After my ex-boyfriend dumped me for a master manipulator, I furiously hunted her down. She was fully made up, cowering and begging me not to hit her in the face. I slapped my hands together in a pleading gesture: "Sister, what kind of dark magic did you use to make that cheapskate buy you designer bags and clothes, when I couldn't even get him to buy me a cup of boba tea?!" She let out a long sigh of relief and proceeded to teach me exactly how to hook a wealthy "sucker." Later, I brought a man to her to show off my homework. She stuttered, "B-brother? You're the sucker?!" 1 Lately, my best friend and designated dating strategist had descended into a state of severe cognitive dissonance. She would exhibit two violently contradictory attitudes toward the exact same behavior. It all started when she and I simultaneously entered the "dating" phase of our lives. My boyfriend's name was Arthur Sterling. He was shy, introverted, gentle, and incredibly rational. I had never met Chloe's brother, but based on her descriptions, he was a stingy, short-tempered, absolute idiot. Chloe was currently incredibly annoyed. Her foolish—but undeniably wealthy—brother had been ensnared by a highly skilled gold digger. "Can you believe this? That woman literally just sends my brother links and demands he buy her gifts." When I saw that message, my eyes went wide. Because just two days ago, for my birthday, I had asked Chloe for advice. She had specifically instructed me to just send my boyfriend links and demand gifts. Me: "Uh... Chloe, but that's exactly what I did." Chloe replied instantly: "Sister, how can you possibly compare yourself to that scheming bitch?" I stared at my phone screen, genuinely questioning where Chloe's moral compass actually pointed. Then came Valentine's Day. Arthur and I were out on a date, and Chloe started aggressively spamming my WeChat. "You've only been dating for three months! Do NOT spend the night with him!" "I'm begging you! If you do, it's all over! AHHHHH!" My phone wouldn't stop buzzing. Arthur looked down, gripping his knife and fork. The sound of him cutting his steak suddenly seemed incredibly loud and grating. On Valentine's night, getting relentlessly bombarded with messages while on a date made it look exactly like I was juggling multiple guys. I frantically tried to explain: "It's a female friend! She might have an emergency, she needs me to go back and help her." Under Arthur's scrutinizing, analytical gaze, I awkwardly grabbed my phone and practically sprinted away from the terrace restaurant. As I speed-walked, I sent Chloe a voice memo: "Baby, I promise, I am sleeping in my dorm tonight. I'll video call you later, okay?" Just as Arthur drove past me, he happened to hear me say that. His hands froze on the steering wheel. His expression wasn't great, but he managed to keep his emotions relatively stable. "I'll drive you back." A few days later, Chloe came to me with more gossip. "Oh my god, my brother is so pathetic. He spent a fortune on that woman, and she actually cheated on him on Valentine's Day." "Her game is terrifyingly advanced. She scams them for their money and their hearts, but she never actually sleeps with them." I stared at my phone, letting out a long, heavy sigh. I had absolutely zero interest in Chloe's unlucky brother. I was much more concerned with my own disastrous situation. "Chloe, ever since you made me go back on Valentine's Day, my boyfriend has completely ignored me." Chloe sent a shocked reaction sticker: "Tsk. A man like that is absolute trash." She launched into a creative tirade, explaining how typical it was for men to expect women to throw themselves at them, and then throw a tantrum when they don't get what they want. "Dump him immediately. The next one will be more obedient." Huh? Dump him just like that? We hadn't even been dating for that long! 2 The only reason I even knew someone like Chloe existed was entirely thanks to my ex-boyfriend, Liam. When Liam and I dated, he insisted on splitting the bill for everything—even two cups of boba tea. My friends constantly mocked me for being hopelessly, blindly in love. Right as I was finally preparing to dump him, he beat me to the punch and initiated the breakup. He claimed he had found "true love." That true love was Chloe. I heard he bought Chloe designer bags, expensive clothes, and even maxed out his credit cards to buy her a Van Cleef & Arpels bracelet. Liam broke up with me because Chloe firmly stated she refused to be pursued by a man who already had a girlfriend. Bad news travels fast. I quickly became the biggest laughingstock on campus. That little master manipulator, Chloe, had delivered a fatal, humiliating blow. Furious, I tracked Chloe down at a nightclub. She was leaning toward the bathroom mirror, touching up her makeup. She was wearing a full Chanel suit, radiating the scent of expensive camellia perfume. Even her hair looked impeccably, meticulously styled. She looked incredibly expensive. "Sister, I'm Liam's ex-girlfriend." Chloe frowned slightly, thinking for a long moment before it finally clicked. She parted her lips slightly: "Oh, you mean that grad student from University A?" She turned off the faucet, looking straight into the mirror without even glancing at me, and asked lazily what I wanted. I didn't say a word. I just slowly walked toward her. Chloe was petite and delicate. If a physical fight broke out, she definitely wouldn't stand a chance against me. She backed into the corner, covering her face with her hands, slowly sliding down the wall. "Sister, I swear I didn't lead him on! If you're going to hit me, please don't hit my face!" Uh... why was she so easily terrified? I grabbed her arm and yanked her up. She stood frozen against the wall for a second. I slapped my hands together in a pleading gesture, looking at her with desperate, puppy-dog eyes. "Sister, what kind of dark magic did you use to make that cheapskate buy you designer bags and clothes, when I couldn't even get him to buy me a cup of boba tea?!" Chloe bent over, letting out a massive sigh of relief: "Sister! Why didn't you just say so?! Is that all this is about?!" "Waaaaah, I seriously want to know so badly!" 3 Chloe and I instantly clicked, bonding over our mutual frustration. She held nothing back, teaching me everything she knew. She said this kind of thing required intuition; it couldn't just be explained with words. But since I was her very first disciple, she promised to provide full, hands-on guidance. She told me to go find an experimental subject first. "Sister, are there any specific requirements for this experimental subject?" A confident smirk curled Chloe's lips. She shook her head mysteriously: "Just make sure he's handsome. The more handsome, the better." It's that simple?! I added Chloe on WeChat and decided to head back and hunt for a suitable subject. The moment I walked out the door, I spotted the perfect candidate. A man stepped out of a car. He was tall, lean, and radiated an aura of aloof impatience. Seeing him from a distance, Chloe's voice immediately echoed in my head: The more handsome, the better. This was clearly a gift from the heavens. I sprinted over and blocked his path. "Brother, can I get your WeChat?" Hearing me call him "brother," the man's brow immediately furrowed in deep annoyance. He flatly stated he didn't use WeChat and tried to walk past me. I quickly grabbed his arm. I couldn't let him escape! "Well, I see you have a mouth. Can we make out then?" I tried my absolute best to force an innocent, harmless smile. His eyes widened in absolute shock, clearly wondering if he was hallucinating: "Uh... I do have WeChat. You can add me." He seemed to be in a rush. While repeatedly apologizing, I dutifully scanned his QR code and added him. He actually found my flustered apologies amusing: "It's fine. Take your time." He was surprisingly gentle. I couldn't stop myself from blushing, my head spinning slightly. Getting a handsome guy's WeChat was step one. That night, I started chatting with him. "Hi. Did you have fun today?" After a very long time, he finally replied. "I wasn't there to have fun. I was looking for my sister." The silence in my room was deafening. This guy seemed like a complete creep. I mean, honesty is great, but generally speaking, it's advised not to be that blatant about looking for a hookup. But I replied instantly anyway. "So, did you find her?" "Of course I found her. I even brought her home." I hesitated for exactly three seconds before blocking him. This one was a dud. All style, absolutely zero substance. 4 The next day, I ran into this handsome creep right at the gates of my university. He stood there in a fully tailored suit, sticking out like a sore thumb among the sea of college students. Girls walking by kept stealing glances at him, but he seemed completely oblivious to their stares, muttering constantly to himself. "Remember, I was looking for my actual sister, not a 'sister'." (T/N: In Chinese slang, "sister" or "meimei" can mean a young woman one is casually dating or hooking up with, similar to "baby" or "shawty".) When he spotted me in the crowd, I immediately turned to run, but he sprinted over and blocked my path. "I'm sorry. I phrased it poorly yesterday. I was looking for my actual, biological sister. We share the same parents." He tapped his phone screen, pulling up our chat history. "You blocked me. I thought about it for a long time, and I even asked my sister. She told me you probably misunderstood. Can you please unblock me now?" I stared at him blankly, pulled out my phone, and removed him from my block list. His eyes lit up slightly. He reminded me to keep in touch, and then turned to leave. I was speechless. He came to my campus first thing in the morning just to demand I unblock him so we could 'keep in touch'? I called out to him: "Um, it's lunchtime. Do you want to grab something to eat?" I suddenly realized I didn't even know his name. "I'm Mia. What's your name?" "Arthur Sterling." Arthur had seen the background photo on my WeChat profile, which happened to be the iconic landmark of University A. Arthur intended to take me out to eat, asking if I preferred Japanese, Korean, Thai, or Chinese cuisine. I took him to a cheap hotpot joint. Chloe had specifically taught me: Take rich guys to eat cheap food, and take broke guys to eat expensive food. The key is providing a highly differentiated experience. Based on Arthur's outfit, he definitely wasn't broke. I ordered a super spicy beef tallow broth and looked at Arthur expectantly. He pressed his lips together tightly, then looked back at me. Under my eager gaze, he carefully used his chopsticks to pick up a single slice of meat, rinsed it three times in a glass of plain water, took one bite, and instantly started coughing uncontrollably. I had no idea he couldn't handle spicy food. I watched helplessly as he coughed so hard he triggered a severe stomach cramp, and I ended up having to rush him to the hospital. While I was at the nurses' station paying Arthur's medical bill, I unexpectedly ran into Chloe. Her brother happened to be hospitalized here too. Chloe asked me conspiratorially: "Wasn't that guy from last time a total creep? My brother is currently single. Want me to introduce him to you so you can practice?" Who sets their own brother up like that?! And why did she call it 'practice'?! Chloe sighed helplessly: "My brother is an absolute idiot with way too much money, he's just a bit on the older side. But he's still a prime target. Better to let you benefit than some random stranger." I declined Chloe's offer: "Never mind. That handsome guy from before wasn't a creep; it was just a misunderstanding on my end." Chloe looked deeply confused: "How do you 'misunderstand' someone being a creep? Is your brain malfunctioning again?" "Sister, I really feel like this one is different." After all, even when Arthur was clutching his stomach in absolute agony, he still aggressively insisted on paying the hotpot bill before we left. Chloe severely criticized my judgment, then demanded I take her to see this supposed creep. "Mia, you are completely hopeless. I need to see what kind of guy has you this mesmerized." I sighed. "Shouldn't you go check on your brother first?" Chloe smiled and gestured for me to lead the way: "It's a chronic issue; he won't die. Your situation is much more urgent. Lead the way." Unable to argue with Chloe, I led her to Arthur's room. "Just take a quick look from a distance. Don't scare him; he's very introverted." "Mia, feeling sorry for a man is the quickest way to guarantee a lifetime of misery." I brought Chloe to the door of the hospital room. She peeked her head in to look. Suddenly, she gasped: "Holy shit! I see my brother!" 5 Chloe immediately ducked out of sight in a panic. I was intensely curious about what her brother looked like, but there were four people in the shared room. Which one was her brother? Arthur was sitting on his hospital bed, clutching a thermos, quietly drinking water. Ah, he's so cute. Meanwhile, Chloe was crouching on the floor, muttering: "What is wrong with him? Why is he staying in a shared room?" Hearing that, I looked at the patient in the bed furthest inside. He looked significantly older and was loudly complaining and expressing his intense dissatisfaction. His yelling even startled Arthur in the adjacent bed, making him look visibly uncomfortable and anxious. I glanced down at Chloe: "Aren't you going to go in and calm your brother down? He seems incredibly irritable." "You think he's irritable too, right? If I go in there, I'm just asking to get yelled at. Let's just pretend I was never here." Chloe wanted to bolt, but I wasn't about to leave. I rolled up my sleeves, fully prepared to go teach her brother a lesson in basic human decency. Chloe whispered frantically: "Don't, don't! My brother absolutely despises it when people create loud noises in public spaces!" Excuse me? He has the audacity to complain about that?! What a hypocrite! I raised my foot, kicked the door open, and marched right in. Chloe's face drained of color. She let out a tiny shriek and sprinted away in absolute terror. I pointed directly at the older man: "You! Yeah, you! If you don't like shared rooms, go pay for a private suite! What the hell are you yelling about?! Everyone else can handle it, why can't you?!" Dead silence fell over the room. After a long pause, the man muttered weakly: "I wasn't yelling... my IV infiltrated and the vein swelled up. I was trying to call the nurse." Arthur was staring at me in absolute shock. Actually, everyone in the room was staring at me in absolute shock. Well, this was incredibly awkward. I blame the hospital doors for being too soundproof. I pressed my lips together, forcing a painfully awkward smile, and took large strides toward the man's bed. He looked terrified and scooted backward. I reached out and pressed the call button above his bed. "It's fine, sir. Just press this button next time." The man swallowed hard, pulled his blanket up to hide his face, and mumbled: "Thank you." I turned around. SWISH! Every single patient violently yanked their privacy curtains shut. Except Arthur. I looked at him. He hesitantly held up his thermos: "You must be thirsty. Do you want some water?" I wanted to cry. I took a few deep breaths: "I am so sorry. I misunderstood the situation. I thought he was complaining about being in a shared room..." Arthur looked incredibly uneasy, avoiding my gaze: "I don't think anyone is going to dare complain about anything anymore." I sighed, took the thermos from him, and took a sip. Arthur's hand holding his paper cup froze mid-air. I immediately started coughing violently. 6 Ever since the hospital incident, things between Arthur and me had become even more awkward. There was absolutely zero romantic tension. But he definitely had some level of interest in me. In the chaotic, noisy food street near the university, Arthur sat across from me, eating his noodles with elegant, aristocratic restraint. This was already the third time this week he had come to find me for lunch. And it was only Wednesday. He came every single day, but he barely spoke. The few sentences we exchanged proved we had absolutely nothing in common, and our tastes in food were entirely opposite. But he was wealthy, handsome, and we were a perfect match. I sighed internally. It was just so incredibly difficult to make any progress. Suddenly, someone pushed open the door, marched directly over to our table, and slammed two cups of boba tea down in front of us. I looked up from my noodle bowl in complete shock. It was my recently acquired ex-boyfriend, Liam. I immediately started coughing violently. Does anyone understand the lethal, agonizing level of second-hand embarrassment I was experiencing?! Liam was the type of ex who made you feel profound, intense shame for ever having dated him. Before Liam could even open his mouth, I grabbed him and sprinted wildly toward the door. Arthur froze, frowning slightly. I peaked back to check Arthur's reaction, while Liam spoke up beside me: "Mia, let's get back together." I waved my hands frantically: "Absolutely not necessary. If you never show your face in front of me again, I'll be eternally grateful. You don't need to feel guilty; it was an amicable breakup. If there's nothing else, please leave." Liam followed my gaze and saw Arthur, immaculately dressed in a tailored suit, paying the bill at the counter. He let out a cold scoff: "Mia, the second you broke up with me, you immediately found a rich guy, didn't you? You never actually loved me. You just hated that I didn't have the money to buy you expensive gifts. Pretending to be a good girlfriend must have been exhausting for you, huh?" It was glaringly obvious. Liam had failed to win Chloe over and was now trying to crawl back to me. Normally, I wouldn't waste a single second engaging with him, but his passive-aggressive tone, combined with him aggressively playing the victim, instantly ignited my temper. "Liam, I gave you an easy out, and you're refusing to take it, huh?! What the hell are you pretending to be so noble for?! You liked Chloe! Why don't you admit it was because you liked her money?! Look at yourself! Stop acting like you're the victim here! I didn't like you because you're a massive, hypocritical cheapskate! When we were dating, you insisted on splitting the bill for two cups of boba tea, and we had to take turns paying for meals! Do you honestly think everyone else is an idiot?!" "So what?! You agreed to it! I didn't force you! At the end of the day, my only 'crime' is not having money, right?! The only reason you're sitting here keeping this guy company is because he's rich!" Liam was descending into a state of impotent, pathetic rage. I immediately fired back: "Tsk, tsk, getting defensive? I love rich guys! And it's absolutely none of your fucking business!" Arthur happened to walk out the door at the exact moment I shouted that. His footsteps faltered, his expression growing thoughtful. Liam looked incredibly smug: "Well, now you have to explain yourself to your personal ATM." Crap. I'm doomed. Arthur and I had barely just started to establish a connection, and his impression of me was tanking lower and lower. We walked down the tree-lined path in complete silence. Arthur kept glancing at me, clearly wanting to say something. I accepted my fate: "Mr. Sterling, if you have something to say, just say it." "Do you... truly love wealthy men? Approximately what net worth are we talking about? Do you have specific requirements? Could you elaborate on your criteria for a partner?" I genuinely thought I was hallucinating. I stared at him blankly. What the hell did he mean? Arthur's eyes darted away, looking completely out of his depth: "I'm not astronomically wealthy, but I have a decent amount. I was wondering if I... fall within your range of consideration?" This time, I understood perfectly. He was utilizing an incredibly bizarre method of confessing his feelings. Or, more accurately, engaging in a very formal courtship ritual. I had never experienced anything like this. If I told him I didn't actually care about money right now, it would probably break his heart. "Uh... I think... your net worth is exactly perfect." God knows what his actual net worth is, because I was 100% focused entirely on his face. Arthur's eyes lit up brightly: "So, does this mean we're officially in a relationship?" I cupped my cheeks, nodding twice rapidly, my face burning bright red. He is so incredibly cute. Ah—I'm literally dying.
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