I starred in a queer romance show and it turned me gay. When I confessed, the younger actor shot me down. "You're five years older than me, Liam. Can't you tell the difference between acting and reality?" I walked away and avoided him for three years. I never imagined the show would become a massive hit, forcing us back together for promotional events. Worried he'd be uncomfortable, I puffed out my chest and assured him, "Don't worry, I went through some intensive therapy and got it all sorted out. I'm as straight as you are now." But now, at every event we do together… whenever I get close, his lips find mine. "Sorry," he'll whisper, "we kissed so much back then… my body just remembers." 1 Three years ago, I shot a TV series with two male leads alongside Theo Thorne. Given the subject matter, I figured it would never see the light of day. Who knew that when it was finally released this year, it would explode? Back then, I was the seasoned actor and Theo was the fresh-faced rookie. Now, I'm just a guy who reliably plays supporting roles, never quite breaking through. Theo, on the other hand, is one of the biggest stars in the industry. Thanks to him, my name has been trending lately, too. My agency is desperate to capitalize on this sudden wave of popularity. I’d made a point of avoiding any event Theo was at, but they sent my agent, Jenna, to personally persuade me. "Liam, whatever beef you have with Theo, you have to do this joint live stream while the show is airing," she said, her tone leaving no room for argument. "Otherwise, the rumors will get nasty." I was taken aback. "What beef could I possibly have with Theo?" It was nothing like that. I'd just gotten too deep into my role and let him turn my world upside down. I’d poured my heart out to him, only to be rejected. I wasn't avoiding him out of hatred. I was avoiding him because there was no point. But no matter how hard I tried, Theo was inescapable. He was so famous his face was everywhere. I ran my thumb over the sandalwood beads on my wrist and finally agreed to the live stream. "Jenna, believe it or not," I said, meeting her gaze, "we were each other's only male lead. I've never wished him anything but the best." From my 28th to my 31st year, that chapter should have been long closed. Jenna looked relieved. "Oh, I thought you were homophobic or something. That you regretted doing a queer show with him and that's why you were hiding." She leaned in conspiratorially. "I mean, you two were practically shoving your tongues down each other's throats in every other scene. I can't imagine any straight guy being okay with that." I choked on my water. "Ahem… well, you're not wrong, but you don't have to be so crude about it." 2 When I arrived at the studio, the reality of Daybreak's popularity hit me. A crowd of shippers was waiting, holding signs for "TheoStorm"—our couple name—and chanting for us. I gave them a respectful bow. As I straightened up, an egg splattered against my head. "You leech! Stop sucking the life out of my idol! Just die!" a girl screamed. I was stunned. I’d been in the business for a while, built a reputation for being professional and easy to work with. I’d never been publicly insulted like this. Gooey egg yolk dripped into my eyes, blurring my vision. "Jenna? Where are you?" It sounded like Jenna was arguing with the egg-thrower. My vision went dark, and I swayed on my feet. The next second, a jacket was thrown over my head. A hand steadied my shoulder, and a calm, deep voice said, "This way." I was led into a restroom inside the building. After a quick rinse, I licked a drop of water from my lips and thanked the person beside me. "Theo. Thanks for that." He was dressed in all black, completely covered up. He pulled off his hat and mask. At six-foot-three, I had to crane my neck to meet his eyes. "The fans didn't even recognize me. How did you know?" I paused. Looking at his curly lashes, the high bridge of his nose, and those lips that were slightly upturned, so damn kissable… how could I not know? While filming, I had kissed every feature of his face. I knew the faint, clean scent of pine that clung to his skin. I knew about the mole on his neck. For those few months, I knew his body better than he did. I shook my head, trying to clear the strange thoughts along with the water from my hair. I extended my hand like a gentleman. "Theo. It's been a while." He took it, his gaze deep and unreadable. "Liam. You look well." Tsk. Three years ago, it was always "Liam, my friend" or "Liam, my brother." Now he was just using my name. So quick to forget. Then again, he'd earned the right. "Oh, by the way, Theo," I said, my smile wide and sincere. "I'm straight now." 3 Theo must have been thrilled. The troublesome colleague who'd confessed to him so recklessly had finally seen the light. He wouldn't have to worry about me crossing any lines. A straight guy and a straight guy. There was zero possibility. In the makeup room, Jenna told me the girl who threw the egg had been taken to the police station. She was an extremist fan of Theo's, and the popularity of our on-screen couple had apparently driven her over the edge. Jenna was still fuming. "You haven't once tried to ride his coattails since the show aired! How dare she call you a leech?" I sighed. I hadn't actively tried, but I had definitely benefited. When we shot Daybreak, Theo was a newcomer, but his talent was astonishing. I knew he'd be a huge star; I just didn't expect it to happen so fast. He shot up like a wildfire, reaching heights I could no longer touch. In the month since the show started airing, my friend Evan, another actor, called me, his voice green with envy. "You sly bastard, you kept it a secret that you did a show with Theo Thorne! Your career is about to take off…" For most actors, working with Theo was a dream come true. "So, what was it like shooting those intimate scenes with him? Isn't he supposed to be walking pheromones, irresistible to everyone?" "It was years ago," I deflected. "Who remembers?" But the truth was, I remembered every single detail. I still haven't watched the final cut of Daybreak. The thought of reliving that obsessive crush I had on him… it was too humiliating. I didn't want to remember. But I forgot one thing. The studio's live streams were famous for being bold. As the broadcast began, the host played a fan-made compilation of Daybreak's best moments. On the high-definition screen, the story unfolded. I played a volunteer teacher who meets a young, free-spirited ranch hand in the mountains. The teacher falls for him at first sight but doesn't pursue him directly, instead using subtle ways to seduce him. The young man struggles, slowly falling for him, only to find out the teacher is planning to return to the city after the New Year to get married. At the break of dawn, after a night of turmoil, the young man pushes open the teacher's door. They finally give in. Their first sweet, stolen moment. 4 The clip dragged me right back to that sweltering, intense summer. The summer I was utterly mesmerized by Theo. The sound of our breathing echoed in my ears, and my mind went blank. "Liam," a voice said beside me. Theo was sitting next to me on the sofa, his handsome, mature face just inches away. "What are you spacing out for? The host asked what you thought of the fan edit." My throat was dry. "It was great. Both Theo and I looked very handsome." Theo chuckled, leaning closer. His dark, bright eyes reflected my own image back at me. "I thought it was great, too. Especially that last intimate scene. Your expression was so sweet… and so dirty." A sense of dread washed over me. Was Theo actively trying to play up our couple dynamic? The live chat exploded. [Whoa, did he really just say that? My poor virgin ears!] [Theo seems VERY satisfied with the beautiful husband the production provided. It's been three years and he's still teasing him!] [Look at his face, he's totally reliving it. The shippers said Theo had a great time filming this, and yeah, looks like he did!] [I didn't believe the rumor that Theo disguised himself as a fan to save Liam from that egg attack, but now… I'm a believer!] Theo continued, "The director had really high standards for that scene. We had to kiss so many times our lips went numb." I just stared at him. Who asked you? Literally no one asked you. My scalp was tingling. Had Theo been possessed? Every word out of his mouth was loaded. Little did I know, this was just the beginning. The more he talked, the bolder he got. The host would ask, and he would answer. "My first impression of Liam? His skin is very fair, very soft. It bruises easily." "I was the one who usually led the intimate scenes. He gets shy." "To get into character faster, Liam and I slept in the same room every night." "Liam's birthday was on set. I gave him a sandalwood bracelet. He got drunk that night, and I had to carry him back to…" My face was on fire. I clamped a hand over his mouth. Was he using my name as a comma? "Theo! This is a live broadcast," I hissed through gritted teeth. He just raised an eyebrow and whispered in my ear, "Don't worry. I won't mention how you forced a kiss on me when you were drunk…" He was doing this on purpose! The show started trending topic after topic. No one was accusing me of leeching off his fame anymore. Now, the fans were convinced we'd been secretly dating for years. The host asked, "So, you two have kept in touch all this time?" My heart sank. Everyone in the industry knew I'd been avoiding him for three years. But Theo just smiled sweetly and said, "Of course." 5 During a commercial break, I lit a cigarette and blocked his path. "What the hell are you playing at?" If I wasn't me, I'd actually believe we'd fallen in love on set. Theo snatched the cigarette from my fingers. His bangs fell over his eyes, casting a dark shadow over his face. "I'm just telling the truth." "You're talking about the past," I said calmly. "Three years in the past. We're not in that kind of relationship now." He suddenly reached out and pinched my earlobe. It was one of my sensitive spots. He used to toy with it whenever we kissed. "Liam, before this live stream, people were saying our shippers were just eating up fake, manufactured chemistry. What do you think about that?" During the show's run, they'd been releasing behind-the-scenes footage. In the clips, we were incredibly close. Even when we weren't filming, we were always smiling at each other, holding hands, with our arms around each other's waists. That genuine affection from back then was now being dismissed as completely fake because of the huge gap in our career status. Theo's eyes were defiant. "I don't care what's real or fake. All I know is that you and I, hiding in our room and making out, was real." The tension in my brow eased. "Oh, I see. You were giving the shippers what they wanted." It was a shame, really. He had to create content on the spot. I felt a surge of admiration. Theo had more talent than me, and he worked harder. No wonder he was a superstar while I was still stuck in mediocrity. My mind was always filled with useless things like feelings and kissing and… other stuff. I was so shallow. It was surprising that an actor of his stature needed to resort to this, but then again, in this industry, who didn't want to be more famous? There was no shame in using a popular ship to boost your profile. I was moved. "Don't worry," I said earnestly. "You want to play up the couple angle? I'll cooperate. I'll give it my all." Theo's expression was strange. He even cursed at me. "Liam, you're an idiot." He probably didn't trust a "straight guy" like me to do a good job. My competitive spirit flared. Who was he looking down on? Playing a part for the fans was just another form of acting. When Theo was just starting out, I was the one who taught him everything, step by step. He said he'd never really kissed anyone, so I let him kiss me until my lips were numb. He said he didn't understand the dynamics between men, so I let him use me for practice… Eventually, he was the one taking the lead, biting the back of my neck with a primal intensity, his eyes red like a wild animal's. He was so convincing, I thought he'd actually fallen for me. Turns out, I was the one who got lost in the role. He was just being a professional. But I was fine now. I could play a straight guy playing a gay guy. Easy. 6 For the game segment, I chose the most intimate option: the Pocky challenge. The host was practically vibrating with excitement. "Oh my god, are they actually going to kiss?!" I took a bite, closing the distance. Our lips were a hair's breadth apart, our breaths mingling. Theo either had to forfeit or kiss me. This was just for show; he wouldn't actually do it. I held my position, blinking innocently. Suddenly, his large, warm hand clamped onto the back of my neck, pulling me forward. He stole the last tiny crumb of the biscuit from my mouth. Theo held up a script to block the camera's view. The audience couldn't see it, but we were really kissing. Only the host saw everything, and she was screaming into her mic. "AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!" "I NEED A RESPIRATOR! GET ME A RESPIRATOR!" Theo rested his chin on my shoulder, his damp lips brushing against my earlobe. "Sorry," he whispered. "We kissed so much back then… my body just remembers." I didn't dare look at the live chat. And I couldn't exactly scold him for using his tongue. After all, I was the one who taught him how. It was an exhilarating live stream. Theo and I dominated the trending topics all night. After that, my career took off. Offers started pouring in. Jenna, ever the pragmatist, knew we owed Theo. She arranged a dinner to thank him. At the table, she told me to propose a toast. In this industry, status trumps age. I willingly poured a glass of wine, but before I could raise it, Theo took it from me, his thumb brushing the palm of my hand. "You can't handle your liquor, so don't force it," he said. "Jenna, I actually brought my manager, Mark, to talk about our upcoming joint activities." The two agents excused themselves to the adjacent private room, leaving Theo and me alone. 7 His presence was overwhelming. The shippers said he was like a snake and I was a rabbit, and every look he gave me was like he was about to swallow me whole. There was a time I was hopelessly lost in those eyes. Now I understood: a good actor can look at anyone with devotion. I looked at Theo and offered a gentle warning. "Playing up the couple thing is a win-win, but there has to be a line. Let's not actually kiss next time. If people start thinking you're not straight, you'll be in trouble." He had a big movie coming out. Going too far would definitely have consequences. "You were so close," Theo said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "And your lips were all puckered up. Of course I couldn't resist." My lips? Was he saying I started it? Well, I was the one benefiting most from this partnership. To do some damage control, I pulled him in for a selfie and posted it online. Reunited with my good friend @TheoThorne. Reminiscing about the old days. The shippers descended immediately. [The more you try to hide it, the more obvious it is.] [You were just making out on a live stream, and now you're pretending to be straight? A little late for that, sweetie.] Hmph. I didn't need to pretend. I was straight. Theo leaned over my shoulder to look at my phone. The strands of his hair tickled my neck, and the scent of pine filled my senses, throwing me back to those months we spent living in each other's pockets. My heart began to race. Just then, a new comment popped up. [This is the great thing about straight guys. Even if they catch feelings, they convince themselves they're supposed to like girls. Even if they get turned on, they think they're sick. They keep lying to themselves until they realize they only react that way to one person!] A smirk played on Theo's lips. "Speaking of which, you used to have some pretty strong reactions during our scenes. Got me all wet once." I couldn't deny it. My face burned, and I shoved him away. "You were no better." The atmosphere was getting tense. And hot. I tried to steer the conversation back to safer ground. "Theo, I was the one who got too into the role back then. I made a mistake." I had to make it clear I wouldn't be a problem. "Don't worry. I went to therapy and got it sorted out. Guaranteed straight now." Theo's expression soured, and his focus was… odd. "What kind of therapy works that well?" "Uh…" I felt awkward. "It wasn't actual therapy. It was more like… chat-erapy." "Chemo?" Theo looked alarmed. "Are you sick?" I scratched my head. "No, not that kind of chemo. My friend Evan, you know him? He can talk for an entire night without stopping. He could talk a man out of any problem." "I wasn't that far gone. He talked me straight in one session…" The words had barely left my mouth when I saw Jenna standing in the doorway, her face a mask of shock. "Who's not straight?!"
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