When I was eighteen, I was in a horrible car crash on my way to take my college entrance exams. They saved my life, but I couldn't hear a thing afterward. Three years after the official diagnosis of deafness, my hearing suddenly came back. I was just about to share the incredible news with my family. My stepmom, Susan, came home and gave me a hug like always. She smiled and signed "I love you," But then she turned away, and I heard her clear as day, whispering to my stepbrother, "Why isn't this deaf girl dead yet?" 1. "Dinner's ready!" Susan, her housedress a bit messy, hurried past me carrying plates of food. The TV was blaring some loud daytime talk show nearby. Kevin, my stepbrother, sprawled at the dining table and immediately pulled the steaming plate of buffalo wings right in front of himself. He licked his fork, poked through the pile a few times, and finally picked out the biggest ones for his plate with satisfaction. "Mom, you forgot again. She's deaf, she can't hear you," he said. Then, sharp, mocking laughter from both of them filled my ears. I quietly walked over and sat down, forcing the same harmless smile I always wore for them, but I couldn't stop trembling slightly. Susan turned to me, beaming. She put a piece of still-warm beef in my bowl and signed for me to eat it while it was hot. Kevin poked at his rice, pouting. "Mom, how come you gave her such a big piece of meat? You didn't even give me any yet." "That piece fell on the floor earlier," Susan said loudly, not caring that I was sitting right there. "Waste not, want not, might as well feed it to the deaf girl. Mom will find you a better piece." I managed a bitter smile. Right, why would she care? I was just a deaf girl who couldn't hear anything. If my hearing hadn't come back, I would have actually believed she loved me, just like I’d always imagined. After the accident, I was stuck in a hospital room for two solid months. My dad isn't some CEO, but he's high up in his company and always busy, traveling constantly. It was Susan who stayed by my side 24/7, taking care of everything. That's why I recovered so quickly. In my heart, I'd started thinking of her as my real mom. I never imagined such an ugly personality hiding behind that kind, friendly face. It was all a lie. Staring at the greasy piece of beef in my bowl, which looked like it might still have floor dust on it, made me feel sick. My appetite vanished. I put down my fork and went back to my room to lie down. A little while later, Kevin barged straight into my room without knocking. He yelled back towards the door while completely ransacking my closet, "Mom, did you accidentally put my black t-shirt in the deaf girl's closet again?" My personal clothes were just tossed onto the floor, some even got stepped on by Kevin. Maybe the old me, the quiet me, could have tolerated it. But now, having heard what they said at the dinner table, a fire ignited inside me. I rushed over and shoved him hard, making him stumble back. He seemed shocked that quiet little me would actually get angry. He stared for a moment before snapping, "What the hell is wrong with you?" I glared at him fiercely and signed, asking why he came in without knocking. He reacted like I'd told the world's funniest joke, his eyes filled with undisguised contempt. "Yeah, right, like knocking would make a difference for you? It's not like a deaf girl can hear. You putting on airs now or something?" He went right back to rummaging through my closet. He was right. I almost forgot I was deaf before. Knocking meant nothing to me then. But I was still furious. I lunged at him, and we started grappling. Predictably, given the difference in strength, I was quickly losing. He even managed to slap me across the face a couple of times. Susan rushed in from outside, her heeled slippers clicking. One of those heels landed right on my hand. I sucked in a sharp breath from the pain, but she acted like she hadn't felt a thing, just helping Kevin up without even glancing at me. The back of my hand throbbed, almost numb, and a little blood seeped out. Just as anger made my scalp tingle, Kevin scrambled up from the floor. He grabbed a wad of clothing to wipe his greasy hands – he hadn't washed up after dinner. When he unfolded it, he realized it was my underwear. With disgust, he threw it right in my face. Susan pushed Kevin out of my room. "Go wash your hands, son. Touching the deaf girl's stuff is bad luck." 2 After shutting the door, I curled up on my bed. Pale moonlight streamed in through the window. My memories of my real mother stopped around when I was five. I remember she had long, shiny black hair. Whenever I fell, she’d pull a piece of candy from her pocket and pop it into my mouth with a smile. She died from an illness later. Less than six months after that, Dad brought Susan and a very young Kevin home. He told me, "From now on, this is your mom and your brother." I remember Susan kneeling down, stroking my head, and saying, "Your mommy doesn't want you anymore. Let me be your mommy now." Then she took my hand and swore to Dad she’d treat me just like her own child. Susan, is this how you treat me like your own? Even though my hearing was back, I figured after years of not speaking, it would take time to talk fluently like a normal person. I had wanted to share the joy of my recovery with them, but now I realized it probably wouldn't be good news for them. So, I decided to keep it a secret for now. Late that night, I got thirsty and wanted to get a glass of water from the kitchen. As I reached for my door, I saw through the crack that Susan and Kevin were sitting in the living room, talking. Even the dim light couldn't hide the nastiness on Susan’s face. "That useless burden," she spat. "All she does is lie around the house costing money. Her mother died young, and she’s a deaf girl. It’s a real shame that car crash didn't kill her." "Why don't we just marry her off?" Kevin suggested. "That guy Danny from down the street seems like a good fit. They can look after each other." "My brilliant boy, always full of ideas! A dummy and a deaf girl, a match made in heaven, right?" They both burst out laughing, practically spitting with glee. The Danny Kevin mentioned was the neighborhood character, known for being… slow. Apparently, he’d had a high fever as a kid that left him impaired. He spent his days shuffling around, picking through trash cans downstairs. You could smell him from ten feet away. I just didn't expect Susan to move so fast. The very next day, she invited Danny over to our house. Facing Danny, who had drool staining the front of his shirt, I couldn't understand how Susan managed such a fake, kind smile. She kept piling food onto his plate, telling him to eat up. Then she turned to me, signing that Danny was actually quite handsome, just a bit immature, but clearly the type who would take good care of someone. My dear stepmother, where exactly do you see caring potential? In his matted hair that hadn't seen shampoo in days, or the grimy collar of his shirt crusted with who-knows-what? I pretended not to understand her implication, forced a smile, nodded, and kept my head down, shoveling rice into my mouth. 3 Just sitting through one meal with Danny made my skin crawl, like invisible bugs were crawling all over me. I quickly grabbed clean clothes and headed to the bathroom for a shower. Wouldn't you know it, just then, the power went out – a breaker tripped. I poked my head out, wrapped in a towel, about to ask Susan what was going on. She immediately pulled me out of the bathroom – me, without my clothes properly on – spun around, went into the bathroom herself, and locked the door from the inside. Suddenly, in the dark, silent house, a pair of clammy hands touched my back. I jumped, spinning around to see Danny grinning, showing his yellow teeth, staring at me. "S-so white," he stammered. Terrified, I stumbled backward and fell to the floor. He pulled a tiny flashlight from his pocket – probably salvaged from some trash can – and shone it all over my naked body. He reached out, trying to touch my chest. In a panic, I kicked him hard right between the legs. He doubled over, howling, and collapsed onto the floor, making such a racket it sounded like he was about to die. Hearing the commotion, Susan finally decided to emerge from the bathroom. She signed an explanation, saying she suddenly had terrible stomach cramps and absolutely had to use the toilet, and she never expected something like this to happen. But I clearly saw the smirk playing on her lips. Dad was often away on business trips all over the country. When he finally came home for a break, before he could even sit down properly, I ran to him crying, signing frantically about everything Susan had done to me lately. But before I could finish explaining, Susan’s eyes welled up. She clutched Dad's sleeve and sat beside him, sobbing. "Chloe, how could you accuse me like this? I know I'm not your birth mother, but I truly think of you as my daughter!" Seeing her tear-streaked face, Dad melted. He asked her what was really going on. Looking utterly wronged, she lifted her teary eyes. "Honey, when Chloe was in the hospital, I took care of her every need. She is my child. How could I possibly mistreat her?" She continued, "Ever since the accident, Chloe's mental state seems to have gotten worse. I read online that these might be symptoms of persecutory delusions. Maybe we should take her to a hospital for a proper check-up?" She was banking on me being unable to speak or hear her blatant lies to Dad, wasn't she? I lunged at her, grabbing a handful of her hair and pulling. Dad saw me acting "crazy" and quickly pulled me back. It was true, Susan had been incredibly devoted when I was in the hospital. Not just outsiders, even I had been completely fooled. Looking back now, it was probably all an act, a performance put on specifically for my dad. "Chloe, you need to rest properly lately," Dad signed, his face weary. "Your stepmom works hard managing the house. Don't be disrespectful, and don't cause trouble." He finished signing and then led Susan into their bedroom. My dad had always been protective. But this time, I realized, the person he was protecting wasn't me anymore. I ran back to my room and slammed the door, shutting out all the chaos behind me. Persecutory delusions? Susan might as well have just called me clinically insane. Fine. Since you're so eager to push me and Danny together, maybe I should arrange for you to end up in Danny's bed. Let's see how you like the experience firsthand.
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