
My intern asked for time off. I casually told her to submit the request on Slack. She immediately reported me to HR for sexual harassment. Later, while we were shopping, she passed a lingerie store and called the police to report it as a front for prostitution. When the angry store owner confronted us, she pushed me forward to take the blame. When I opened my eyes again, I was back on the day she asked for time off. This time, I looked at her innocent face and smiled. Obsessed with finding sexual innuendo in everything, are you? Fine. I'll show you what a truly hostile work environment looks like. 1 "Miss Quinn, I need to take some time off." The familiar voice made me shudder. I opened my eyes to see Bella, my intern, standing there with her trademark look of wide-eyed innocence. My nails dug into my palms until it hurt. The pain confirmed it: I wasn't dreaming. I had been reborn. Back to the day this walking nightmare asked for leave. In my past life, this simple request was the beginning of the end. When I told her to "Just submit it on Slack," she reported me for sexual harassment, claiming I was making inappropriate suggestions. That was just the start. Her delusional accusations piled up until that fateful day at the mall. She reported a lingerie shop for "indecency," and when the furious owner came out wielding a box cutter, she shoved me right into the blade. I died there on the cold tile floor. Taking a deep breath to steady my racing heart, I kept my voice calm. "Time off?" "Company policy requires you to submit a request through the system." Bella blinked her big eyes. "What system?" My heart skipped a beat. Here it comes. The trap. In my last life, I said "Slack." She immediately twisted it into something dirty. This time, I was ready. "The company's OA system." She tilted her head, her voice dripping with artificial sweetness. "What's an OA system? Miss Quinn, can you be more specific?" I knew she wouldn't let it go. I turned my monitor towards her. "This. The internal management portal. Every employee has a login." Bella stared at the screen for a few seconds before letting out a giggle. "Miss Quinn, why are you afraid to say the software's name? Is it because you're... thinking about something naughty?" The typing in the office stopped. I could feel every ear in the room perking up. 2 In my past life, this accusation caught me off guard. I stuttered, looked guilty, and lost the narrative. But this time? I set down my coffee mug. My voice wasn't loud, but it was crystal clear. "Bella, can you read?" "The words 'Internal Office Automation System' are right there on the screen. Can you not see them?" "Or is your brain wired so uniquely that it automatically filters everything into pornography?" Someone choked on their water in the break room. Shoulders were shaking with suppressed laughter around the office. Bella's face flushed crimson. "Miss Quinn! How can you say that? I was just joking!" "A joke? It wasn't funny." I kept my expression stern. "I told you to use the system. You insisted on knowing which one. I showed you the interface. Then you accused me of being afraid to say its name." "What, do you think 'Internal Office Automation' is too erotic? Do we need to rename it 'The Pure and Innocent Angels' System' to suit your delicate sensibilities?" "What do you mean by sensibilities?" Her eyes widened. I raised my voice slightly. "I mean you have a brain that sexualizes everything." "Like hearing 'submit' and thinking of BDSM. Hearing 'Slack' and thinking of... well, I apologize. I forgot you're just an innocent intern. I shouldn't be so graphic." The snickers in the office were audible now. Bella's eyes welled with tears, her lips trembling. "Miss Quinn, this is workplace harassment! I'm going to tell..." "Tell who? Director Vance?" I nodded toward the doorway behind her. "Perfect timing. She's right there." 3 Lydia Vance clattered over in her four-inch heels, looking at me like she was watching a train wreck she had personally engineered. This woman, who started at the same time as me but always treated me like an enemy, had fueled the fire every time Bella attacked me in my previous life. Lydia stopped in front of my desk, frowning. "What's going on? I could hear you shouting from the hallway." Bella immediately switched to victim mode, eyes red and teary. "Director Vance, Miss Quinn said my brain is full of... dirty things..." I scoffed. "Is that what I said? Repeat my exact words." She sniffled. "You said I sexualize everything..." Lydia immediately stepped in front of Bella, shielding her like a mother hen. "Quinn, is this how a supervisor speaks to an intern?" Calmly, I pulled up the chat log on my computer. "Director Vance, do you know the context?" "Bella wanted time off. I told her to use the system. She insisted on knowing which one. I showed her the interface." "Then she asked why I was 'afraid' to say the name of the software. Is that normal behavior?" Lydia paused, shooting a questioning glance at Bella. Bella jumped in hurriedly. "But she was acting weird! Normal people just say the name of the app!" "I'm just a new intern! I don't know anything! Asking for clarification is normal!" "You call that normal?" I raised an eyebrow. "Okay, tell me. What name would have been acceptable to you? Slack? WeChat? Or..." I lowered my voice to a conspiratorial whisper. "Do you need me to spell it out? S-L-A-C-K?" "Is that clear enough? Or does the spelling trigger some other inappropriate fantasy for you?" "Quinn!" Lydia snapped. "Watch your language!" I spread my hands innocently. "I am teaching an intern how to use company tools. What part of my language is inappropriate?" "Unless you also think the word 'Slack' is problematic, Director Vance? Should we petition headquarters to rename it 'The Work Chat Thingy'?" 4 The office erupted in laughter. Lydia's face turned a sickly shade of green. She threw her hands up and stormed off. Bella looked like a cat whose tail had been stepped on. Her face cycled through several shades of red and white. Finally, she stammered, "You... you're all bullying me! I'm going to HR!" I helpfully handed her the employee handbook. "Go ahead." "While you're there, ask them if an intern refusing to follow basic leave procedures counts as wasting company resources." "Oh, and page 38 outlines the leave policy clearly. I suggest you learn how to read first." Bella snatched the book and ran off, sobbing. Lydia shot me a venomous glare before chasing after her. I sat back down, my fingers trembling slightly. This was just the beginning. I had a whole life's worth of debt to collect. By afternoon tea, the office gossip mill was churning. I heard several versions of the story. The most ridiculous one was that Bella cried to HR claiming I sent her explicit GIFs. I was speechless. While I was internally rolling my eyes, my assistant, Zoe, leaned over. "Quinn, Director Vance just transferred Bella to her team." I paused, spoon midway through stirring my coffee. "When?" "Just now. After Bella came out of HR, Lydia took her straight to her department. She said..." Zoe hesitated. "Said what?" "She said she'd mentor Bella personally and wouldn't let her suffer such injustice." I almost laughed out loud. Two birds with one stone. Not only did I shut Bella down, but I also got rid of her. And the cherry on top? Lydia Vance took her in. Oh, Lydia. In my last life, you loved watching me burn. Did you ever think you'd be the one holding the match?
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