Every New Year's Eve, my boyfriend ditches me last minute for his childhood sweetheart. This year, I booked the best view, expecting to count down with him. But before the clock struck twelve, I received a text: "Stella is being forced by her mom to go on a blind date again. I'll accompany her. You go ahead and celebrate first." This time, I didn't cry or make a scene. Instead, amidst the sky full of fireworks, I said: "In the new year, Gavin, I don't want you anymore." When Gavin called, I was sleeping peacefully. "Mia, where are you? No one at the restaurant? Why didn't you wait for me?" I answered sleepily, "No need. You accompany Stella. I don't mind." Chapter 1 Hanging up the phone, I continued to sleep. Gavin came back soon, asking puzzledly: "Why are you sleeping in the guest room?" "Nothing, too sleepy. Let's talk tomorrow." I didn't even open my eyes, pulling the quilt over my head. He was relentless, "What's wrong with you? Said you didn't mind, why throw a tantrum?" I didn't make a sound. Gavin sighed, wanted to hug me, but I dodged. He froze slightly, explaining helplessly: "It's late at night, unsafe for a girl like Stella to run around..." I nodded calmly. "I really understand, no need to explain. Go take care of her." He was completely stunned, obviously not expecting this reaction from me. Stella is his childhood sweetheart, and also the hurdle Gavin and I couldn't get over in our five years of dating. Before, whenever he left me to accompany Stella, I would cry, throw tantrums, and argue with him like a shrew. But now, I'm too tired. I just want to have a good sleep. Gavin still wouldn't leave, face full of displeasure. "I explained countless times, why are you still angry?" I sighed helplessly, forcing myself to sit up despite fatigue. "I have things to do tomorrow, must sleep now. I'm really not angry." "But you clearly..." I turned off the light in the guest room directly, buried my head and slept. Gavin stood quietly for a long time, finally sighed, turned and left. In the dark, my tight nerves finally relaxed. This is our fifth New Year's Eve together, and the fifth time he stood me up. The first time, he said Stella broke the water tap and needed him to save her. I waited until the restaurant closed, waiters were getting off work. The third time, he said Stella sprained her ankle, no one to take care of her. I was provoked and mocked by a couple at the next table alone, hit by a bottle, head stitched seven stitches. This year is the fifth time. He said Stella was forced to blind date, in a bad mood. Every time it was because of her, leaving me behind. My heart, in these abandonments time after time, gradually stopped hurting. So this year, I made a wish. In the new year, I really don't want him anymore. Slept well all night, I got up early. Didn't prepare exquisite breakfast for Gavin as usual, didn't even ask for a morning kiss, just went out directly. Chapter 2 In the afternoon, while I was negotiating a contract with a client, Gavin texted. "I put Stella in a hotel last night. Today she says it's too noisy to sleep well. Can I bring her to our home?" Looking at his text, I suddenly thought of three years ago. My parents rarely came to visit me, wanted to stay in our home, but he refused. "I don't like my private life disturbed by others. Better let them stay in a hotel." My parents are "others." But Stella is not. How ridiculous. I calmly put down the phone, ignored it. Until I came home after a busy day, opened the door and saw Stella holding half a watermelon, sitting on Gavin's favorite designer sofa. Last time I accidentally dripped a drop of water on it, he said angrily "Don't touch it anymore." But now, watermelon juice dripping on the sofa surface, he was smiling dotingly on the side. Seeing me back, Gavin's smile froze. "Mia don't misunderstand, I was just afraid if I didn't let her sit, she would cry to my mom again..." I nodded indifferently, expression unchanged, "Understand, no need to explain." Gavin's expression relaxed instantly, asking me in a low voice: "Not angry anymore? What do we eat tonight?" I shrugged. "I was never angry, you just didn't believe it." He looked me up and down suspiciously, as if distinguishing if I was telling the truth. I ignored him. Just as I wanted to let them solve dinner themselves, Stella jumped onto Gavin's back. "Brother Gavin, I want to eat at Chez Pierre, take me there okay?" Gavin naturally supported her butt with his hands behind his back, responding dotingly: "Of course no problem, brother takes you." Finished speaking, remembered me, turned back asking hesitantly: "Mia, you... want to eat together?" I shook my head, face calm. "Not going. I don't like the taste there. You guys go." His brows furrowed tight, gaze hesitant: "Really? Didn't you love clamoring to eat out most? Why not go?" I looked at him calmly, smiling but silent. Five years, he never remembered, I'm allergic to the special sauce at Chez Pierre, never go there. But because Stella loves it, every time we wanted to eat out, he always chose there. I said dozens of times he didn't remember, later I stopped saying. Gavin looked at me for a long time, expression obscure. Finally turned and left. I was surprised to find myself not sad about this anymore. Even calmly ordered a favorite takeout, eating deliciously while watching a movie. Halfway, Mom called. "Baby, happy New Year?" I responded smiling: "Pretty good." Mom hesitated, after a while spoke with heartache: "Don't lie to Mom, you are unhappy right? Why spent New Year alone? Where is Gavin?" The smile on my face faded. "He went to accompany his neighbor sister. It's okay Mom, I'm used to it." Mom coaxed me for a long time before hanging up. The rice in front of me was cold. I stared blankly at the movie ending on screen, heroine said: "In this world, anyone can live without anyone." But Gavin told me countless times, "Mia, I really can't live without Stella." Vision a bit sour, but not a drop of tear. I seem to really let go of Gavin. Almost midnight, Gavin came back. He smilingly pulled down Stella's arms around his neck, pinching her cheek dotingly, "Stop messing around." Turned to see me, stunned for a moment, panic flashed in eyes. "Mia, not what you think, we..." I twitched lips indifferently. "I don't mind." He froze there for a long time, before asking uneasily. "Mia, what exactly is wrong with you?" I was about to go back to the guest room to sleep, looking puzzled, "Nothing. By the way, was the food good?" "Still that taste... but why aren't you angry?" "Why should I be angry?" Gavin choked. Couldn't say a word. Past five years, he questioned me why I was angry in my hysteria countless times. Now I'm not angry, he unaccustomedly suspects why I'm not angry. Too hard to serve. Chapter 3 After that, I left early and returned late every day, avoiding all chances to meet Gavin. Gavin asked me to a concert, I replied four hours later, "Sorry, too busy didn't hear." He wanted me to play squash with him, I refused with regret, "Client trouble, need to revise plan." He wanted couple time, candlelit dinner, I agreed then canceled, "Sorry, my best friend is sick, need to accompany." He gradually couldn't stand it, complaining everything is more important than boyfriend in my heart. I didn't refute, didn't coax him, didn't explain. After all, in his world, I'm not the most important person either. Even my home is gradually filled with traces of another woman, disgusting. I wasn't willing to torture myself anymore, submitted application for transfer to Boston branch to the company. Weekend night, I was filling out work handover form on tablet at dining table, colleague called. "Mia, you leave, what about your boyfriend?" I said lightly, "Everyone is adult, no one can't live without anyone." "You guys wouldn't... be breaking up right?" I fell silent, didn't answer. Hung up and continued filling form. Gavin, who was playing games with Stella in living room, came for water, glanced at tablet accidentally. Suddenly exploded: "Mia, you leaving New York?" I looked up, glanced at him, "Yes." Gavin stood in front of me, breathing heavy, "Why? Just because Stella moved in?" I laughed out loud, expression unchanged. "I'm not angry, just normal work transfer." "Such a big thing, why didn't you tell me?" I turned off tablet and stood up. "I don't think it's a big deal, and it's not decided yet." Finished, about to go back to bedroom. He held my hand, unwilling to let go, "But I am your boyfriend!" "You are not only my boyfriend," I looked straight into his eyes, answering him with his own words. "You are also Stella's neighbor brother. You just take good care of her first." Gavin froze. "Mia, are you mocking me?" I turned into the bedroom. No answer. Next day noon, Gavin unprecedentedly ran to company to find me. "Passed by, came up to see you. Dinner together after work okay?" I didn't even lift my head, "Not today, a document needed urgently, might have overtime." He changed face immediately, reached out grabbing my hand. I finally looked up at him. "Mia, are you sure you are not avoiding me? It's been over a week!" "My attitude was bad last night. Can you not go for transfer? Let's talk properly okay?" "Stella is really just my sister. The one I love is you. Can we stop making a scene?" He said a lot of questions in a row. The person chattering when encountering things changed from me to him. I felt even dealing with him was troublesome. "I really didn't make a scene, all normal work." "Go back to work quickly, I have to report work to boss upstairs." Finished, holding documents left office. Leaving Gavin on spot, looking at me for a long time. Chapter 4 A week before leaving for transfer, I was accidentally hit by a motorcycle while out. Large area of abrasions all over body, blood dyed clothes red. On the way to hospital, driver asked if I wanted to call family. I hesitated a moment but still texted Gavin. "I was hit by a motorcycle, got some injuries." He called, opening with: "Then go to pharmacy buy some ointment to apply, don't work today." I was silent for a moment, twitched lips self-deprecatingly. Calmly hung up phone. Medical treatment, go home, take medicine. Body hurt tearing heart and lungs, cold sweat layer after layer. Didn't eat a mouthful all day, until night waited for Gavin's call. "Mia, Stella has period cramps unbearable today, I sent her to hospital for injection, you rest early." I looked at my hideous wounds, tears finally fell. Until early morning, Gavin came home. Door opening sound woke me up. I heard him settling Stella after entering, then left quickly. "I go buy pads for you, rest quick." After a long time, outside movement finally quieted completely. He then pushed open my door. Saw my full body wounds at a glance. "Mia, how did you become like this?" "Get up quick, I take you to hospital!" Saying that wanted to come support me, I pushed away coldly directly. "No need, already went, all skin trauma." Gavin seemed relieved, tucked me in. "Alright then, you rest well, I go see Stella again." Then got up and left, didn't say one more word. I looked blankly at the closed bedroom door. Stella just period cramps, he busy before and after, hospital, buying pads. I car accident full body contusion laceration, even standing up hard, he said rest well. I couldn't help asking myself. "Mia, do you still love Gavin?" Until about to fall asleep, I suddenly shook my head. "Not anymore." ... Next day, I slept until sun high. Got up with difficulty, preparing to wash. But saw Gavin didn't go to work either, kneeling on one knee on ground, fiddling with something. I moved over looking at him, "Why didn't you go to work?" He looked up smiling, "Stella period cramps too severe, might faint anytime, I'm worried." My whole body stiffened. Just wanted to speak, saw "might faint anytime" Stella walking out of bedroom radiantly. "Brother Gavin, luckily you warmed my belly all night last night, I feel much better. Knew you love me most." Gavin smiled dotingly. "Of course, who does brother love if not you?" "Look, I bought you a heated coffee table rug, so your belly won't freeze when watching TV on sofa." I stood there, watching them talking and laughing, feeling like an outsider. Gavin finally seemed to remember me. "Mia, there is some black chicken soup I made for Stella in the morning in the kitchen, heat it up and drink some." Chicken soup. Seemingly nutritious and healthy. But something I never touch. I suddenly felt, between us, should end. I looked up at Gavin, asking back. "Do you still remember what I love to eat?"
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