn't kill him. After all, he'd already passed out for her. "How is that possible..." Rowan muttered to himself. "Why wouldn't it be possible?" I fired back instantly: "Do you know her that well?" "Harper..." Rowan looked at me, his face pale. "Do you really want to talk about this right now?" "Fine, we won't talk about it. You're sick, after all." I didn't want to bother with him anymore. I pulled off the pulse oximeter and turned to leave. For whatever reason, Rowan grabbed my hand. "Ever since she left the house that time, she's been coming to the company a lot. Every time, I've had my assistant turn her away. I just didn't expect her to follow me to the parking lot yesterday, and even say she wanted to..." He didn't finish the sentence. I turned to look at him, and he looked back at me, lost. "She said she wanted to get married, and you were so furious you passed out." I couldn't help but find it funny. "Rowan, just admit it. "In the three years you've known her, you wavered." I shook off his hand and ignored his calls, told the nurses outside to keep an eye on him, and went back to my office. Before returning to the States, I never imagined that I'd come home to face Rowan's infidelity. Those five years of sleepless nights and relentless studying felt like a complete joke. I moved out of the Hayes estate. At first, he stood outside my door saying a lot of sweet things, bringing up all our memories from high school. Listening to him, apart from sadness, I just felt a heavy weight on my heart. He knew our best memories were from back then. But the more he made me reminisce, the more lost I felt. Later, when he realized I wasn't just throwing a tantrum, he panicked. He started apologizing constantly, promising he would cut all ties with Lily, that he would never let her appear in front of me again, let alone near our lives. My parents thought that since Rowan had admitted his mistake, and since nothing physical had actually happened with Lily, I should forgive him for the sake of our twenty years of history. But how many times had I woken up in the middle of the night, the image of Rowan smiling tenderly at Lily flashing in my mind? His smile was no longer exclusively mine, and his heart was slowly shifting away. I really did love him hopelessly. Being able to endure five years in a foreign country was entirely because of him. But now, I was starting to doubt. I was doubting if it was all worth it. "Harper, today is your birthday. Can we please just see each other?" After many days, Rowan's voice had grown hoarse. He knocked on the door outside, but I ignored him. "Okay... if you ever want to see me, just call. I have something I want to tell you too..." Rowan's desolate voice drifted in, followed by the sound of his heavy, retreating footsteps. I wiped away the dried tear tracks on my face, ready to pull myself together, when I received a text. It was from Chase. Ever since I went abroad, I hadn't had much contact with my old high school friend. Even when I did get news, it was through Rowan telling me how Chase was doing. That familiar chat box blinked on my screen. "Happy Birthday, Miss Brooks!" Followed immediately by another text. "When are you cashing in on that dinner you owe me? I've already picked out a super expensive restaurant ι(｀?-?′)/" His use of emoticons was so spot-on it gave me intense déjà vu. I replied: "Let's do today then. Are you free?" Chase replied instantly: "? For real?" Me: "For real, but if you're too slow, this lady won't wait around." This time, he didn't reply for a long time. By the time I got another message, he had already parked his car outside my door. Still rocking that eye-catching blonde hair and edgy, loud clothes. Seeing me, Chase lowered his sunglasses and gave me a cocky eyebrow raise: "Get in. I'm taking you out for a good time!" "Humph." I sniffled slightly, opened the door, and got in. The car smelled faintly of paint. "I think I'm taking you out for a good time, okay?" "Alright, alright, Miss Brooks. You're the boss. Where to?" Chase tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, seemingly in a great mood. For some reason, seeing Chase like this made me feel incredibly at ease. So much had changed in the last five years, but Chase was still the same carefree guy he had always been. "Pfft—" "What are you laughing at?" Chase looked at me laughing uncontrollably, completely bewildered. "Nothing... let's go eat." I said excitedly. "Let's go somewhere with a huge menu!" "A huge menu?"
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