I was so dumb. Dumb enough that when my husband brought another woman home, I thought he found me a new playmate. After all, Ethan was the first person who chased away my bullies and was willing to marry me. That is, until he brought his mistress home again and laughed while telling her, "She's a dimwit. She won't make a scene, and she won't cry." This time, I didn't laugh with him. Chapter 1 I stared down at the floor, twisting my fingers, watching the ash from his cigarette drift down. "Get out," I said softly, as light as the ash itself. "What did you say?" Ethan cocked his head, looking into my eyes, smiling as he asked. Every time he thought I said something funny, he'd look at me like that. I counted the planks on the wooden floor. One, two, three... When I got to the sixth, I said, "This is my room. You two get out." The woman hugged him from behind. "Babe, what are you still doing? I can't wait." I remembered her name was Linda. She was Ethan's secretary. Her voice always sounded strange, like she was deliberately tightening her throat. Ethan stubbed out his cigarette on the doorframe and kissed her neck. "Hold on, can't you see someone's causing trouble?" He turned back and patted my head. This time he patted it hard, making my head wobble. "Be a good girl and go sleep in the guest room tonight. Tomorrow, I'll take you to buy a new dress." I looked up, my gaze landing on a scar on his collarbone. It was from a fight he got into for me. He used a beer bottle to smash the head of a guy who tried to pull my pants down. A shard of glass had cut him too. Blood dripped onto my hand, warm. I stared at that blood for a long time. Until he scolded me, "Little dummy, don't you know how to be scared?" Now, that red scar rose and fell gently with his breathing. Next to it was a smear of lipstick, a different shade of red. I said his name, emphasizing each syllable, "E-than." "I'm not going to the guest room." He frowned. "Don't make a scene. Listen to me." I spoke slowly, "My room. My bed. You two get out." Linda covered her mouth and giggled. Ethan's face darkened. He stopped petting my head and instead grabbed my arm, pulling me out of the room. "What the hell is wrong with you? Why are you annoying me right now?" He was strong, and I had no choice but to be dragged along. One of my slippers fell off, and my bare foot slapped against the cold floor, slap, slap, slap. The hallway lights were dim, shining on our wedding photo on the wall. In the photo, he was looking down and kissing my forehead, while I stared at the camera with wide eyes and a blank expression. The photographer had said, "Bride, give us a smile." I tried hard to pull the corners of my mouth up. But Ethan said, "Nah, don't smile. It's better like this. Pure." Now I knew what he probably meant was, "purely stupid." Stupid enough that no one would respect me. Chapter 2 Ethan dragged me to the door of the guest room and tried to shove me inside. I braced myself against the doorframe. My fingers dug into the wood, my knuckles turning white. This action required a lot of coordination. My brain had to command my fingers to bend, my arms to use strength, and my feet to stand firm. For me, it was like commanding a disobedient army. It was tiring and slow. But I did it. Ethan looked at me in surprise. He probably didn't expect me to resist. All these years, I had never resisted him. I ate what he told me to eat. I wore what he told me to wear. I smiled when he told me to smile. "June, that's enough. Stop being stupid," he called me by my full name, impatience in his voice. I looked up and met his eyes. "I am not stupid. I am just slow to react. But I remember." "March 17th, 11:00 PM. You said you were discussing business. Lipstick stain on your shirt, brownish-red." "June 9th, 3:00 PM. You said you were on a business trip. Hotel photo. The shadows and the angle of the sun didn't match." "August..." "Shut the hell up! What kind of weird habit is this!?" Ethan yanked me into the room and threw me onto the bed. He glared at me fiercely and left, slamming the door shut. The lock clicked. He had locked it from the outside. The light in the guest room was broken. It was dark, with no color. He probably didn't remember the light was broken, or maybe he didn't remember I was afraid of the dark. I was scared. Curled up at the head of the bed, I said to the closed door, "Ethan. Divorce." "Let's get a divorce." Chapter 3 The next morning, the housekeeper let me out. When I went downstairs, Ethan was sitting at the dining table reading a newspaper. Linda was next to him, eating porridge. She was sitting in my seat, using my small flowered bowl. "Good morning, sister." She held the spoon in her mouth and blinked at me. "My bowl." I stared at the small flowered bowl. Her eyes widened, and her mouth dropped open. She looked ridiculous. "Sorry, sister. I'm pregnant with Ethan's baby. Ethan said everything in the house belongs to me and the baby. I thought he had told you too." Ethan looked at her adoringly and didn't say anything. She rubbed her belly. "Sister's strange illness is hereditary, so she can't have children. I'm suffering in sister's place. I'm just using your bowl and chopsticks. Sister isn't that stingy, right?" I looked down and counted my toes. Five on the left foot, five on the right foot. Ten in total. "The chopsticks are Ethan's. The bowl is mine. Mom gave it to me." When I was little, my mom used this bowl to feed me. After she died, I used this bowl to eat by myself. Ethan frowned. "June, cut the crap. We're all family. Why are you being so petty?" Linda gently patted Ethan twice, stood up, held the bowl, and walked up to me. "This bowl is quite unique. Can you give it to me, sister? Let my baby share some of your blessings." I shook my head. "No blessings. Mom is gone." Ethan's face darkened. "June, what the hell are you talking about? Why are you saying such unlucky things?" Linda squeezed out a sweet smile. "It's okay, Ethan. Sister is intellectually disabled. She doesn't know what she's saying. I don't mind." "Give it back." I reached out to grab the bowl. The small flowered bowl slipped from her hands, fell to the floor, and shattered. She screamed and fell to the ground, pushing me in the process. I fell too, and it hurt a little. Then she sat on the floor and started crying. "What's going on?" Ethan's face changed, and he stood up. He stepped over me and hugged Linda. Linda buried her face in his shoulder and cried, pears bathed in rain. "Ethan... she, she suddenly attacked me... her mind isn't right to begin with, I... I'm scared..." "I was afraid she would hurt the baby... I just wanted to protect our child..." Ethan patted her head with heartache and didn't even glance at me. "Don't be scared, baby isn't scared. It's okay now. I'm here." He used to say similar things to me when it thundered. He picked up Linda and ordered the housekeeper, "Call an ambulance, quick!" Then he pointed his finger at me. "June, if anything happens to the child, I will never forgive you!" The housekeeper walked over carefully. "Ma'am, you first..." "I am not 'Ma'am' anymore." Ethan was stunned for a moment, but he continued to hold Linda and left without looking back. I climbed up, endured the pain, and began to pick up the broken pieces. One piece, two pieces, three pieces... Chapter 4 I lay on the hospital bed, looking out the window and listening to the noise outside the ward. "Yes, Mrs. Chen suffers from Kabuki syndrome and skeletal dysplasia. This time it's only a minor fracture. If there are no other problems, she can go home after it's set. She needs to be very careful in the future and cannot..." "Who asked about her? How's Linda? Is the pregnancy affected?" "Ms. Linda currently shows no problems..." "Then check again! If there's even the slightest problem with the mother or child, I'll hold you responsible!" After a while, it became quiet outside. A young doctor walked into the ward. He wore a light blue shirt under his white coat and thin-rimmed glasses. "Mrs. Chen, I am your attending physician. My name is Gu, Dr. Gu." "June." I spoke slowly. "I am June. Not Mrs. Chen." Dr. Gu raised an eyebrow, smiled, and nodded. "Alright, Ms. June. May I examine you?" "Okay." He took out a small flashlight and carefully observed my eyes. "Any dizziness?" "A little." He took out several cards with patterns on them. "Can you tell me what's drawn on these?" "I don't know." Dr. Gu was startled. "You can... try to interpret them in your own way." I took the cards and placed them where the light was even. I told him the color code corresponding to each color block. His expression gradually became solemn. "Besides color, what else are you sensitive to?" I thought for a while. "Time. Memory. I remember every second. Remember the traces of dust." "Then from the moment I opened the door and came in until now..." "Three minutes and seven seconds... eight seconds... nine seconds..." He stood up, hurried out, and then came back with some things. I did some strange tests. He asked me to distinguish subtle frequencies and memorize complicated pattern sequences. I did them one by one. "Ms. June." Dr. Gu's expression was serious. "Your perception ability... I have never seen a similar case. I sincerely invite you to join our research institute. We need your gift. You can consider it." I didn't really understand. Since childhood, others said I was stupid, said my brain had problems. But I still agreed. "Okay. Is there a salary?" Dr. Gu didn't expect me to agree so quickly, and he nodded quickly. "Of course, I promise it will be very generous. I'll report it right away. The relevant department will definitely attach great importance to it and treat you as a treasure. I look forward to your recovery as soon as possible and becoming my colleague." "Okay." He shook hands with me in a friendly manner and stood up to leave. At the door, he suddenly turned his head again and smiled. "Your eyes are really beautiful, like they were painted." Chapter 5 After returning, I lay in the guest room again. I didn't like the guest room. But they said the master bedroom faced the sun, which was good for pregnant women. So I couldn't sleep in the master bedroom, couldn't sleep in my own bed. In the evening, Ethan came to bring me food. He carefully blew on the porridge and fed it to my mouth. "June, I know you're upset. When the child is born, I'll make him call you Mom, okay? Don't you want to be a mother?" "But for now, just stay in your room and don't go out. After Linda gives birth, I'll take you out to buy a new dress. I'll buy you all the dresses in the entire mall, okay?" I picked at the bedsheet, counting the patterns on it. One, two, three... "Small flowered bowl." Ethan's hand holding the spoon stopped. "Huh?" "Small flowered bowl broke." "It's okay, I'll order an identical one for you." I shook my head. "Not the same. Already broken." "Ethan. We divorce." The spoon fell into the bowl with a crisp clatter. "June, are you done yet? Divorce? How will you live without me? Who will care for you, feed you, dress you? Who remembers you're scared of the dark and thunder?" He reached out and grabbed my chin, forcing me to look up. "What are you fussing about? What right do you have to fuss? Can you give me children? Give birth to a fool like you? Huh?" I shook off his hand and lowered my head. "I am not a fool. Ethan. We divorce." Ethan stood up with a sneer. "June, I don't know where you learned this, but I advise you to quit while you're ahead and not push your luck." "You're a fool who doesn't even dodge or cry when hit. How long could you live without me?" "Reflect on it properly." Ethan slammed the door and left. I didn't know why he was angry. I couldn't give him children. If we divorced, he should be happy, right? He said I was a fool, wouldn't dodge, wouldn't cry. I thought he was more like a fool, not knowing what he wanted at all. But I knew what I wanted.
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