I had a two-year relationship with a younger guy. He was good-looking, sunny, energetic, and likable. When I planned to take things further, we had a conflict. In a fit of anger, the man stopped calling me "sister" and blurted out a phrase instead. "Old turtle." Later, at his lively birthday party, I happened to be dining at the next table with a new man I met. He rushed over crazily: "Sister, let's stop the cold war, okay?" I looked at him with a faint smile: "Sorry, we've already broken up." "By the way, don't call me sister anymore. Call me sister-in-law." 1 When the words came out, both Ethan Clark and I were stunned. "Old turtle." I never thought this term would come out of Ethan's mouth. "I, I didn't mean that." Ethan's face softened a bit, but his words still didn't yield an inch: "Anya, I'm only in my early twenties. Do you want me to be as lifeless as you at such a young age?" I felt inexplicably tired. Ethan is young and energetic. Still a graduate student, after we moved in together, he had dinner parties every two or three days, often playing until two or three in the morning before coming back. I didn't have his energy, plus with recent work pressure, I often suffered from insomnia and was a light sleeper. Every time Ethan opened the door and came back drunk at night, the noise would ruin my whole night. For one or two months in a row, my mental state had tightened into a string, and the fatigue caused by poor sleep eroded my body. I tried to persuade him to reduce such unnecessary gatherings. In a fit of anger, Ethan blurted out a sentence. "No wonder they all say you're an old turtle, an old woman who doesn't even allow parties." At that moment, I was stunned. It was as if I had never clearly known the man in front of me. Stalemate for a few minutes. Ethan's phone rang, and a male voice on the other end urged: "Ethan, haven't arrived yet? Not trapped at home by Sister Anya, are you?" "No way, Brother Ethan, that old turtle even restricts your personal freedom?" The latter sentence was said by a girl. I had seen this girl, considered the group favorite among Ethan's brothers. She looked cute and well-behaved, but her character was somewhat disgusting. "Shut up." Ethan frowned irritably and hung up the phone abruptly. He looked at me, his tone slightly softened: "I won't come back tonight, won't disturb your sleep." With a "bang", the door was closed. I stared at the direction of the door for a long time before lowering my eyebrows. Just four years older. When good, he sweetly called me sister. When arguing and angry, Ethan's truest thoughts were exposed. I am four years older than him. Old turtle. 2 Ethan indeed didn't come back that night. Having taken half a sleeping pill, I slept well for once. Woken up by my biological clock, it was only past six when I got up. There was a sound of the door opening outside the room. Getting up to wash and go out, outside was Ethan who just came back. He carried the breakfast I loved in his hand. Seeing me wake up, Ethan took out a small box from his pocket like offering a treasure, containing the necklace I had kept in my shopping cart for a long time but was reluctant to buy. "About last night, I said the wrong thing. Don't hold it against me, okay?" Ethan is like this. Relationships with younger guys aren't easy. In these two years, we argued quite a few times. He wasn't stingy in spending thought on me, various bouquets, luxury goods I fancied in my shopping cart but was reluctant to buy. In the past, coaxing would pass. But this time, I understood very clearly. This matter couldn't pass in my heart. The three words "old turtle" ultimately tore apart all the false affection between him and me. Very disgusting. Ethan thought this was just a trivial argument and vainly tried to coax me with the old tricks. But I felt it was extremely boring, tone flat: "I'm not angry anymore, go back to your room and catch up on sleep." Ethan breathed a sigh of relief. After he entered the room, I put the necklace on the entrance cabinet. This sweet date couldn't coax away the slap from last night. 3 In the following days, Ethan was busy with his studies, and his schedule became much more regular. Until the weekend, he tentatively asked me: "Sally Xu's birthday, singing karaoke tonight, won't play very late." Sally, the girl who called me "old turtle" on the phone that day. Also a girl, I could see Sally's meaning. "I haven't sung for a long time either." I looked at Ethan and suddenly said a sentence. Ethan was stunned: "Sister wants to go too?" "Can't I?" I rarely participated in his activities. In the first half-year of passionate love, he pestered me to go a few times. Later found that those noisy occasions were indeed not suitable for my personality. Gradually, our private lives were completely separated. The last time I met his friends was at Ethan's birthday party a few months ago. "It will be very noisy tonight, I'm afraid you won't adapt." Ethan vaguely made an excuse. I just shook my head calmly: "It's okay, no work tomorrow, I want to relax today too." Ethan's face was a bit unnatural, but he agreed. Just before going out, he chose an age-reducing hoodie for me and put it on me. "Looking at it this way, sister is a few years younger again." I smiled faintly without speaking. His brothers secretly despised my age a lot. Female three years older, hold a gold brick (Chinese saying implying older wife brings luck/wealth). They teased Ethan for having good taste, holding a gold brick just by dating. For a period at the beginning, Ethan drank all the gossipers under the table, cursing: "Say another word about my sister, I'll drink you to death!" At that time, Ethan probably really didn't mind the four-year age gap. Now things have changed, what he didn't care about has become a knot in his heart. 4 When we arrived at the KTV, it was already past eight. Just sat down, Ethan and his brothers mingled noisily. They greeted me politely, but their eyes were not welcoming. And as the birthday girl, Sally's expression was very exaggerated when she saw me: "Sister Anya, who bought you this hoodie? Twenty-eight years old already, wearing it looks really strange." "Sally." Ethan's voice carried a few warnings: "Our Anya looks very good in this hoodie, little girl doesn't understand don't talk nonsense." Sally snorted dissatisfiedly, squeezed away the person on Ethan's other side, and held his arm affectionately: "Alright Brother Ethan, rare to come out and play once, don't always stay by Sister Anya's side. Come over, I want to challenge you in dice!" Ethan didn't refuse such intimacy, turned his head to look at me, expression relaxed and handsome: "Sister, I'll go over for a while." "Okay." The venue heated up quickly. Young people of the same age without work pressure drank and played dice wantonly in the KTV. I held a glass of wine indifferently, watching Ethan's voice getting higher and higher. When winning against opponents, he high-fived Sally beside him naturally, posture intimate. Noisy, chaotic. Everything I hated. After the first half-year of passionate love, I actually calmed down slowly. Ethan has a wild nature, loves to play, and is energetic. A completely different nature from me. I used to think such different natures were complementary, exactly the missing half of each other. But slowly, I discovered. Too much difference in nature leads to problems popping up bit by bit. Different schedules, different hobbies. Normal rest time disturbed, leisure weekends just wanting to lie down, dragged by Ethan to various entertainment venues. I tried hard to adapt, in the end, only felt deep exhaustion from forcing myself to cooperate with him. I calmed down, thought seriously. Before the problem exploded, I always naively thought. Love can conquer all difficulties. "Brother Ethan, why did you push me!" Across a bar counter, Sally's dissatisfied voice came loudly. Ethan was a bit drunk, but Sally entangled him pretending to be intimate. At the moment their arms touched, Ethan's rejection voice was exceptionally clear. He said: "Go away, you are not our Anya, our Anya is not that tender."
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