Ten years ago, Dan, the boy I’d grown up with, the heartthrob of our school, confessed his feelings for me. My heart was soaring, ready to burst with joy, when a wave of raucous laughter suddenly erupted around us. Only then did I realize it was all just a game of Truth or Dare. 1 I had no idea my old high school class was having a reunion at The Grandview Hotel when I walked in. It was Jessica who spotted me first. “Claire?” she called out, her voice laced with disbelief. I turned. A flash of stunned admiration crossed her eyes before she smiled. “It really is you! I thought you’d skip this one, just like you always do.” I was about to explain that I was here on business, not for some ghost of a high school reunion, but she’d already slung an arm around my shoulders. Her grip was firm, almost forceful, as she steered me toward a private banquet room. “Look who I found!” she announced, her voice booming. A collective gasp went through the room as all eyes fell on me. Someone chuckled. “Leave it to Jessica to have that kind of pull. She actually got our ‘Princess’ to show up.” Honestly, I hated that nickname. It, along with Jessica, had been a recurring nightmare that haunted my entire high school existence. Back then, she didn't bother hiding her malice. She would often jeer at me in front of everyone, “Claire, your bra strap is showing. It’s pink.” The room would explode with laughter. Just as I stood there, mortified, with tears welling in my eyes, she’d coolly add, “You’re not gonna cry, are you? It was just a joke. Can’t you take a joke?” And when the tears inevitably fell, her face would twist with impatience. “Oh, come on, stop crying, Princess. I can’t stand girls like you, all weepy over nothing. It’s not like I did anything to you. Besides, you’re the one who pads her bra so much. You were just asking for people to talk about it, weren’t you?” The memories were a bitter taste in my mouth. I quietly found a seat in a corner, planning to slip out after a couple of minutes. But then, a lean, tall figure sat down beside me. A silhouette I once knew better than my own. My childhood best friend. Dan. “Claire,” he began, his voice raspy with emotion. “It’s been a long time. How… how have you been?” Before I could answer, Jessica slid into the seat between us, a little too perfectly. “Hey! What are you two whispering about behind my back?” she chirped. Whatever words had been on the tip of Dan’s tongue vanished. “Nothing,” he said, a flicker of annoyance in his eyes. Jessica, pretending not to notice, sighed dramatically. “Well, you two really should catch up. Seriously, Claire, you were cold. Disappearing right after graduation without a word. You even cut off Dan, the guy you grew up with. If we’d known you couldn’t take a joke, we never would have played that prank on you.” “Yeah,” Dan murmured, his gaze fixed on me, a thousand unspoken words swirling in their depths. “But now that we’ve reconnected, we can’t lose touch again. My mom still asks why you never come over anymore.” Jessica immediately whipped out her phone. “Quick, let’s exchange numbers! I have to show off to my colleagues at work that I know such a gorgeous woman.” And then you’ll secretly pass my number to a hand-picked list of creeps, I thought. It was one of Jessica’s favorite moves. Seeing me hesitate, she raised her voice. “Don’t tell me you’re still holding a grudge after ten years. You’re not that petty, are you?” The chatter in the room died. Every head turned in our direction. Suddenly, I was the villain, the one committing some unforgivable sin. The sixteen-year-old Claire would have frozen, helplessly stammering that it wasn’t true. But I’m twenty-six now. So I looked her straight in the eye and admitted it, my voice clear and steady. “Actually, yes. I’ve always found you pretty unbearable.” Jessica’s face froze. Dan quickly tried to smooth things over. “Alright, let’s not do this. We’re all here to have a good time. Jessica, you know Claire’s sensitive. Why bring up the past?” Hearing Dan call me sensitive used to break my heart. Now, I felt nothing. The lively atmosphere in the room had evaporated. I was about to make my exit when Dan spoke again, his voice earnest. “Claire, all that stuff… it was a long time ago. I’ve been wanting to get everyone together, to clear the air. What happened back then was just a stupid joke. Let’s bury the hatchet and start over.” Jessica was the first to raise her glass, her old devil-may-care grin plastered on her face. “Claire, we were all classmates. If I ever offended you, don’t hold it against me. You know me, I’ve always been a straight-shooter, not great with all those complicated feelings you girly-girls have.” Her words were a signal. One by one, others stood up, glasses in hand. “Yeah, that’s right! Don’t be so dramatic. We always liked Jessica’s straightforward personality best.” “Let the booze do the talking! Who holds a grudge for ten years? Don’t be so petty.” “Seriously, lighten up. Jessica was being the bigger person by even inviting you here today.” They spoke of her dragging me here as if it were some great act of charity, a grace they were bestowing upon me. Their voices were just as grating as the jeers that had followed Dan’s fake confession all those years ago. The implication was clear: if I didn’t raise my glass, if I didn’t make peace with Jessica, I was being ungrateful. But I’ve gotten very good at being ungrateful. I didn’t touch my glass. “I can’t drink,” I said softly. “I’m pregnant.” CRASH. Dan’s glass slipped from his fingers and shattered on the floor. The room was a sea of stunned, whispering faces. Only Jessica had a flicker of genuine delight in her eyes. Dan forced a pained smile. “Don’t joke like that, Claire. If you don’t want to drink, just say so.” I met his gaze calmly. “I’m not joking. I’m married. And pregnant. I’m back in the country with my husband to handle some business.” Jessica clapped me hard on the shoulder, as if we were the best of friends. Her voice was giddy with a joy she couldn't conceal. “When did this happen? Why didn’t you invite us? Congratulations!” It was probably the most sincere thing she’d said all night. After all, she no longer had to pretend to be just Dan’s “girl-bro.” Dan’s voice was bitter, strained, as if he were just casually mentioning it. “Yeah… You always used to say you’d be my bride one day… You’re lying to me, right, Claire?” Someone stepped forward, as if they couldn’t stand to watch this. “Claire, why would you say something like that? Do you have any idea how long Dan has been waiting for you?” Another woman added, her tone dripping with faux-sincere advice, “Look, you came to this reunion, so you obviously still care. A woman who wants a happy life can’t be so difficult. You need to know when to quit. If you let a great guy like Dan go, you’ll regret it. You’ll never find anyone like him again.” Such heartfelt advice. Not a word of it was something I wanted to hear. But I’d learned in high school that nothing good ever came out of their mouths. So I just smiled, completely unbothered. “I really am married. As for what I used to say… let’s just call it a joke.” I held Dan’s gaze, watching as the boomerang he’d thrown ten years ago finally came back and hit him square in the chest. “You’re not going to get upset over a little joke, are you?” 2 Dan and I were inseparable. From kindergarten through our first year of high school, our lives were completely intertwined. Then came Jessica. To be fair, she was pretty, with a confidence that drew people in. When she was first seated in front of me, she didn't seem like the loud, tomboyish type she’d later become. Her eyes lit up when she saw Dan sitting next to me. She leaned back and whispered, “Go tell the teacher you want to switch seats with me.” I shook my head. I didn't want to sit next to a stranger. Suddenly, Jessica leaned back in her chair and called out in a loud, clear voice, “Wow, you’re so possessive. Are you two secretly dating or something?” The entire class turned to stare. Our faces flushed crimson. Dan, his handsome features painted with embarrassment, shot back, “What are you talking about? We’ve known each other our whole lives. What does our friendship have to do with you?” Jessica didn’t get angry at being yelled at. She just grinned. “I’m a straight-shooter, I just say what’s on my mind. Don’t mind me. I just wanted to switch seats with her, but she wouldn’t, so I thought maybe she was jealous.” A chorus of “Oooohs” echoed through the classroom. One of the guys piped up, “What about you? Why do you want to switch with Claire? You got a crush on Dan?” Jessica rolled her eyes dramatically. “You guys are so predictable. See a boy and a girl and you have to ship them. Can’t I just like sitting in the back? Besides, Claire’s so short, I’m afraid I’ll block her view of the board.” Dan glanced between us, judging our heights. “She does have a point, Claire,” he said softly. “It might be a bit hard for you to see. Do you want to switch?” I refused. Jessica shot me a look, one full of hidden meaning. Soon after, rumors that Dan and I were secretly dating started spreading like wildfire. The dean called us into his office several times before finally separating us for good. He moved me to a desk by the window and Dan to one against the far wall. We were on opposite sides of the world. That’s when Jessica came to us, a look of profound guilt on her face. “I’m so sorry. I’m just so blunt, I don’t have a filter. I say whatever pops into my head. I never thought people would spread such crazy rumors about you two.” I felt like something was off about her, but I couldn’t put my finger on it. Dan, ever the forgiving one, felt his irritation melt away at her apology. “It’s fine,” he said. “You didn’t do it on purpose.” Jessica laughed, a bright, open sound. “I knew you were a bigger man than that! That’s why I love talking to you guys. You’re so chill, not like those other girls who are so petty and dramatic, always overthinking everything.” She immediately slapped a hand over her mouth and looked at me sheepishly. “Oh, I didn’t mean you, of course.” She’d already said it. If I reacted, I would just be proving her right—that I was the petty, dramatic girl she was talking about. I was too thin-skinned back then, and I figured since we didn't interact much, it wasn't worth making a fuss over. I had no idea that from that day on, Jessica would begin to systematically insert herself into my life with Dan. Because her desk was closer to his, they naturally grew closer. Soon, my walk home from school with Dan became a walk home with Dan and Jessica. She was loud and acted like one of the guys, quickly becoming friends with all the boys in our class, including Dan. One day, while roughhousing with Dan, Jessica knocked my water bottle off my desk. It shattered on the floor. It was part of a matching set I had with Dan. “Oh my God, I’m so, so sorry!” she exclaimed, frantically apologizing. “Let me buy you a new one. Please don’t be mad.” I shook my head quietly. “It’s okay. It was an accident. It’s just a bottle, you don’t have to replace it.” Jessica leaned down, her voice dropping to a conspiratorial whisper. “I really should. I know you little girls. You say it’s fine to my face, then you’ll go gossip behind my back.” What was that supposed to mean? That I was a gossip? The way the other girls nearby looked at me suddenly changed. “I said you don’t have to,” I repeated, my tone hardening. Jessica pointed a finger at me and raised her voice. “See? Look! Now she’s mad! It’s just a stupid bottle. If you wanted me to pay for it, you should have just said so! Why be so two-faced? I can’t stand girls who can’t just say what they mean.” She nudged Dan. “Hey, you better talk to your girl, or someone’s going to be in a mood all night.” Dan had been feeling guilty about the bottle. He knew how much I loved it. At her words, he sighed. “Come on, Claire, don’t be so petty. I’ll just buy you a new one. It’s not like it was expensive.” A knot of anger tightened in my chest. He thought I was being petty, too? My face hardened. “I’ll buy my own. I don’t need you to.” Dan knew he’d said the wrong thing and was about to apologize when Jessica slung an arm around his shoulder. “Dude, what kind of apology was that? You’re just making the Princess angrier. C’mon, let’s bounce. We’ll come back and apologize when Her Highness has cooled down.” And just like that, I had a new nickname in class. The Princess. Later, Dan himself would sometimes say it to me, his voice edged with impatience. “Alright, stop with the princess attitude. You don’t have the life of a princess, but you’ve sure got the attitude down.” But at that point, things hadn't gotten that bad yet. And I wasn't smart enough to see the deep-seated malice hidden beneath Jessica’s “blunt” personality. The shift in Dan—or at least, the moment I truly saw it—happened the next day, when I brought my new water bottle to school. It was a cartoon cat mug we had made together at a pottery shop during a trip. As Jessica passed my desk, she feigned surprise. “Is that a cartoon cat mug, Claire? You’re in high school. You still believe in that cutesy stuff?” All eyes in the classroom snapped to me. She picked it up and held it aloft for everyone to see. “Look! This is something a first-grader wouldn’t even use, and Claire’s using it! Hahaha! Claire, do you secretly make wishes to it?” “Hahahaha…” The room filled with exaggerated, piercing laughter. Even Dan—the same Dan who, on that trip, had pointed at that exact mug design and said it was cute and that we should make it—was smiling from his seat, watching me stand there, mortified. I was never an outgoing person. The harsh laughter felt like a swarm of angry bees, buzzing through my ears, churning my stomach, filling my head with a deafening roar. Jessica tilted her head, watching my face drain of color. “You okay? It was just a joke. You’re not getting upset over something so small, are you?” My knuckles were white from clenching my fists. Finally, Dan noticed how distressed I was. “Alright, that’s enough,” he said, his voice cutting through the noise. The sunlight streaming through the window cast a golden halo around him. “If the other person doesn’t think it’s funny, it’s not a joke. All of you, knock it off.” Jessica pouted. “Fine, fine. We get it. You have to protect your precious little childhood sweetheart.” She turned to her friends. “I guess we’re all just disposable friends he can toss aside.” Dan frowned. “What are you talking about now?” Their conversation brought them closer. Jessica hopped onto his desk, leaning over to playfully push his head down. “Alright, I’m letting you off the hook this time. Don’t forget to buy me lunch for this.” As she spoke, she glanced over at me, her eyes filled with resentment. 3 I had always believed that, with or without Jessica, I would always be Dan’s first choice. Until the day I waited for him all through lunch. The food in my lunchbox went from hot to cold. The bell signaling the end of the lunch break rang. A moment later, a boisterous group stumbled into the classroom, laughing and shoving each other. Dan saw the two lunchboxes on my desk and froze. “Claire? You haven’t eaten yet?” Jessica was even more theatrical in her surprise. “No way, Claire. Why are you so stubborn? We told you Dan was going out for spicy hot pot with us today. Who are you putting on this sad little show for? Dan has his own life, you know.” At her words, the guilt in Dan’s eyes vanished, replaced by a cold annoyance. “Claire, I can’t take care of you forever. Can’t you be a little more considerate, like Jessica?” I stared at him, bewildered. “When did you tell me you were going out for hot pot?” Jessica took a step back, as if she’d just encountered something completely irrational. “Are you trying to say I didn’t tell you? Seriously? Lucky for me, Mark and the guys were right there when I asked you. This is a school, Claire, not a stage for your petty dramas.” Mark, the boy she’d named, stepped forward. “Yeah, we asked you to come. You said you didn’t want to because you thought it was unsanitary. And now you’re acting all pitiful in front of the whole class.” “You’re being really manipulative,” another added. That was the final straw for Dan. His face turned to stone. “That’s enough, Claire. You’ve gone too far.” “This is school, not your house. Not everyone is going to baby you.” His words were daggers in my heart. The boy who had always walked by my side, who had pinky-promised to be my best friend for a hundred years, was now, in front of everyone, accusing me of being manipulative over something that never even happened. Jessica had approached me during our morning exercises. She’d pulled me aside and asked a few vague questions while Mark and the others stood far off in the distance. Then she’d walked away. No one had ever asked me if I wanted to go out for lunch. No one had told me not to wait for Dan. I tried to explain, to defend myself, but my voice was drowned out by the chorus of accusations. No one believed me. Realizing this, I choked back a sob, pushed past them, and ran out of the classroom, tears streaming down my face. I heard Jessica’s voice behind me. “Crying doesn’t make you right, you know. You think you’re the main character in some teen drama?” “Hahaha…” Her words sent a new wave of laughter through the class. I didn't know where to go. I just knew I couldn't stay in that room. After I left, Dan said, “Alright, that’s enough. Claire’s sensitive. She won’t do it again after this. I’ll apologize to you on her behalf, Jessica. Don’t hold it against her.” A flash of jealousy crossed Jessica’s eyes, but she just grinned playfully. “Aww, Dan, are you getting soft on your little wifey?” The others hooted with laughter. Dan’s face hardened. “Don’t be stupid. Our families are neighbors. I have to look out for her.” A skinny guy scoffed. “If you ask me, the only reason Claire acts like this is because you always have her back, Dan. You’re too good to her, and that’s why she’s such a princess. I say you need to teach her a real lesson.” Jessica’s eyes glinted. A plan was forming. She kept her tone light and casual. “Dan, don’t get mad at me for saying this, but we’ve all put up with a lot from her for your sake. I’m the victim here, and while I can let it go, you have to teach her a lesson.” “Otherwise,” she added, “she’ll just keep doing it, thinking you’ll always protect her.” Dan gritted his teeth and nodded. “Fine. I’ll give everyone a proper resolution to this.” Jessica barely suppressed a triumphant smile. “Great. We’ll all be watching. No backing out.” Before Dan could reply, she turned to the other boys. “This is what these girls are like. So shortsighted, so petty, so jealous. They make a storm out of nothing. You guys are so much easier to hang out with.” “Yeah, women are all like that,” someone agreed. “Totally. Except for our Jessica, of course. She’s different.” “She’s not even like a girl, hahaha!” They all laughed, but a flicker of fury crossed Jessica’s face as she snuck a glance at Dan. When she saw him smiling along with them, the jealousy and resentment in her heart burned even hotter. From that day on, Dan and I were in a cold war. And Jessica, for some reason, started targeting me even more relentlessly. “Whoa, Claire! Is that a cartoon keychain on your backpack? Do you think you’re a magical girl or something?” she’d jeer, striking a dramatic transformation pose. The boys around her would howl with laughter. After lunch, I’d wipe down my desk, a habit I’d always had. Jessica would roll her eyes. “God, Claire, you’re so extra. You think you’re the only clean person in this entire class?” “If you think we’re so dirty, why don’t you just get a private tutor? What are you even doing in a class with us?” At that, the glares from the other girls in the class grew sharper. During our weekly seat change, I struggled to move my stack of books. Jessica leaned her elbow on the remaining pile, her voice a sickly sweet imitation of a damsel in distress. “Oh, I’m so exhausted! Is there not a single loyal servant willing to carry these books for our dear Princess?” “Hahahahaha…” The entire classroom erupted. The sound was sharp, piercing, drilling into my brain. Some laughed so hard they doubled over, even mimicking the way I struggled with the books. Dan didn't turn around, but he mumbled, “That’s enough.” Jessica shot him a dramatic eye-roll. “Alright, alright. Someone’s getting protective again.” Dan snapped back, annoyed. “Who’s protective? The last person I’d ever feel sorry for is that spoiled brat!” Jessica grinned. “Hey, we’re just trying to toughen her up. She’s too introverted, always getting stuck in her own head. How’s she ever going to survive in the real world?” Dan hesitated. “But… isn’t it okay for a girl to be a little sensitive?” Jessica immediately punched him lightly on the arm. “Hey! Who are you looking down on? I’m not like that!” Dan looked at her then, his eyes filled with a warmth and trust that sent a sharp, physical pain lancing through my chest. I thought if I just ignored them, Jessica would eventually leave me alone. But after a month of the cold war, it was Dan who gave in first. “Claire,” he said, catching me after class. “Please don’t be mad anymore. Don’t ignore me.” He looked at me with such sad, pleading eyes, like a puppy left out in the rain. In that moment, my resolve crumbled. I couldn’t ignore him forever. He was my childhood best friend. We had promised to go to high school together, to go to college together. I couldn’t just abandon him here. With that thought, we made up. Our bond was an extension of our parents’ friendship. Before we could even form memories, Dan and I were sharing a crib. We grew up, went to kindergarten together, and were even the flower girl and ring bearer at a family friend’s wedding. After we’d delivered the rings, the photographer started snapping pictures of the newlyweds. The happy couple seemed to glow under the lights. Dan squeezed my hand and said to me, his voice serious, “One day, I want Claire to be my bride. An even prettier one than her.” We didn’t understand what it meant to be together, or what a bride and groom were. We just happily ran to our parents and announced our plans, earning a wave of fond laughter. Dan’s mom was a gentle, kind woman. She stroked my hair and said, “Well, then I’d better be extra nice to my future daughter-in-law, before some other little rascal steals her away.” We held hands on the way to school until we hit elementary school, when the vague awareness of boys and girls began to dawn, and we finally let go. That was when the chubby kid behind me started teasing me. “Dan’s little shadow, holding hands on the way to school, shame, shame, shame!” He and his gang of little boys cornered me after class, mocking and poking at me. Dan charged into the fray like a warrior, wielding a chair, tearing into the group of boys with a ferocity that stunned them. When it was over, he stood over them, battered but victorious, and warned, “Claire is my little sister. If any of you mess with her, you’re messing with me!” We both got our parents called in that day. As Dan walked silently behind his mom, I was wracked with guilt, not knowing what to do besides cry. Suddenly, Dan slipped a piece of candy into my mouth. It was a sour plum candy, tart and sweet at the same time. And just like that, we were back to normal. Or so it seemed. I still waited for him with his jacket at the basketball court. We still walked home together under the streetlights. The only difference was Jessica’s occasional, lingering stares, which were always followed by a burst of laughter from her and the boys around her. The sound made me feel exposed and anxious, as if I had done something ridiculous without realizing it. I told Dan how I felt. He just frowned. “I think you’re overthinking it. They’re just joking around.” Seeing the look on my face, he softened. “Okay, okay. I’ll talk to them. I’ll tell them not to do it in front of you anymore.” He walked over to Jessica. She threw her hands up and announced to the room, “Now we’re not even allowed to laugh? Who does she think she is, a Disney princess? Does she think everyone is watching her 24/7?!” “Jessica!” Dan snapped. She pouted and shot me a venomous glare. During that time, Jessica’s voice, her actions, and the malice hidden beneath them were like invisible hands, slapping me across the face again and again. The whispers that followed her words were like the rustling of a thousand insects crawling over my skin in the dark. And in the middle of those unbearable days, Dan confessed his love for me.
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