The car crash landed me in the hospital. Hannah rushed over, but only long enough to sign a consent form before disappearing. “Something came up at home,” she’d said, leaving me—the guy with the freshly broken leg—all alone. Hours later, after I was out of surgery, I saw a new post from her stepbrother, Leo. It was on his Instagram story. “Just landed and she’s the first person I see. That’s what I call family.” The picture was of Hannah, beaming at the arrivals gate of the airport in the next city over. He’d even forwarded it to the family group chat, a blatant challenge to me, her actual boyfriend. I almost laughed. I typed back a cheerful reply. “What’s a little family bonding between… well, family. Guess that makes you two really close.” 1 I don’t have any family. For seven years, I’d been in New York with Hannah, just the two of us against the world. When she hurried in to sign my surgical consent, a warmth flooded my chest. For a moment, I felt like I had a family, too. Then, in the next breath, she was gone. “Something came up at home,” she’d tossed over her shoulder, not even sparing a glance for me or my injuries. Before I could say a word, she had vanished down the chaotic hospital corridor. When I was wheeled out of the operating room, my first instinct was to call and tell her I was okay. But the first thing I saw was Leo’s post in the group chat. Hannah, holding a huge bouquet of yellow lilies, waving with a brilliant smile at the airport arrivals gate. And his caption: “Just landed and she’s the first person I see. That’s what I call family.” I instinctively tried to shift my right leg, now encased in a heavy plaster cast. The anesthesia was wearing off, and a deep, throbbing ache was setting in. The anger and pain boiled over, and I called her. We fought. Her voice was sharp with impatience, just like every other time we’d argued. “Leo is my brother, Alex! Can you stop being so unreasonable?” “It was a minor accident, for god’s sake. Can’t you be a man and tough it out?” In the background, I could hear Leo’s smug laughter. “Hannah, we’re having a family dinner. Stop taking calls from outsiders.” The words, “He’s not even your blood relative,” died on my tongue as Hannah coldly hung up. A dull ache settled in my chest, heavy and suffocating. I went to my contacts and blocked her number. I didn’t want to bother my friends, so I swallowed my pride and hired a private nurse. I spent the next two and a half weeks in the hospital, enduring the curious whispers and pitying looks from the other patients in my shared room. The day before my discharge, a message came through from one of our mutual friends, clearly on Hannah’s behalf. “Alex, honey, can I come pick you up tomorrow?” It was her signal for a truce. In the ten years we’d been together, this was her pattern. She would hurt me with reckless abandon, then act as if nothing had happened, showering me with affection to smooth things over. And I, who had always treated her like a princess, had never held it against her. I never brought up the past. So she never cared whether her barbs left scars. She knew I would always be there with a smile, ready to forgive and forget. But this time was different. I was done. I had poured all my hopes for a family into her, desperately clinging to any scrap of warmth she offered. But in the end, I was just an outsider. I unblocked her number and sent a simple reply with my discharge time and room number. She replied instantly, a rare occurrence. “I’ll be there on time tomorrow, I promise! Mwah.” “And I’ll bring you some of my homemade chicken soup, okay?” Before, a reply that fast would have had me glowing, already online shopping for a gift to celebrate us making up. This time, I didn’t even have the energy to respond. I just turned off my phone and went to sleep. 2 My discharge was scheduled for ten in the morning. I sat on the edge of the hospital bed and waited. Ten o’clock came and went. Then eleven. Then noon. No sign of Hannah. The nurse on her rounds looked surprised to see me still there. “Alex, I thought you were heading home today?” I forced a weak smile. “Just waiting for a friend to pick me up.” The prying eyes of the other patients were becoming unbearable. I tried calling Hannah. No answer. I waited until after three in the afternoon. Still no Hannah. No message, no call. The nurse came back, looking apologetic. “I’m sorry, Alex, but we have a new patient who needs this bed.” I managed a bitter laugh. “Right. Sorry. I’ll be on my way.” Leaning heavily on my crutches, I’d just made it to the hospital entrance when I saw Hannah rushing in, breathless. “I’m so sorry, honey! I had to drive Leo to a job interview in the next city over, I just got back…” I cut her off with a soft chuckle. “It’s fine.” Hannah froze, a frown creasing her brow. A flicker of anger crossed her face. “You’re mad. You’re blaming me for being late, aren’t you? Leo and I are…” “I’m not mad.” I sidestepped her attempt to take my arm. “Let’s just go home. I’m tired.” “Alex.” She planted herself in front of me, her eyes narrowed. “Where did you learn to be so passive-aggressive? You’ve never been like this.” “Like what?” I met her glare with a calm, almost amused look. “Is it wrong for me to be understanding now?” “I…” She faltered, looking flustered. “Whatever. Let’s just go home.” I maneuvered myself into the back seat of the car. Hannah shot me a glare over her shoulder, clearly annoyed. I beat her to it. “More legroom back here.” She pressed her lips into a thin line but didn’t argue. The exhaustion of the day finally caught up to me, and I drifted off, my head resting against the cool glass of the window. I didn’t wake until the sound of Hannah’s phone shattered the quiet. 3 “Hannah! I got the job!” Leo’s triumphant voice boomed from the car’s speakers. Hannah, who was driving, had put him on speakerphone. She glanced nervously at me in the rearview mirror. Seeing my eyes were still closed, she quickly lowered the volume, a wave of relief washing over her face. “I’m just picking Alex up from the hospital,” she said, her voice a little too casual. “Guess where I am!” Leo laughed, and the sound of howling wind grew louder, more piercing through the phone. The color drained from Hannah’s face. She slammed on the brakes, the sudden stop nearly throwing me from my seat. She paid me no mind, her voice a shrill cry. “Leo! Are you street racing again?!” “Have you forgotten you just got back, that you’re supposed to be recovering? Do you have a death wish?!” “Where are you right now?!” “You know where,” Leo’s voice floated back, light and careless, before he hung up with a laugh. Hannah’s hands were already on the wheel, ready to spin the car around, when her eyes met mine in the rearview mirror. She finally remembered I was there. “Honey…” she started, her expression torn. I knew what was coming. Some flimsy excuse about how Leo’s reckless behavior was more dangerous, how he needed her more than I did, now that I was safely out of the hospital. Before she could even start spinning her story, I made it easy for her. I tapped on the window. “Just let me out here.” “I can grab a cab.” Hannah stared at me, searching my face for any sign of jealousy, but her fingers had already betrayed her, flicking the switch to unlock the doors. I smiled. The soft click of the lock felt like a final, tolling bell in my heart. I dragged my casted leg out of the car. I watched as her car, without a moment’s hesitation, made a sharp U-turn and sped off toward the highway, back toward the next city over. She didn’t even seem to notice that she’d dropped me on a quiet side road, the kind where cabs are a rare sight. I was leaning on my crutches by the curb when my phone rang. It was Jake. “Buddy, listen up. The company’s sending a senior programmer to the States for a special program on the West Coast. I put your name forward.” Jake was a VP at the company and my senior from college. Every time an opportunity like this came up, I was the first person he thought of. And every time, I’d turned him down, using the excuse that I couldn't leave Hannah, that I wasn’t cut out for life somewhere new. Before I could speak, Jake cut me off. “And don’t you dare give me that crap about not wanting to leave your girlfriend. This is a once-in-a-lifetime shot!” “It’s not like you’re going to outer space. If you can’t survive a year of long-distance, then you need to ditch the girl! I’ll find you someone better, I swear!” I let out a genuine laugh. Hannah and I had been high school sweethearts. Three years of high school, four of college, and three more since graduation. Ten years. A decade where I was almost never apart from her. The day we graduated from college, she came with me to visit my parents’ graves. I remember whispering my prayer to the quiet stones. “I want to be with Hannah forever. I want a family.” Back then, Hannah had squeezed my hand tight, her voice full of conviction. “Alex, I am your family.” That was before her mother remarried, and her stepbrother, Leo, entered our lives. I had loved her for a decade. And in my most vulnerable moment, she had abandoned me. First in a hospital, then on a deserted street. All my devotion, all my hope… it was all just a bad investment. “When do I leave?” I asked, my voice steady. Jake was ecstatic. “Attaboy! You finally came to your senses! This is going to change everything for you, your whole career!” “Send me your resume right now, I’ll forward it to the team in California!” I looked up at the darkening sky. Still no sign of a cab. A dry laugh escaped my lips. “Jake? Could you do me a favor first? Come pick me up? My leg’s not exactly cooperating right now.”
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