
To show off to the boys, Brody started calling his "girlfriends" one by one. I was number thirteen. When the call connected, I turned on the sickly-sweet charm, giving him plenty of face in front of his crew. Just as I was about to hang up, a low, unfamiliar chuckle came from the background. Someone asked him, "What’s so funny, Declan?" "I’m laughing because all thirteen girlfriends are the same person." The air went dead silent. Then, the other end of the line exploded into chaos. "I was just thinking they all sounded similar! It turns out it's one person doing different voices!" "Brody, that girl is playing you like a fiddle!" Later, when I cornered Declan—the guy who exposed my hustle—I gritted my teeth and held out my hand. "You owe me..." Before I could finish saying money, the man placed his own hand into my palm. "Deal." Deal, my ass! I wanted him to compensate me for the cash I lost, not compensate me with a boyfriend! 1 When Brody called again, I spit out the cough drop I was using to soothe my throat. "Heyyy Brody~ Why are you calling me so late?" A roar of hooting and hollering erupted on his end. "Whoa! This one is even more high-pitched! Brody, you better comfort her!" I kept my face completely blank while listening to the noise. Brody cleared his throat, clearly pleased with himself. "Just having dinner with the boys. Missed you. Do you miss me?" My throat was practically smoking from doing this "baby voice" all night. This guy was a total piece of work—calling twelve times in one night with the exact same pickup line. He didn't change his script, so I had to change mine. I racked my brain, thinking of something different from the previous twelve flatteries. "I miss you to death! My heart literally trembles when I think of you." More cheering. Brody clearly felt like the man. Ding. My phone buzzed with a Venmo notification. "Sorry I woke you up. Go buy yourself a bag. Go back to sleep." My eyes lit up. I accepted the payment immediately, but didn't forget to stay in character. "Don't drink too much, okay? I'll be worried sick..." Suddenly, a cold, sharp laugh cut through the noise. I heard it clearly through the phone, and the noisy VIP room instantly went quiet. "Declan? ...What are you laughing at?" Brody asked. Clearly, this "Declan" guy had a higher status than Brody. Everyone was walking on eggshells around him. And anyone who could make a group of trust fund babies act this humble definitely had serious money. Brody didn't hang up, and as the perfect girlfriend, I couldn't hang up first. I took a sip of water, bored out of my mind. Being rich must be nice. If my thirteen accounts were dating him, I’d probably be making way more than I was skimming off Brody. While thinking this, I pulled out my ledger and started tallying up what Brody sent me tonight. Account Crystal: $520. Account Tiffany: $520. ... Account Amber: $1,340. I was calculating the total when I finally heard the man on the other end answer. "I'm laughing because all thirteen girlfriends are the same person." Whether on his side or mine, the silence was deafening. The pen tip bled ink onto my paper. My pupils constricted. Holy sht???* Chaos erupted on the other end. Brody’s voice came first. "Declan, what are you saying? How could..." Someone cut him off. "If Declan says it, it must be true! Brody, I was just thinking that! Why are their vocal tones so similar? It’s just one girl pinching her throat tighter each time!" "Yeah, I definitely heard a motorcycle revving in the background for both girlfriend number three and number seven." "Brody, you let one girl play you like a fool?" The more I heard, the more panicked I got. I hung up without a word. I should have taken voice acting classes! Rookie mistake! I forgot that not everyone in this world is as dumb as Brody. 2 I looked down at my cat, Luna, who was purring loudly. "You little motorcycle," I whispered. "Do you know you just blew my cover?" Brody’s texts started bombing my phone. [?] [I’ve been dating you this whole time? All of them are you?] [Speak! Crystal! Jessica! Tiffany! Sarah! Amber?!!! Which one is your real name!] [F*ck!] It seemed he really liked Amber, considering he used three exclamation points for her. So, I switched to the Amber account to reply. "Listen to my excuse... I mean, listen to my explanation." Brody called immediately. I cleared my throat and answered. "Brody~" He snapped instantly. "Don't call me that! Stop with the baby voice! Speak to me in your normal voice!" I coughed lightly. If I used my real voice, he’d recognize me instantly as his errand girl at school. No way. So, I started lying through my teeth. "It’s not like that, Brody. I didn't lie to you. I actually have Dissociative Identity Disorder. But all thirteen of my personalities fell in love with you." Brody hesitated. "Really...?" I kept buttering him up. "Of course. Didn't you notice their personalities were different? Tiffany is bubbly, Sarah is shy... but I, Amber, am the most gentle and understanding." Before I could finish, the room on his end erupted in laughter. I didn't realize he still had me on speaker. Clearly, Brody’s brain, which I had just confused, was snapped back to reality by his friends' mockery. "You're still lying to me! You were just after my money?!" Since I couldn't trick him anymore, I made up a random excuse and hung up. "Believe what you want. I'm using this money to treat my illness. Once I successfully summon the thirteen souls into one body, I'll come back for you." I collapsed on the bed and rolled my eyes. These past three months had exhausted me. I had been planning to break up with a few personas to lighten the workload, but this worked out—a mass layoff. I’d made a decent amount in three months. Enough to last a while. I wasn't worried about Brody calling the cops. Nobody knew him better than I did. Brody cares about his reputation more than life itself. He’s been collecting "followers" since high school. Four years later, only I—the invisible nobody—remained by his side as his gofer. Not because of loyalty, but because I have a high tolerance for nonsense. His friends already knew he got catfished. If he called the police, the whole school would know. So, I slept soundly. The next day, I saw Brody looking like he was constipated. His face was a mess. "What kind of bagel is this?! It tastes terrible!" He tossed the bagel into the trash, taking out yesterday’s anger on me. I lowered my head, looking submissive. "Sorry, Brody." Internally, I was rolling my eyes so hard I saw my brain. "Whatever. You haven't eaten either, right? Go buy yourself something." Brody couldn't stay mad at someone as pathetic-looking as me. He annoyedly Venmoed me fifty bucks and went back to sulking. I accepted it happily. This was my main job. The side hustle had high returns but high risks. My main job was stable. "Come on, it's not a big deal. You got scammed, so what? Drinks tonight?" One of Brody's friends draped an arm around him. "No mood. Not going." "Declan is going to be there. You're not going to buy him a round? Doesn't your family have a project pending with his family? If you miss this chance, good luck getting close to Declan again." My ears perked up. Declan. That must be the guy with the big mouth from yesterday. Brody looked conflicted, but eventually kicked a pebble at his feet. "Fine." After classes, I continued to trail Brody, but he stopped me before he got into his car. "Don't follow me tonight. Go have fun." He casually transferred me two hundred bucks and drove off. Looking at the nice sum on my phone, I hailed a cab and followed him. 3 I had to see what this guy who ruined my business looked like. I needed to memorize his face! And then... when I went to the temple to pray for wealth, I’d ask the universe to transfer all his financial luck to me. I watched Brody get out of his car, adjusting his jacket and trying to look cool. Seeing the golden facade of the club and the intense security, my curiosity suddenly waned. But just as I turned to leave, I saw Brody coming back out. At the same time, a sleek black car pulled up slowly beside me. "Declan, thanks for..." Brody’s suck-up expression froze on his face. His eyes met mine. I spun around, startled. When did someone stand behind me? The man was tall, wearing a black trench coat. He looked about the same age as Brody and me, but he carried an invisible aura of authority. I looked up at him. When our eyes met, my liver quivered. He was devastatingly handsome. "Riley? What are you doing here?" Brody interrupted my thoughts, looking at me weirdly. I was about to make up a lie about passing by, but then I felt a burning gaze on the back of my neck. I shut my mouth immediately. No. My voice was recognized yesterday. If I spoke now, in front of him, Brody would tear me apart right here. I pressed my lips together tight, pointed in a random direction, and bolted. "Does your family live around here?" Brody shouted after me. I nodded vigorously while sprinting away as if a pack of wolves were chasing me. Luckily, Brody is dense. He’ll make up an excuse for me. I ran three blocks before stopping. When I turned back, they were gone. I had seen his face clearly. It was the kind of face you don't forget. His gaze was sharp—he was obviously miles smarter than Brody. Hopefully, we’d never meet again. But the moment I got home, Brody called. I hung up. He started spamming texts. "Blah blah Riley blah blah, I'm drunk blah blah." I frowned and held the phone away. "Don't you live nearby? Come pick me up." He was drunk out of his mind, but he remembered to transfer money. $1,200. He probably added an extra zero by mistake. I wanted to pretend I didn't see it, but my fingers had already claimed the cash before my brain could stop them. Well, can't pretend now. When I arrived, Brody was the only one left in the private room. I let out a huge sigh of relief. "Brody?" Brody looked up, dazed, his cheeks flushed red from alcohol. "Waaaaah! Why did she leave me! Why did she lie to a pure-hearted boy like me?!" He wailed like a ghost, twisting around on the couch. I twitched my lip, ruthlessly exposing him. "A pure-hearted boy who dates thirteen girls at once?" Brody didn't understand. He just kept mooing like a cow. "Amber!" See? He really liked Amber the best. I sat on the sofa, planning to call an Uber to haul him back. But Brody, snot running down his face, tried to snuggle into my leg. "Demon! Do not desecrate me!" I slapped him away, stepped on his head to keep him down, and continued operating my phone. He wouldn't remember this tomorrow anyway. Stepping on a capitalist dog felt pretty good. 4 However, I was too naive. The door opened. I turned my head and locked eyes with a man whose expression was cool as ice. He raised an eyebrow, looking at Brody, who was crying under my foot. Forgive my ignorance, but why is there a secret door in a restaurant VIP room? Who puts a restroom inside the suite?! My vision went black. I quickly retracted my foot and tried to pull Brody up. But Brody hugged my leg and wouldn't let go. "Amber! Tiffany! You don't leave until you give me an explanation!" My scalp went numb. Do I speak? Do I not speak? Declan didn't help. He pulled out a wet wipe, cleaned his hands, sat opposite us, and watched the drama with amusement. If I didn't speak... oh god, Brody was about to wipe his nose on my jeans! I crouched down and whispered into Brody's ear like a demon. "Brody, it's me, Riley." Brody had a moment of clarity. He looked up, studied my face seriously, and then looked horrified. "Riley! Why does your voice sound like Darth Vader?!" Me: "..." Too low. "Are you taking him home?" The spectator finally spoke. Declan looked at me lazily. I don't know why, but under that half-smiling gaze, I felt completely exposed. I nodded. But looking at the notification that my fourth Uber driver had canceled, I wasn't so sure. "Unless you want to take him?" I hated hearing my own artificially lowered voice. It didn't sound like Darth Vader; it sounded like a lonely cow mooing at midnight. "My driver is out front," he said, sending a text. Relieved, I turned to flee, but a hand clamped onto my arm. Brody was crying like a 200-pound toddler. "Amber! Don't leave!" Helpless, I had to get into the luxury car with them. It was my first time in a Rolls Royce, but I couldn't enjoy it because Brody kept trying to bury his face in my chest. I had to use both hands to hold his head back. "Scammer! Waaah! Thirteen girlfriends and they all lied to me! Why is my life so hard! I lost love thirteen times in one second!" Brody cried louder and louder. Declan, in the passenger seat, rubbed his temples and opened the window. Fresh air rushed in. Finally, I didn't have to smell Brody's booze breath in the cramped back seat. I took a deep breath, but when I looked up, I saw those cold eyes watching me in the rearview mirror. My heart skipped a beat. Why was he staring at me? Before I could overthink it, Declan spoke. "Thirteen girlfriends. Brody really got played hard." I didn't reply. But he seemed determined to make me speak. "Is your voice always like that?" I let out another low moo, speaking with the speed of a sloth. "Huh? What... did... you... say?" He seemed amused, covering half his face with his knuckles and looking away. Suddenly, Brody sat bolt upright. "No! I still miss that evil woman! I need to ask her if she ever loved me!" I turned around in shock. What is this idiot doing? The next second, he pulled out his phone and dialed Amber. My phone, in my pocket, started ringing loudly. The air froze.
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